Doubts

BY : Talliya
Category: Final Fantasy VII > Yaoi - Male/Male
Dragon prints: 766
Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to Final Fantasy 7 or its characters. This work is not for profit.

Angeal woke up with no vestiges of the alcohol from the night before in his system. He, like Sephiroth was instantly alert when woken, he instantly took note that there was a weight on his arm and a warm naked body cuddled next to him, his other arm resting on a well muscled hip. He opened his eyes and looked down at the head of silky black hair that rested on his arm, a smile gracing his lips at the sight. Tseng was so damned adorable!

That was when the doubts assailed him. Tseng, even while drunk, had said that he was only his for the night. He nearly sighed aloud, but just barely refrained, not wanting to make the Turk suspicious. He could tell the man was waking up, that he had somehow sensed that Angeal was awake now. He leaned forward and kissed Tseng’s temple before gently disentangling himself from the other man. He quickly picked up his scattered clothing and headed for the bathroom. Dropping the clothes on the back of the toilet he took a piss and then hopped in the shower. A few minutes and a good scrubbing later he stepped out and dried off. He didn’t really want to put on the clothes he’d worn and sweated in so much the day before, but he didn’t really have much of a choice. It wasn’t like he’d planned to stay the night in some random hotel.

When he stepped out of the bathroom Tseng was standing there, apparently waiting for him to get out because he went in as soon as Angeal cleared the door. Shortly after the shower came on. Angeal took a quick look around to make sure he had everything; Clothes? He put his socks and shoes on. Wallet? Picked up from its place on the floor and placed into his back pocket. Yep, he was set. He moved over to the mirror on the wall and finger combed his hair, then checked the clock. Only 0600, he could worry about brushing his teeth and breakfast once he got back to his apartment at HQ.

He had just had the best sex of his life! Granted it was only the second time he’d ever had sex, but still. Way better than Genesis at sixteen. But now he had no idea how to talk to Tseng, should he say something? And if he should, what the fuck should he say?! He flinched as the shower shut off, then winced at himself in the mirror for having such a stupid reaction. He’d just wait and see what Tseng did, the man had certainly done this more times than he had.

Tseng came out dressed and with his PHS already to his ear. Angeal pouted for half a second before turning to face him with a raised eyebrow.

“That will be fine, thanks Shotgun.” He closed the PHS and looked over to see Angeal’s expression, “Shotgun will be here to pick us up and take us back to HQ shortly.”

Angeal nodded and they went downstairs to wait. A week or so later Angeal was at his locker after a training bout with Genesis and Sephiroth. They’d just finished their showers and were getting dressed, okay, Angeal was turning to get dressed and the other two were still drying their hair.

“You seem much happier lately, finally get laid?” Genesis asked him with a teasing grin.

Angeal turned to look at him with a brow raised, “Why would getting laid make me happier?”

Genesis pouted but before he could say anything Sephiroth butted in, “Wait, what? You mean you didn’t? Even after all the effort I put in?!”

Angeal blinked at him then rolled his eyes and heaved a sigh before reaching into his locker for a clean pair of boxers. “Making me horny does not that mean I’ll be getting sex.”

Genesis looked over to Sephiroth shocked, “You made him horny? What the fuck Seph!?”

Sephiroth flinched away from his lover, his hands raised in surrender. “No...that’s…”

“Wow Gen, jealous much? But no, I don’t get horny because of either of you. He got Tseng all wet so that his clothes were basically not even there they were so plastered to him.” Angeal saved his friend from the temper that was Fireball Genesis.

“Oh~.” He turned to Angeal with big eyes, “And how did that go?”

“Fine?” Angeal turned back to his locker and pulled out a white tank top undershirt and his under armor. It hadn’t been a lie when he and Tseng had been talking about how much the SOLDIER uniform sucked. He’d much rather wear jeans and a t-shirt, or cargo pants… he liked cargo pants. He shrugged his massive shoulders, “We went for dinner at a place below the plate and then to a club in Sector 8. Got so drunk we stumbled into a hotel instead of coming back.”

“And had sex?” Genesis pried.

“Of course they did. You know how Tseng gets when he’s drunk.” Sephiroth said, an obvious smirk in his voice.

Angeal didn’t react, “So what if we did?”

Genesis’ jaw dropped, “How can you think about having sex - with TSENG of all people - and not even have a dick twitch over it? Was it that bad?”

Angeal gave him a disgusted look, “Of course it wasn’t bad.” He hurriedly finished dressing: boxers, tank, under armor, slacks, stiff button-up long sleeved shirt, jacket, socks, boots, belt, sword sheath, sunglasses to help with the overly bright lights in the unSOLDIER-proofed parts of ShinRa HQ. He mumbled on his way out, “I doubt anything could be worse than my first time.”

He missed Sephiroth’s curious look and Genesis’ very obvious flinch. As the door closed behind him he let out a sigh then started off down the hall, it was time for his training session with Zack anyway.

“Um, excuse me? Commander Hewley Sir?” A small voice called from behind him.

He paused and turned around, looking down he saw a young man with yellow hair and bright blue eyes in the Cadet uniform. ‘This kid has a chocobo’s butt on his head.’ He thought to himself, having to restrain a sudden laugh. “Yes Cadet?”

“Um, I’m sorry Sir. But Zack, um, SOLDIER 2nd Class Zack Fair, asked me to tell you that he’s seeing Aerith and might be late, Sir.”

Angeal sighed again, “Of course he did. Even the Puppy has someone to spend time with.” He rubbed a hand over his face.

“Sir?”

“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.” He gave the Cadet a smile, “What’s your name?”

“Cadet Cloud Strife, Sir.” The young man saluted him again making his smile widen.

“Ahh, so you’re the new friend Fair has been going on about.” The boy blushed.

“Don’t you have classes?”

“Not right now Sir, I’ve a free period after lunch. That’s why I was able to give you the message Sir.”

“Ahh.” Angeal nodded his head, “Well you go on a take your break. I unfortunately need to get back to work.”

The boy nodded and saluted again, Angeal saluted him back and the boy scampered off. He headed to his office and spent the rest of the day looking over reports.

===

Tseng had woken just as Angeal kissed his temple, his eyes snapped open making it so he didn’t miss the sad look on the man’s face as he left the bed. He wondered about that, how could he possibly be sad? They’d had some of the best sex of his life, how could anyone be sad after that? But he closed his eyes and listened as Angeal picked up his clothing and headed into the bathroom.

He sat up as the shower started and hunted around for his own clothing. He thought about joining the Commander in the shower, but figured that might be too much for him. Perhaps that saddened expression had been because he regretted having sex with him while they were drunk? That was the only conclusion the Turk could come to. Angeal’s ‘honor’ just had to get in the way of everything!

When the man came out of the bathroom he silently took his place, showering and dressing, taking a piss. Then he dialed up Turk Central for a ride. As he exited the bathroom he didn’t miss Angeal’s pout from the reflection in the mirror. But when the man turned to face him it was as if nothing had ever happened between them. Tseng had never had a lover act like that before, it stung a little. So after explaining that Shotgun was going to pick them, he remained silent.

But he was cranky and all of his Turks knew it. They steered clear of him if they could help it, but he heard them whispering to each other. Wondering if the honorable ‘wonder boy’ had left him high and dry. Since they knew that if he didn’t get sex when he wanted it he tended to be an asshole. He couldn’t tell them that the sex had been amazing, that it was the morning after that had him pissy. He couldn’t even tell his ‘little brother’ who he told every sordid thing too, because the man he was pissy at was one of his ‘little brother’s’ best friends! Not being able to vent made him even pissier.

Watching the cameras a week or so later he found the three elites just coming out of the shower. He watched as Angeal toweled himself dry, completely unconcerned with his nakedness. A surge of something flowed through Tseng and he wanted very much to make sure no one else ever saw that rock hard body ever again. But he quashed it, because that was ridiculous. He turned the sound up on the feed just as Genesis commented on how happy Angeal had been lately - quite the opposite from himself.

He watched as Angeal turned to look at Genesis with a raised brow and answered, “Why would getting laid make me happier?”

Tseng blinked, didn’t it make everyone happier? He had certainly been happy afterwards, only to have it ruined. His ‘little brother’s’ response had him tuning back in, “Wait, what? You mean you didn’t? Even after all the effort I put in?!”

Tseng face-palmed, so that’s why he had turned the sprinklers on. Stupid ass. “Making me horny does not that mean I’ll be getting sex.”

Tseng’s jaw dropped, that stupid fucking ass! How dare he not shout to the world how great the sex had been?! He was so angry at Angeal he missed out on how angry Genesis had gotten. Only paying attention again as Angeal mentioned that neither of the other SOLDIER members could make him horny and explained what Sephiroth had done.

“Oh~. And how did that go?” Genesis’ voice grated on his ears, but he was desperate to hear Angeal’s answer.

“Fine?” It sounded almost like a question, Tseng blinked. He watched as Angeal pulled out all the clothes he needed to dress, enjoying every flex of muscle even though he was still angry at the man. Then those massive shoulders shrugged, “We went for dinner at a place below the plate and then to a club in Sector 8. Got so drunk we stumbled into a hotel instead of coming back.”

Tseng winced, well that was one way of putting it.

“And had sex?” Genesis’s wheedling voice again.

“Of course they did. You know how Tseng gets when he’s drunk.” Sephiroth said, an obvious smirk in his voice. Ouch, a little below the belt there brother mine. Tseng made a mental note to kick Sephiroth’s ass in the near future, the very near future.

“So what if we did?” The deadpanned remark had the Turk focusing on the scene again instead of inventive ways to make Sephiroth suffer.

“How can you think about having sex - with TSENG of all people - and not even have a dick twitch over it? Was it that bad?” Genesis sounded appalled, and frankly Tseng was! Completely outraged really.

Angeal turned and gave the redhead a disgusted look, “Of course it wasn’t bad.”

But that was all he said about it before getting dressed, which Tseng thoroughly enjoyed watching though he’d never admit it. Tseng almost missed the mumbled words as the man left the locker room. But he didn’t miss Genesis’ flinch or Sephiroth’s quizzical expression. “I doubt anything could be worse than my first time.”

The Turk assumed that said first time had obviously been with Genesis, but if it had been so awful, how was the large man so fucking perfect at it now? Just the memory of that hot mouth literally swallowing his cock had him flushing and readjusting in his seat. He followed Angeal’s movements and watched as a mere Cadet got the man to finally smile. It irked him to no end. He watched as Angeal went to his office, but once he had ascertained that the man wouldn’t be leaving any time soon he headed off in search of Sephiroth. The man needed an ass kicking.

He had a pretty good bout with Sephiroth, thoroughly beating him, though that was mostly due to the fact that he had just had a four hour long training session with Genesis and Angeal. But, Tseng could have beaten him anyway… it just would have taken longer than an hour. An hour of him mostly toying with him. Having blown off some steam he headed back to his own office and his own paperwork.

Around dinner time Rude came in with a tray for him, for which he was thanked, Tseng really didn’t want to go to the cafeteria with the mood he was in. Hours later, finally completely frustrated with himself and Angeal he slammed his pen down and marched from his office and to the elevator. He went to the top, then hopped into the next elevator that lead to the uppermost rooms. Rooms in which the SOLDIER elite were housed.

===

Angeal had gone and eaten dinner and then simply gone to his apartment. He hadn’t really been getting much work done anyway. Genesis and Sephiroth had completely ruined his good mood. They’d got him thinking about how Tseng really had only wanted him because he was drunk. He felt used. It had been the most dishonorable thing he’d done since he set a code for himself to live by. After being told what a horrible lover he was by his best friend when he was an impressionable sixteen year old, he’d vowed to never be with someone just because they wanted his body, ever again. And what had he done? Let some drunk smuck use him when he KNEW it wouldn’t mean anything to him!

He had just changed into his pajamas, a pair of deep blue flannel pants that Tseng had gotten him for his last birthday, when his door was thrown open. His locked door.

He turned to glare at whoever it was that would dare to pick his lock and then just stared.

===

Tseng used his override keycard to unlock Angeal’s door before busting in. He had the satisfaction of watching the glare on the other man’s face turn to one of confusion before he marched in and slammed the door closed behind him.

“What the hell is your problem?” Tseng threw the words at him like they were daggers.

“What are you talking about?” Angeal was seriously confused, why was Tseng in his room? Had he done something that required a Turk’s attention?

“Was sex with me really that terrible?” Tseng growled at him.

Angeal blinked completely stupefied. “Why would you think that?”

“I…” Tseng paused, he couldn’t let on that he watched him in the locker room, Angeal would stop being naked in there if he did that! “Sephiroth mentioned something earlier when I was kicking his ass.”

Angeal was suddenly angry again and spit out between clenched teeth, “Of course he would.”

“Well! Was it?” Tseng demanded.

Angeal deflated and sat on the edge of his bed, “No, of course it wasn’t. It was fantastic. But…”

“But what?” Tseng didn’t understand what the problem was.

“Look, I’m not like you guys. I don’t just have sex with random people willy nilly.” Angeal was angry enough at others butting into his life that he didn’t care what he admitted too anymore. “Goddess, including you I’ve only ever had sex twice! Why does everyone think that’s such a horrible thing?!”

It was Tseng’s turn to blink, completely blindsided by that. He couldn’t even find a proper response to the man basically calling him a whore. “Only twice? How is that possible? Surely you’ve asked?”

“Um, no, not really. I mean, I’ve been asked by a couple of girls… but that’s just gross.” Angeal admitted.

“Why?” Tseng just couldn’t believe it, “Why haven’t you asked anyone?”

Angeal threw himself back onto the bed, “Because I only ever wanted one person, even before the first time I ever had sex. But all he ever did was dump me on my ass. So I gave up. It seemed more honorable than chasing after someone who didn’t even like me as a person.”

Tseng walked over to the bed and looked down at Angeal’s resigned face. “You’re talking about me aren’t you?”

Angeal nodded and blushed slightly but refrained from looking away, hiding now would be dishonorable.

Tseng scowled, “Then what. The. Fuck. Is your problem?”

Angeal rolled his eyes and sat up, turning on the bed to fully face Tseng. “The problem is that you’ve only ever wanted me when you were drunk. I want to have an actual relationship not some wacky fling. I want what Gen and Seph have. Hell, even the puppy as a girlfriend!”

Tseng took a step back, surprised by the venom spouting from the Honorable Angeal’s lips. It wasn’t as if wanting to fuck Angeal had been a spur of the moment thing simply because he was drunk. It was just that he could never loosen up enough for said activity without being drunk. Another reason why Sephiroth’s comment from earlier had cut so much. “Oh for crying out loud!”

He stepped into Angeal’s space and grabbed his head, angling it so that he could kiss him. “I’ve wanted to have sex with you for ages. I got us drunk on purpose! It’s the only way I know of to relax myself!”

Angeal was stunned and he blinked stupidly at him for a moment before grabbing his hips and yanking the man onto the bed with him. “I’m pretty sure I know a better way to relax you.”

Tseng had tensed at the movement and squeaked yet again when he was pulled onto the bed, “Oh really? Because I doubt it.”

Angeal pouted for a second before an evil grin crossed his face and he leaned over Tseng to capture his mouth with his own. He kissed him until Tseng was moaning for more, his body a writhing mass of nerve endings that needed ‘more’. “How about it?”

Tseng took a moment to register the question and then punched Angeal’s shoulder, “Just fuck me.”

Hours later as they lay naked, side by side in Angeal’s bed, Tseng had to ask. “How did you not even have a dick twitch at the mention of having sex with me?”

Angeal didn’t even question how he knew that, “Because I knew the question was coming and thought of President ShinRa naked.”

“Oh Gaia! How could you do that to me!” Tseng looked over at him horrified, “I need brain bleach! Stat!”



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