Evolution of a Turk

To my reviewer, Jade, who asked a great question -- whether or not Tseng is alive: I know I was kind of elusive about how I wrote that so I can see why you'd wonder. Of course I can't answer the question...but I can tell you you'll have a definite answer at a later point.

You all already know what I'm gonna say, right? That's there's MPREG and bad language! Enjoy. ;)

Disclaimer: The Final Fantasy VII characters, locations, etc. are all property of Square-Enix. I own nothing, I just do this for fun.

*************

"They're not really going to-" Elena began, but cut herself off. She just shook her head and stared in awe as Cid Highwind, Vincent Valentine -- a man she knew from looking through old files to be a former Turk -- and the young girl she'd been strapped to the side of the DaChao with, prepared to face off against Weapon. Weapon...yes, that was what it was called, Elena remembered. The name was fitting. Then again, Monster would've been as well.

"Looks like they are," Rude muttered.

"They'll be slaughtered," Elena said.

Rude shrugged.

"Should we help?"

Rude said nothing, just stood stiffly and watched Weapon, and the fool-hearted trio determined to fight it.

Elena had her answer right there: No.

Somehow, though, Cid, Vincent and Yuffie -- that was her name -- had managed to fend off the creature without any help from the Turks, who'd resolved only to get involved if it looked like either they, or Reno, were in immediate danger.

Things quieted down after that. Weapon had been driven off by Avalanche, it would seem, and the earthquakes stopped as well.

Cloud had miraculously recovered, and he and Tifa left Mideel with his group almost immediately.

Mideel...the place was a mess. There were hundreds missing and dead. People had lost homes, businesses, everything.

But for the Turks, things had almost returned to normal, as odd as they all found it to think of their current situation as normal. Reno was back to grumbling about how things didn't fit him, and how a good romp with Elena would sure make him feel better, and how unfair it was that he had to go all the way across town for his appointments now, as Dr. Harte had been forced to relocate. Elena was passing around swatches and chirping about how it was time for Reno to start thinking about how he wanted to decorate the baby's nursery, while refusing his advances. Rude sat back and watched it all, thinking plenty, but saying little.

Where was this nursery going to be anyway? Reno hadn't even said where he was planning on living after he...yeah. After that. And with Meteor looming over them all...would any of them live that long?

Shin-Ra's cock and bull idea of "let's shoot a rocket full of materia at it!" would never work. It would be great if it did, but there was just no way it would. Especially given that Cloud and his friends had managed to steal some of that materia for themselves, and no doubt, were on the way to stealing the rest of it...

*************

"Heidegger's sending me to Rocket Town," Rude said, gaze downcast.

Reno nodded, filing away the information. "Yeah?" he asked, then quietly added, "He's sending me to Junon."

There was a well-hidden look of concern on Rude's face. "He's what?"

"Yup. Wants me to oversee all that, make sure the huge materia gets to Rocket Town."

"If Cloud finds out the materia's being kept in Junon..."

"He and his buddies'll show up to claim it. I know."

"Still going?"

"I was ordered to, wasn't I?" Reno's answer was loud and clear: he was going to Junon. "They already got the stuff from Corel and Fort Condor. Least that's what I heard."

"Yeah, they did," Rude confirmed.

"Wouldn't be surprised if they came, then."

"It's just you going to Junon?" Rude asked.

"It's just you going to Rocket Town?" was Reno's reply to that.

"Reno."

"Ah, I'll have a couple of SOLDIER wannabes to boss around, I'm sure," Reno remarked.

"And when one of them opens his mouth and asks why a beanpole like you has a potbelly?" Rude asked, sounding almost as if he was trying to piss Reno off.

"I'll shock the living shit out of him." Reno replied to Rude's question in the same manner in which it was posed: with intentions to irritate.

"Is that your answer to everything?" Rude asked, thinking back to just how many times Reno had gone for his electro-mag-rod over trivial things in the past few months.

Reno stood up swiftly, snorting at Rude as he did. "I hope you get your ass beat," he hissed, his eyes mere slivers. He turned for the door, looking back as he reached the doorway to tell Rude, "Since you think I'm some kind of fucking... oh, whatever the word is. Since you think I'm so fucking helpless."

*************

"You'll be careful?" Elena asked, for what seemed like the millionth time.

"Careful as a Turk can be," was Reno's somewhat smug response.

Elena pouted. "I hope that's good enough." She paused. "You'll call me the second you get there?"

"Affirmative."

At that, Elena smiled slightly and leaned in for a hug. She'd leaned in a little closer than Reno would've liked, her svelte frame pressed tightly against him. He'd tried to back his way out of the hug, or at least put some distance between her body and certain parts of his. But it was all in vain, as Elena seemed intent on closing any and all space between them, to the point that he just gave up and figured he'd better let her get it out of her system. He didn't want to end up in an argument with her too, not when he had to leave. He certainly didn't want a repeat of what had happened with Rude. He felt bad about lashing out at his partner like that. What was wrong with him? He never used to feel bad about being a jerk. Most of the time he liked it. Damn hormones.

Elena had a hand on each of Reno's shoulder blades, and her fingertips just peeking over the top of his shoulders, her bust right in line with his "potbelly," to quote Rude. He let out a groan when he felt the kick and she gasped. They backed away from one another, and Elena eyed Reno curiously, both her eyes and her hands drawn immediately to his stomach.

"Do you- do you mind if I...?" she stammered.

"You already are. Guess not."

"Do you feel that a lot?" she asked, eyes still fixed on her hands, thinking of the feel of the fabric against her skin, and all that was beyond it.

"Feel it enough."

Elena squealed suddenly, unaware that Reno was rolling his eyes at her overexcited attitude. "It- it moved again!"

Reno just nodded.

"Of course, you knew that," Elena said, with a pout, feeling stupid.

Reno nodded once more. "It's not that-"

Elena proceeded to hug Reno again, more specifically, his stomach.

"...special."

Elena looked up at Reno as best she could from her position. "Shut up. It is too."

"You know, it can hear you."

"I-" Elena stammered.

"Can't it? Isn't that why you're always on my ass to stop cussing so much?"

"Yes, that's precisely why." Elena gave Reno a sour look. "I wasn't telling you to shut up. I was telling him to shut up." She tried to explain herself to his unborn offspring.

Reno put a hand to his forehead. Great, now she's talking to it, he thought. Never should've opened my mouth. "Elena, I kind of need to get going now," he finally said, still stuck in her grasp. "So you kind of need to let go of me."

Elena backed away. She was flushed, and smiling from ear to ear.

"Oh, hell. Wipe that damn grin off your face already."

"Sorry," she apologized, doing her best to restrain herself. "I wish you weren't going."

Reno gave a little 'same here' eyebrow raise. "Yeah, well, orders."

"Yeah, orders," she softly echoed. "I wish you could stay, at least until Rude gets back."

"That's on him. He wants to stay out all night, that's his business. He's a grown man."

"Of course. But why would he do it now? He knew you were leaving today."

"You just answered your own question. I was kinda an asshole the last time we talked," Reno told her. "Look, I really have to go."

Elena nodded her agreement, and offered up a sad smile. She watched Reno all the way to the car, and the car all the way to the street corner, waiting several minutes before she finally went back inside.

*************

"I don't like you. I don't want you," Reno insisted, looking down. "You're nothing but a mooch. And a pain in my ass. And my back, too. And why the hell am I talking to you anyway? Damn Elena. She likes you so much, she can have you. That's it. I'm pushing you off on her. Ugh. And quit kicking me!"

The elevator came to a stop and as the doors opened, Reno shook his head and sighed. Time to get to work. He really didn't want to be there, on assignment -- a solo assignment, no less -- in his state, but there was no going back now. He might as well see it through. Besides, it beat standing in an elevator, talking to your stomach.

Reno was immediately greeted with two salutes, and an over-eager and perfectly synchronized, "Sir!"

"Yeah yeah," he muttered, slouching. It certainly didn't help his back, which had been bothering him lately, but it did enough to conceal his ever-growing bulge. "Go help load, I gotta make a call," he instructed them. He was quick to pull out his PHS and get Elena on the phone.

"This is Elena."

"Hey, Elena."

"Are you alright?" she asked, immediately.

"Geez, already with that shit," Reno grumbled.

"Of course. Now answer the question."

"I'm fine. Just waiting for them to get the shit loaded onto the sub."

"Them?" Elena repeated.

"Couple of SOLDIER trainees."

"They haven't said anything, have they?"

"Not a word. Don't think you can really tell if I slouch," Reno explained, hoping, as he did and said it, that it was true. "I just look a little...I dunno, tubby."

"Reno, you shouldn't slouch. That's not good for your back. You'll get sore."

"Already am sore. Hey, I gotta go. Think my flunkies are coming up behind me. Later." Reno hung up his phone suddenly, and without even turning, said, "What are you doing? Help load." He put his phone back in his pocket and turned around, prepared to scold the two SOLDIERs, for seemingly ignoring their superior. He'd told them to do something, and they hadn't said a single word. It wasn't like them...they'd been so annoyingly eager just a short while earlier. "Cloud?"

"Either give it to us or else," Cloud said, frigidly. "Which is it gonna be?"

"Unfortunately, I don't have time to deal with you," Reno said, calmly. "My priority is the huge materia." He turned and walked away. He was practically stunned into good posture by his overzealous charges, as they both flanked him, loudly informing him that the huge materia had been loaded onto the submarine.

"Good. I have another job for you both," he told them. With his thumb, he pointed over his shoulder, at Cloud, telling the two SOLDIER hopefuls, "Kick his ass," and continuing on his way.

He pretended not to hear Highwind shouting, "Fight your own fucking battles, you fucking pansy!"

Just for that...Reno thought to himself, with a chuckle. Under different circumstances, he could almost see himself being friends with the ever-swearing ex-Shin-Ra pilot, but under these circumstances...yeah, just for that...

Reno had been to the Underwater Reactor numerous times, mostly acting as an escort. He knew the layout of the facility, as well as the machinery. He remembered his last visit; Scarlet was beaming as she unveiled an altogether bizarre contraption she called "Carry Armor." A giant, two-armed crane, to be exact. Both of those arms could operate either together, or independently from one another, depending on the task. It was assured to reduce both cargo loading time and the number of workers on Shin-Ra's payroll.

Scarlet had loads of facts and figures on the thing, and what a revolutionary piece of machinery it was, but Reno wasn't so concerned with the specifics. Could he program it to attack Cloud? That was what he wanted to know, and was aiming to find out. At the very least, he was sure he could use the thing to buy himself some time.

Reno was chuckling to himself as he rode the elevator back to the surface. He could still picture those ridiculously wide mako eyes, as Cloud assumed his fighting stance, and he could still hear Cid's tirade. "What the fuck's the matter with you, Turk?! Don't have the balls to fight fair?! I'll beat the tar outta these two little pricks, scrap this piece of shit, then I got your number! I'll ram this spear so far up your-" That was when the lift doors had shut, cutting Cid off, mid-rant. Reno could guess what his next word had been.

"And Elena says I cuss too much," he said, softly, glancing downward. Realizing he was talking to it again, he cursed, "Son of a fucking-" He shook his head and smirked, "What do you know, I do cuss too much."

Reno was glad Elena wasn't there. She'd be all too thrilled to see him acknowledging it. Oh yeah, Reno was damn glad Elena wasn't there. Even more, though, he was thankful Rude wasn't around. Rude...Reno still felt a pang of guilt over his last conversation with the big man, and how he'd snapped at him when all he'd really done was show concern. Why did it bother him so much? They were partners. They were friends. He should've been happy someone was looking out for him; thinking of him. Just meant he was worried about him. But Rude, worried about him? It was weird. It was just plain weird. Still...

Reno pulled out his PHS once again and called a number that was obviously very accessible. "How's life in Rocket Town?" he asked, simply.

"Ready for launch at anytime," Rude replied.

"Yeah, well, the shit's on the way."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Piece of cake."

"Yeah?" Rude asked, his tone changing slightly. He was glad Reno's mission seemed to have gone off without a hitch.

"Yeah," Reno confirmed. "See you back in Mideel then, huh?"

"Yeah."

The two men ended their phone conversation.

*************

It was after midnight when Rude arrived in Mideel. He was tired, his knuckles were a lovely shade of purple, and his ribs hurt, among other things. He'd have fun reporting to Heidegger on how Cloud had managed to get away from the Turks yet again. There would be no making the man understand. Elena would understand. Reno would understand. Sure, he'd talk plenty of shit, but he'd understand. He'd understand better than anyone, after facing off against Avalanche three-against-one.

That, Rude realized, was what had started it all. If it hadn't been for that, Reno never would've been near enough to Hojo, or if he was, well, he'd have beaten the hell out of the crazy bastard for so much as trying to lay a finger on him. Something Hojo never even would've tried if Avalanche hadn't fucked Reno up, then stormed the Shin-Ra building to spring their friend free. No, none of it would've happened. Hojo'd still have the Ancient to poke and prod and inject and play God with. She'd be in a room somewhere, having kittens or whatever. Rude wasn't entirely sure what RedXIII was, after all. And he and Reno would be completely removed from the situation, off at a bar, knocking back a shot, or maybe shooting a game of pool.

There was a gentle humming, accompanied by a quick tapping sound as Rude unlocked the door and stepped inside the beach house. It took him a moment to place the sound, or rather, the device it emanated from: a sewing machine. He rolled his eyes and chuckled a little. He took the sound to mean that Elena had decided to try her hand at making baby clothes. Rude almost wished he'd have been there to see Reno's reaction to it all. He was probably in bed now, though. It was pretty late after all.

Rude was stopped dead in his tracks by the sight of the person at the table; it wasn't Elena, it was Reno. He had a bottle of soda to the side of the sewing machine. Rude was surprised Elena would allow it. She'd set strict rules about the amount of caffeine Reno was to consume. Her claim had been, "It's a drug, you know."

Rude recognized the shirt Reno was wearing: loose, dark gray, cotton, casual, with three buttons. Yeah, he recognized it -- it was his. The sleeves were way too long for Reno, but it was a decent fit around his midsection, a little snug, even. Rude only allowed himself a fleeting look; he didn't feel like getting caught gawking again.

The redhead casually glanced up from the sewing machine and over at the doorway, lifting his foot from the pedal as he did. "Lemme guess, they got away from you."

Rude said nothing, just raised an eyebrow at Reno. He'd much rather talk about Reno's little adventure in home economics than his failed mission -- anything but that, really. Trying to change the subject he asked, "Where's Elena?"

"Bed, I think. Pretty late, you know."

"So why are you up?" Rude asked, slowly approaching Reno.

"Can't sleep."

"And you decided to sew?"

"Blow me. Nah, Elena and I found this thing in the attic, behind a bunch of shit. Dragged it down here. Now she thinks she's gonna make baby clothes." Reno paused and laughed a little. "Doesn't know the first thing about sewing."

"And you do?" Rude retorted, more to get a rise out of Reno than anything. Clearly, he did know what he was doing. Or he was doing an excellent job of faking it. Or maybe he was just that quick of a learner.

Reno merely returned to his task, choosing not to respond to Rude.

"You dragged this down here?"

"Doesn't weigh that much."

Rude sighed. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Hemming up your pants."

"My pants need hemming?"

"Yup."

"Why?"

"They're too long on me."

Rude pinched the bridge of his nose. He was so tired it was almost funny, though. Frustrating, as he was now out however many pairs of pants, but funny. Watching Reno stop the sewing machine and set aside a pair of his best navy blue trousers, then immediately grab at another pair and mercilessly cut several inches of material from both legs, he asked, "Did you leave me any pants?"

Reno glanced up from his task and over at Rude, but didn't answer his question. Instead he asked, "Turning in?"

"Yeah, probably. When‘d you get back?"

Reno just shrugged and resumed sewing. “Day before yesterday.” For a moment the hum and tap of the sewing machine was the only sound in the room, until Reno piped up and said, "All that shit I said before I left..."

"Don't worry about it. Water under the bridge. We're cool."

"Okay. We're cool."

"So why couldn't you sleep?"

Reno shrugged the question off. He took his time before deciding to say anything. "Get your ass to bed and we can talk about it later."

*************

“Did he seem alright when he got back?” Rude asked Elena, when he was finally able to pull her aside.

“You were worried too?” she wondered, seeming almost gleeful at the prospect.

Rude stonewalled her.

“Oh, fine. Don’t admit to anything. Of course he seemed fine. He always does.”

Rude’s blank look assumed the form of a deep drown.

“He was cleared by the doctor. I hauled him there almost immediately. Baby's well and kicking!" Elena beamed. Her demeanor told Rude she was speaking from experience, though he found it odd Reno would let her touch him. Continuing where'd she'd left off, Elena added, "He's still a little underweight, but other than that he’s perfectly fine. We’d all like it if he put on some more weight. Well, almost all of us. Reno can be a little vain sometimes, can‘t he?”

Rude thought of his pants. “A little?”

*************

A/N: I know the end of this one is a little weak, and a better author would've been able to scrap the last scene, but I just didn't want to part with it, silly as it seems. Now what did you guys think? That's what I really wanna know. ;)