Becoming SOLDIER

Zack frowned as he observed his blonde friend. Something was really off about him yet Cloud didn’t indulge his curiosity. Instead Zack was brushed off with a simple dismissive wave of the hand and a quick ‘I’m fine; just tired’ response.

Zack’s lips pressed together as he tapped his pencil eraser against the desk holding his chin up with his opposite hand as he continued to stare. The more he looked to the blonde the more he noticed the boy’s uncomfortable shifting and exhausted expression. What was Cloud not telling him? He wasn’t just tired; that much was obvious. Zack would have to be blind not to notice. And his eyes…

Zack knew he had caught a glimpse of some sort of emotional torment; something danced in his friend’s blue green orbs and he wanted answers. He needed to know what could’ve changed to make Cloud’s eyes become so hollow and empty; it was frightening to Zack. Never before had he witnessed such a void in the blonde’s eyes; not once.

Zack winced and blinked as a quick thud was produced on the top of his head; he quickly reached up to the abused area and looked sideways to see just what he had been hit with. Zack smiled sheepishly as his eyes trailed from the offending ‘weapon’, a clipboard, to the instructor who towered over his desk.

“Cadet Fair; if you have any aspiration to make it in to SOLDIER you will need to complete the written exam. I suggest you finish your test,” the instructor’s annoyed hushed tone made the sheepish grin grow wider on Zack’s face.

“Sir yes Sir; Sorry sir, it won’t happen again,” Zack stated firmly though the instructor gave him a exasperated look.

“Just finish your exam Cadet Fair…,” The instructor sighed as he moved along.

Zack’s smile soon faded as the man walked away and his eyes trailed back to Cloud; I hope it’s just my imagination… Maybe he really is just tired…

The written exam was little more than a joke to Cloud; he knew everything and quickly worked through each section. There were no concerns about this part of the test; he knew he would pass without fail. It was the physical test that had him worried. He tried to ignore the pain enveloping his body but that, unfortunately, he was failing miserably at. The simple act of sitting was painful enough but walking, let alone running….

He shifted to his other side on the seat trying not to sit directly on his butt; really it was excruciating and trying to hide the limp was even worse. He was forced to walk straight so as to not attract any attention but in doing so made it even more painful. He had to fight off the tears he wanted so desperately to shed as he felt the torn skin pull and the now familiar jolt of pain rise up his spine. The pain itself felt as though his backbone was caving in on itself. Cloud scoffed the description of the pain; it’s more like shitting out your fucking spine… Cloud turned his attention back to his test. Just concentrate; I need to focus if I want to get through the physical exam… It’s going to take everything I have.

Cloud felt his pride well up inside him; he wouldn’t let this “handicap” stop him. He was going to become a SOLDIER; he was going to prove them wrong. I can do this…I’ll be SOLDIER…

Within another hour the group was told to put there pencils down which signaled the end of the test. Cloud allowed a weak smile as he was already finished before they collected the tests; he was just one step closer. There was no way he was giving up now; looking back towards Zack he slightly raised his forearm with a small fist. Once Zack returned the gesture from his seat with a large grin he knew Zack had done just as well.

“Alright Cadets; you get Lunch than meet at the training grounds! You have an hour if your late you will fail,” The loud voice made a few jump; Cloud was however thankful he could have time to ready himself for the next part of their exam. He slowly pushed himself out from his seat and bite the back of his lip at the pain of his sore muscles contracting. Cloud wondered if he had even a speck of pale skin left under the black and blue tinted skin. A strong hand patted his back a couple times, “You aced it too huh Spike!”

The innocent gesture made every muscle tense and thus become even more painful; the small slaps felt like fire torching his abused skin. Cloud had fight the painful cry bellowing in his throat; he forced himself to silently scream before turning back to Zack. The only indication of pain he sported was his slightly tensed brows with went unnoticed by the raven haired man, “Yeah; I think so…”

Zack raised a brow, “You think? Geez; you really must be out of it Spiky,” Zack tried to nonchalantly get his friend to speak, yet failed.

Cloud snorted, “Hn,” Cloud smiled softly somewhat pleading, “I need something to drink.” The simple act of speaking was now aggravating Cloud; his voice was slightly rasped and masking it was no easy feet. It was painful as hell; the less he talked, he decided, the better. Which would be quite difficult around Zack. He knew the boy was rarely silent and because of this exam the raven haired cadet would probably babble on endlessly. Cloud just prayed he babbled on and didn’t ask to many questions.

“Sure buddy; let’s head to the chow hall and get some food too. I’m starved,” he annunciated the word “Starved“ as if he hadn‘t been fed in years. Cloud weakly smiled and nodded gesturing for Zack to led the way; he didn’t want to chance walking in front of Zack. This way if he happened to slip a step it would go unnoticed by the cadet and he if noticed he could play it off as pure clumsiness or nerves.

The walk to the cafeteria and the break in between the written and physical exam was running by all to quickly. And to make matters worse Cloud was subject to a few amused stares by Ralph and his group. Cloud assumed he’d feel fear and terror at seeing his attackers; but he couldn’t be more wrong. Instead a deep rage was stirring in his gut. His fists were held tightly at his sides and his eyes glared dangerously at the offenders. The chilled glare caught the eyes of Zack who in turn raised a brow; sure the group was on Cloud’s and his own “people I’d love to beat the living shit out of” bingo book but the look Cloud was giving them…. It made Zack want to shiver; there was a malice in Cloud’s eyes; much like the hollow and empty expression he had seen earlier; that he had never witnessed in the blonde’s eyes.

Zack turned his attention to Cloud, “Cloud…?”

Zack’s worried voice didn’t catch Cloud’s ears until the third or fourth time the boy had spoken his name and by than when Cloud’s eyes met Zack’s he saw the question and concern focused on him. Cloud forced a small smile and shook his head; he didn’t want to speak, and more importantly didn’t want to talk about ‘that’. So instead he brushed Zack off with a swig of his drink and a casual wave of dismissal, “Nothing…”

Zack quirked a brow but didn’t argue further; he knew his friend wouldn’t budge. Besides there was no point in starting an argument before the next part of the exam. He would have to be patient and talk to Cloud about it later.

As the cadet’s filed in for the next part of the exam Cloud felt his nerves starting to get the best of him. He was anxious; and worried. Scared because he knew he couldn’t perform to his best ability and frightened on how much of a hindrance his sore and injured body would become. His entire body ached against the fresh and old bruises and welt he sported; thankfully they left any skin visible past the Shinra issued uniforms untouched. He doubted he could have came up with valid reasons for yet another glowing set of welts. Not only were the bruises and welts making his muscles ache and cry anytime he forced them to move; thus stretching and pulling the battered tissue; but the pain that constantly shot up and down his spine with each step and the sting of the open and split skin still tore on his lower half was making any movement a feat in itself. Cloud’s teeth ground together as his jaw was set tight; all that doesn’t matter… He reminded himself; I can do this; I won’t fail!

Each cadet was ordered to proceed forward to select a practice sword for the exam as they were explained how the exam would be performed. To their understanding they would be summoned individually to battle a monster and dependent on their performance they would be graded by a small console of members. Than they would be evaluated through a physical examination to test every physical aspect of the cadet’s talents, abilities, and limits. The average grade would determine; along with the grade from their written exam; whether or not said cadet was ready for SOLDIER.

Cloud took in a deep breath and smiled as Zack mouthed the words ‘good luck’. Cloud repeated the words after a curt nod and lowered his gaze to the sword in his hands. He was still a little shaky but he knew he wouldn’t allow this to deter him. He wouldn’t allow his condition get the best of him; he would rise above this challenge and any others that they placed in front of him. He… no They would become SOLDIER together.

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