Reprimand Me, For I Have Sinned | By : Squallsama Category: Final Fantasy VII > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 974 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
By: Squall-sama
Pairings: CidxVincentxCloud
=^_^=
Warnings: NC-17—LEMON! ANGST!!
MAJOR SQUICK-ishness! If you don’t like that sort of thing, or your stomach
can’t handle it—then I suggest you stop where you read! BIG TIME Sap and FLUFF towards
the end. okay, yes, see… this is the W-A-R-N-I-N-G!
That’s right, warning! Anybody who doesn’t like the ratings of what I put on
here—GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!!! I’m not liable for some dumb-ass kid or adult
that has nothing better to do than act stupid and flame me because they can’t
read. But if you like MALExMALE SEX!!! Then come right on in and enjoy!=^_^=
Disclaimer: Don’t own them, don’t
sue me; Square Soft, Playstation and Sony Arts own them—not me!
Notes: This is the first time
I’ve ever written something so… gory (in my opinion at least) so bear with me,
k?! Oh, yes, and some people might think, by the way I write that my fics are
all going to turn into deathfics? NO-WAY!!! I HATE deathfics and I will NEVER
write them, so there! Also, I know it seems I might have favored Cloud in
this—but I couldn’t help it. Originally I couldn’t decide who to pair Vincent
with, so I just went with both!
~
~ ~ ~
~
~Reprimand Me, For I
Have Sinned~
Eyes.
Tears.
Voices.
Blood….
The bouquet of roses laying upon
the small table staring back at me—laughing it seems… bites on my nerves; the
brilliant red a drastic contrast to my stark white skin. Shut up.
I glare at them, as if it will do
any good—like I will get any kind of reaction out of them. I frown at my
immaturity—turning my burning gaze to the mirror across from me. I glare back
at myself—my horrid white skin and flashy black hair and the eyes… my eyes, the
bloody red that they are—the awful reminder of who I was, what I had done to bring
this kind of torture into my life…… what I am now….
I quickly tear my eyes away from
the disgusting vision before me, only to have them land on yet, more evidence
of what I have become—reminding me of what I am and always will be—a monster.
Already feeling the damned blood
tears welling up in my eyes, I clench the fabricated metal claw into as tight a
fist as I can, hearing the almost unbreakable substance groan and grind as
metal slices through metal. I know Cloud and Cid will have my head for this
later…. Forget them…
I feel one hot tear escape its
prison, tracking its way down my flawless cheek; upset over a little thing like
this….
So I can’t feel the pain I want to,
and I’m not completely human anymore—I’m a monster, I know… so why am I still
crying like some pathetic woman? I look back down at the roses—they almost seem
to wilt under my gaze now… good.
In a fit of rage I pick the whole
bouquet up and throw it across the room, knocking a picture off the wall in the
process. I sneer—the shattering of the glass as the photo falls to the floor
brings some sort of sick relief to my muddled mind. I glare at the broken frame
and glass, the crushed roses too, wishing I could do
more harm there—wishing perhaps it had been me shattering into a thousand tiny
pieces. No…
Suddenly, as quickly as it had
come, all the anger and violence has left me, leaving me open and raw to my
tormented soul and emotions. I look back down at my claw, whimpering at the
tattered sight it’s in. I suppose I should clean up that mess as well….
I wearily trudge over to the mess I
made on the carpeted floor, collapsing ungracefully to the floor before the
roses and glass. As I start to pick up the broken pieces of the tacky frame and
few remaining—unbroken roses, I realize how ironic the picture before me is: a
rose among the thorns… the sharp glass reminding me eerily of my twisted and
tattered life and the rose, well the rose was
what I once was—long ago….
As I reach to pick up an unbroken
rose I pull back abruptly, a hidden piece of glass slicing my finger open. I
watch as bright red blood quickly oozes from the wound on my hand. But instead
of seeking the required attention someone would normally need in a situation
like this, I just sit there, staring at the wound with some sort of twisted
fascination as it heals and closes on its own within a matter of seconds.
The pain comes again—not the
physical pain, not the kind of relief I seek… but the tormented, mental anxiety
of living a life like this—an unnatural one where unnatural things like healing
completely after an injury that would have required stitches brings upon you…. No more…
Goddamn it, I can’t take it
anymore!!
Quickly grabbing up the shards of
glass, I clench them tightly into my hands, the satisfaction of skin breaking
and glass grinding against bone, making me grind out a smile between my
clenched teeth. But I refuse to back down! I don’t want this—I don’t want to be
a monster anymore!! I want to feel the pain in my left hand again—I want stand
in the warm rays of sunlight and get a tan instead of burning from the softest
shard of light. I want to feel life again….
So now I sit here with gory shards
of glass stuck in my hand, as it literally begins to heal around the offending
objects. I watch as my life-blood oozes from the gashing wounds and stare at
the bleach-white of my bones…… Nobody should have to live through this kind of
torture, this sickening sight.
Suddenly the pain and sight is too
much to bear and I let out a piercing wail of defeat, screaming as my wings of
Chaos tear from their confines of the skin on my back. I shudder from the
horrid pain that courses through my body at the sudden extra appendages—this
frail body not able to bear the immense pain of their release.
I fall forward, not able to hold
myself up with the added weight and the sudden dizziness that accompanies this
slightly evolved form. I can distantly feel hot blood flowing down my back and
dripping off of my leathery wings in rivulets, just as I feel it still flowing
down my good arm and hand, pooling at my knees and forming a large, squishy
puddle in the carpet beneath me.
I curl up tightly, folding my wings
around me for more protection; I slowly begin to rock back and forth, cradling
myself within the folds of unnatural—beastly leather that surrounds me. The
aching pain in my hand unwilling to leave since I pushed the glass too far in
for my body to push it back out or for it to heal completely this time…. Good.
Somewhere in the back of my muddled
mind, I hear shouts and rushed footsteps, a door slamming open and loud voices
surrounding me... but none of it seems to matter—I don’t care anymore, I just
want the pain to go away—all of it. I flinch away from the delicate touch on
the skin of my back that my wings couldn’t cover—it hurts… just… stop…
Softly, the touch moves to my
sensitive wings sending shivers down my spine. Far back in my mind I feel a
touch of familiarity, like the ‘intruding’ touch belongs to something or
someone I know… someone I care for….
“… cent?”
Words begin to break through, but I can’t make them out—so soft they are and so
far away I am.
“… incent?”
They seem to become clearer—I want to come back—I don’t wan to stay in the
dark; in the dark all the bad things happen….
“Vincent…?” Vincent? Vincent… that
is my name… yes, I know now… and the one speaking it is…
“Vincent? C’mon, snap out of it…
please….” No, there is more than one, I remember, they both care for me as I
care for both—with all of my black tattered soul….
“Vincent? Please, come back to us…”
Cloud…
“C’mon, damn it! Wake up—you’re
bleedin’ all over the damned floor!” Cid…
Ahhh… my two lovers, yes… I remember
now…… Cid, so brash and outgoing… and Cloud—my precious, innocent Cloud….
Distantly I feel my wings parting
to open myself up to my two worried lovers, instantly feeling myself being
lifted from the blood-stained floor and half dragged, half carried to somewhere
I’m only dimly aware of as being much brighter and much colder than where I had
previously been.
“Vincent? Look at me…. Open your
eyes… please?” I didn’t even realize I’d had them closed, until I tried opening
my sensitive eyes to sharp light of the small bathing room. I immediately
squeezed them shut again—the offending light hurting too much to keep my eyes
open. I could hear Cid grunt disapprovingly to the side of me, about what I
couldn’t say—a lot has happened.
I feel warm hands at my face then,
gently brushing back my long hair. I dare to open my eyes again, slowly this
time, so as not to hurt the sensitive cores of my eyes; my blurry vision slowly
focuses and the wonderful sight of my mako-eyed angel appears before me, worry
etched across his lovely features. I smile softly at him and move to reach for
his face, but stop when I realize the large shards of glass are still embedded
within my hand.
Instantly, regret and sorrow fill
my entire being and I hang my head in defeat. This was never supposed to
happen. The roses, the glass, Cloud—Cid. I don’t
deserve them—I don’t deserve any of it—it’s all too good for me… I need more,
more pain, more suffering….
“I’m sorry…” I hear myself whisper softly, not
expecting either of the two men before me to hear. Cloud touches my face again,
trailing his thumb down the path my blood tears have taken and his eyes reveal
so much love and acceptance it hurts.
“Don’t be sorry… it’s not your
fault. I just wish you wouldn’t torture yourself like this….” A loud snort to
my right is Cid’s only reply to that and then he says defiantly,
“Like it would do any damned good!
Can’t we ever get anything through that thick skull of yours?! Now you have two
inches of glass sticking out of your fucking hand! You’re lucky you heal fast.”
Unexpected anger wells up in me at that comment. Lucky,
lucky?! Why in the hell would I be lucky to be a monster—a freak!?!
Before I get out of control, I feel
Cloud’s hands on me once more, this time holding me down. I tear my glare away
from Cid to Cloud’s bright blue eyes once more, the loving depths of emotion
within them, calming my raging soul. I sigh sadly and lower my head once more,
feeling stupid and childish for getting upset at someone I love.
Suddenly I feel a large, heavy hand
on my shoulder and warm lips pressed to my temple; a soft, “Sorry” is whispered
and Cid pulls away, grabbing my hand in the process. I flinch at the sharp pain
that shoots through my arm at the sudden movement; Cloud reprimands Cid for his
carelessness, but Cid just mumbles something unintelligible and shrugs it
off—as always. I smile softly at my lovers, before intense pain courses through
my entire being. I gasp out a breath of air, at the shock of a large shard of
glass slowly being removed from my hand.
The tears form in my eyes quickly
at such pain. I glance to Cloud, who has turned his face away from the site—I
don’t blame him—it makes me sick to look at it, but for some reason I’m drawn
back to watch as Cid bravely removes yet another broken piece of glass—this one
pulling with it a few cords and tendons from my battered hand.
Somehow I fight the tears of pain,
even though my hand is literally being torn apart before my eyes, I have to get
past this… I have to be strong. Hell, I’ve lived through transforming into
Chaos, I can survive this little bump in the road… though I feel as though I’m
going pass out any second—I’ve lost too much blood, even for me….
I have to move my sight away from
my hand as Cid comes to tough spot, unable to remove the piece of glass, he is
pulling on. It’s sickening, feeling the offending object in your hand, knowing
it’s there and seeing it, buried in your skin… and then having someone tug on
it, but having it not break free—even for me that’s too much and I feel the
beginnings of my earlier meal trying to force its way up. Suddenly I feel arms
around me, wrapping around my neck and holding me tight. Cloud… I can tell it’s
hard for him too, but the embrace has kept me from losing my lunch—so to speak.
Too slowly, it takes Cid too long
to remove all the shards of glass it seems, but as soon as he removes the last
piece, I feel the unnatural powers of my body take control and push any
remaining shards of glass from my hand and heal the shredded wounds.
I flex my right hand
experimentally; it doesn’t hurt, just a dull ache reminding me of what I have
done to myself. I look up at Cid who is now staring down at me with a raised
eyebrow, as if waiting for some explanation he knows won’t come. I frown and
bring my now healed hand around to hold Cloud to me tighter. He doesn’t fight
the embrace, on the contraire, he leans even further into me, as if trying to
burry himself within my very skin, just like those shards of glass had been.
I rise to my feet, bringing Cloud
with me—he follows quite willingly, clutching onto my cloak tightly as I lead
him to the bed… I know Cid is following us as well. Once we reach the oversized
mattress, I deposit Cloud upon it and sit down next to him. The silence of the
room now is calming, peaceful; it doesn’t bother me to be in this solitude of
warmth… Cloud and Cid are here now. They bring that to my full attention too,
when I feel a light tug at my protective cloak and warm, strong hands on my
aching shoulders, reminding me that my wings are still present, but I can’t
seem to make them go away—I lack the strength to do anything of that sort right
now.
I let the gentle pull of Cloud’s persistent
hands drag me to the top of the bed where I’m positioned above my blonde angel,
the young man staring back up at me adoringly. I smile down at the boy before
me and run my now healed hand through his wild locks of hair, eliciting a soft
moan from Cloud’s sweet lips. I lean forward and kiss his lovely red lips softly,
afraid that if I push any harder, I might break him. He doesn’t seem to mind
though and presses up against me, harder, wrapping his skinny arms around my
neck to pull me closer.
I relent and let Cloud pull me down
atop his smaller frame; as I ravish his sweet mouth I distantly feel another’s
hands upon me, pulling at my clothes as well as Cloud’s. I’m startled from the
intense kiss Cloud and I are sharing though, when the loud tearing of clothing
echoes in my ears. I snap my head back to glare at Cid, who is now holding my
tattered cloak and undershirt in his hands—in pieces. He just smirks at me and
tosses the remains of my clothing on the floor; I sigh in exasperation, I guess
it doesn’t matter, I would have had to get new clothes anyway….
I’m pulled from my thoughts once
more though, when Cloud presses his hand to my face, turning it so I am staring
back at him again; he’s pouting—so like my sweet angel…… Whenever I’m not
paying attention to him, he gets so jealous. I smile down at him again, and return
to kissing his petal-soft lips. As Cloud and I battle with each other, I feel
another set of lips join in, only on my back, between the two enormous wings
that now rest where my shoulder blades once were.
They are quite persistent in their
pursuit, suckling and licking their way down the sensitive skin of my back; I
can’t help but moan and arch into the touch. I abruptly break off the kiss
between Cloud and myself, to let out a hoarse shout when calloused hands begin
to massage my quivering leather wings.
I’ve never felt pleasure like this
before; then again, Chaos’ wings have never come out either. The pleasure is
almost overwhelming and I growl lightly for Cid to stop… he just hums softly
and kisses my neck. I let out another sharp gasp when I feel smaller hands
tweaking my nipples playfully, molding them into hard nubs on my pale chest. I
stare back down at the glittering eyes of Cloud; he smiles impishly up at me,
then moves to cover one of my hard nipples with his talented mouth.
Suddenly I’m feeling pulled in two
directions, I don’t know whether to lean back, into Cid’s ministrations, or to
push forward, into that wicked mouth of my little angel’s. I can’t take the
pleasure of both tortures, and I pull Cloud’s head away from me, once more
covering his lips with my own. I pull away quickly, leaving Cloud dazed as I
almost tear his shirt from his lithe body. He quickly finds himself though and
helps me remove the obtrusive articles of cloth—soon his clothing finds a home
on the floor with my tattered cloak and shirt.
With Cloud freed from any more
obstacles, I rake my healed hand down his chest and stomach, dragging a moan
from his lips as he arches up to meet my touch. Another moan from behind,
breaks me from my reverie as, I can only assume, Cid is now staring at Cloud’s
beautiful body, just as I am. I feel Cid’s larger hands move to my waist and
circle around to the front of my pants, obviously trying to take them off as he
whispers lustily,
“I think he has the right idea—we have
too many clothes on….” And with that said, he quickly unbuckles my belt and
relieves me of my own offending pants. I can’t help but blush once I’m
completely bare before Cloud and Cid; even though we’ve done this many times
before, I always feel unsure and defenseless before their strong gazes. I know
they love me, but I just feel embarrassed about myself, about my body—that
maybe one time they might finally see what I see and never want to be near me
again…. I don’t think I could survive the rest of my life if that ever
happened—I would die….
I’m torn from my depressing
thoughts though, when I feel two sets of hands on my body—all over me,
surrounding and touching me in the most intimate of ways. I shudder at the
pleasure my two lover’s hands are giving me… my wings shaking with the pleasure
as well, as a pair of hands caress them softly too.
I throw my head back and drop my
mouth in a silent cry when someone wraps their hand around my straining
erection and slowly starts to pump it… another hand reaches up to hold my head
back, laying it against Cid’s shoulder as, I can only assume, Cid’s mouth,
attacks my throat and shoulder with a vengeance. My two lovers soon have me
bucking and crying for more, as they tease me ruthlessly, leaving me on the brink
and holding on before I ever fall over.
In the midst of it all, I growl out
something obscene as Cid and Cloud continue to torture me, a low chuckle and
more playful hands and kisses on me are the only replies I get. Suddenly I feel
a gust of cool air at my back and I realize Cid has left the bed, for what I’m
not sure until I look down to see Cloud’s eyes gazing behind me hungrily. Only
then do I realize that Cid is stripping… before I can turn to watch, Cid is
back in his place behind me, warming my exposed back and touching me again,
only this time, instead of massaging my back or leaving love-marks on my neck,
he bats the hand, I can only guess as Cloud’s, away from my painfully aroused
manhood and covers it with his own lubed hand. I bite back a yelp of surprise
at the shocking change in temperature, but it turns into a moan of pleasure as
Cid starts to stroke me faster and harder, pulling me closer and closer to the
edge.
I let out a pained cry when Cid
abruptly stops and removes his hand from my weeping erection. I glare down at
Cloud for no apparent reason—just because I’m mad Cid stopped, but he just
smiles up at me as I realize I’m being guided towards his secret passage… I
frown for a moment though; I can’t enter him, not when he hasn’t been prepared
yet. I quickly find out though, that yes, he has definitely been prepared as I
enter him completely and smoothly. We both let out deep moans of pleasure—Cloud
at being filled by me and myself from the feeling of my angel’s tight passage
clutching me desperately.
Cid must have prepared him the same
time he prepared my erection….
I let out a sharp gasp as I feel
two slick fingers enter me at once, realizing that it’s now my turn to be
prepared for Cid’s entrance. While he prepares me, I slowly start up a rhythm
with Cloud that Cid will just have to work with; I’m beyond the point of caring
anymore, I need my release so badly. Soon the stimulation of back and front
becomes too much for me and I find my release within Cloud’s passage quickly.
Still pumping within my angel, I
collapse atop his sweat-soaked body, breathing heavily of my recent release. I
feel Cloud wrap his arms around me again and kiss my forehead lovingly as he
continues to buck up against my body and I can tell he is still far from release—he
is holding it back, making it last, as he always does. Just then I feel
something larger and much thicker enter my own passage and grunt in protest at
first, to Cid’s penetration of my sensitive body, but the added stimulation
finds my body coming back to life and my erection twitching for release once
more.
I groan and push myself back up
again, to give myself more leverage to pound into Cloud just as Cid is doing to
me now.
We soon build up a perfect rhythm:
Cid pounding into me as I pull out of Cloud and the same for Cloud and I.
This time I hold out much longer, wanting to wait for Cloud to find his release
first, before I break… so I shakily reach out with my unclawed hand and wrap my
nimble fingers around Cloud’s straining erection, pumping it in time with our
thrusts. As our impending release nears, my body becomes more sensitive by the
second and my wings flutter joyfully, as if having a life of their own… the
sensational pleasure coursing through me overpowering all of my senses and I can
feel Cloud and Cid growing closer as well.
With a few more strokes of my hand,
I have Cloud releasing his essence, with a loud cry of pleasure, into my palm
and on our stomachs heavily. This in turn causes his inner muscles to clench my
arousal painfully and I follow suit, releasing my seed within my panting lover
once more, my wings flying open, straining in their shout of pleasure. The
chain reaction continues and I soon feel Cid filling me with his warm seed,
coating my inner walls thickly. I shudder from the sensation of being filled
and collapse atop Cloud once more, his arms automatically moving to wrap around
me again.
I sigh and reach behind me to find
one of Cid’s hands, when I finally find one still in a death-grip upon my
now-bruised hip, I pull it free and take it before me, lacing our fingers
together as I move to lay beside Cloud instead of crushing him with my weight,
since I am now much heavier with my wings. Cloud protests weakly but curls up
against me once I’ve made myself comfortable beside him, curling the wing I’m
laying upon beneath me, closer to my body so I doesn’t get crushed, and Cid
soon has me spooned up against his front as well.
Now, as we all lay here, our limbs
entwined and our passions spent, I must think about what I could have lost
today… the euphoric bliss and peace forcing me to think on it—understand that
what I have is special and rare. If I had lost myself completely, I would have
lost the two I most love and they in turn, would have lost me. It wouldn’t have
been fair of me to do that to them, I understand that now, and my bout of
selfishness did not win over my love for these two men I lay with now.
I suppose… my life could have
turned out much worse…. I could have been found by someone else, someone like
Sephiroth… or I could have been left to sleep for ever, as Doctor Hojo had
originally intended…. But I wasn’t, I was found and taken in by Cloud and loved
by both these men—given far more love than any beast like me would deserve… but
I have it now and that should be all that matters… I shouldn’t be selfish about
it or angry…. I know now, that I must praise what I get and cherish it with
everything I have, for as long as I must have it because it might not be here
for ever… and if that were to happen, I would surely lose myself completely and
welcome death with open arms.
This is my life now… not some
science lab with a maniacal doctor, or a dark, cold coffin with no hope of
redemption again….
Cloud… and Cid… they are my life now
as is everyone else along for this journey and I will follow them through it to
the end, even if I must live with the monster inside to defeat our foes.
I slowly start to feel myself drift
off to sleep now, Cloud already having succumbed to slumber’s embrace, but
Cid—I know he is still awake, I can feel it… he can’t hide anything from me.
“What are you thinking about…?” I
ask softly, so as not to wake my sleeping angel before me. A chuckle and
tightening of his arms around me signify Cid’s obvious lack of sleep.
“I should be asking you the same
thing…” I smile softly and snuggle back against Cid more.
“I was just thinking about how
lucky I am that all of you found me down there… in that basement…” Cid stiffens
behind me at that—it’s a touchy subject, around any of us… but I’m not afraid
to talk about it now…. Besides, I was the one who was locked in a coffin when
they came along…. I sigh and stretch my
one free wing out so that it is covering all three of us completely; amazingly,
keeping the warmth our bodies are creating inside the small shelter and better
than any blanket would. Once I have my wing situated, I bring Cid’s hand to my
lips and kiss it, then whisper,
“Good night, Cid… I love you……” Cid
sighs behind me and nuzzles my hair affectionately, mumbling his ‘good nights’
and a small ‘love you too’ before falling asleep finally. Smiling, I stay awake
a few moments longer, listening to the many sounds and songs of the night, but
sleep soon finds me and quickly takes me, pulling me into a realm I never
wanted to enter again… until I met Cloud and Cid and the others…. Now, it’s a
welcoming relief……
~owari~
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