Snakes and Snails

Men and Agreements
Like Weiss on Rice

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“Marianne!”

Marianne flinched at his name, and turned around to glare at him. Why did he always have to use his first name out in public? It was humiliating! Well, no one was around to hear it, but still… “What?!”

“You don’t have to yell!” Weiss called back, finally walking up to him.

“You yelled first you brat!” Mari growled, sometimes he had to wonder how he could tell it was him. When everyone was in uniform they practically looked the same. Maybe it was his height and darker skin tone that gave him away. Who knew?

“I’m not a brat!” He pouted.

“You’re a brat if I say you’re a brat!” He tweaked Weiss’ nose and he made a show of looking hurt. “What do you want?”

“I’m hungry.”

Restrictor just glared at him, of course Weiss couldn’t see that through his mask. “Then why don’t you go home and make yourself something to eat?”

“I do that all the time.” Weiss laughed.

He just stared at him for a moment. What in the hell? “Then go bother your mother, I’m sure she’ll make something for you!”

“She’s busy.”

He glared at him. “Then go get something to eat!”

“But I’ll be lonely… and I’m poor.”

He stopped short at that. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Weiss was suddenly hanging on his arm and looking quite tearful. “Go with me and get me something to eat!” He begged.

“Inviting yourself to eat out on my dime? How very generous of you.” Restrictor was about to turn away from him before Weiss grabbed his arm more firmly.

“Don’t be so mean! You’re a solider! You make lots of money and I’m just a poor high school student!”

“Didn’t you just graduate?” He gave him a pointed look.

“Poor starving artist?” He laughed.

Well, he was sort of hungry himself. And admittedly the company wouldn’t be so bad for a change. That and he might earn points with the old man if he was nice to his son. Not that he needed an incentive. He rather liked Weiss when he wasn’t being completely annoying. Well, that might be an understatement, but he wouldn’t admit that to himself least of all anyone else. “Where do you want to go?”

Weiss made a pleased sound, knowing he just got what he wanted. “I want to go to somewhere nice.” He plopped down on the nearest table.

He knew it was too good to be true. He put his hand on his hip.

“Don’t look at me like that!” Somehow he knew Mari’s eyebrow was twitching right now somewhere under there. “I know they pay your room and board here! Take me somewhere nice!” He poked him with his shoe.

He was really starting to aggravate him. “And where might that be?”

“I want to go to that café down the block from the Shinra building. You know the one with the white and yellow umbrellas on the tables?”

That was his idea of a nice place? Then again he was still just a kid. He was being let off easy so he would agree to it without a word. “Alright.”

“I want a coffee.”

“You’re mother should have spanked you more… you are spoiled and obnoxious.” Restrictor said without hesitation.

“I know, but you love me?”

Thank God he was wearing his helm because he was smiling like an idiot for some reason or another. But he knew why, secretly. “Hmph!”

“Oh, ‘hmph yourself’ and let’s go!”

“Can you give me a half second?” That aggravation! He pulled off his helm and ran his hand through his wavy hair.

“You are going to go like that?”

“I’m in uniform… I’ll get a discount.”

“You’re cheap.” Weiss laughed, just knowing it would get under his skin.

“I’m cheap?” He was about to start a tirade, Weiss couldn’t help the smile from forming on his mouth. “I’m cheap?! You little brat… you just walk right in here demanding expensive lunches and you dare call me cheap? Go home and make yourself some ramen!”

“Noooo…” Weiss whined. “I’m getting all anemic. You don’t want to be responsible for me getting sick do you?”

“Oh please, don’t even start that crap with me. I know you’re pale because you stay out of the sun all the time. Anemia…” He rumbled, looking away. But he didn’t move away so Weiss knew he still had a chance.

“I’m sorry Restrictor-san.”

“Oh, Restrictor-san is it? It’s always Mari this and Mari that… but when you want something it’s ‘Restrictor-san’.” He intoned the trying-to-be-cute voice Weiss used earlier and the younger man laughed. “Well not this time brat.”

“But I said I was sorry!” Weiss whimpered. “And I’m starving…”

“You’re not starving.” He was being so dramatic.

“I’m dying!”

“You and your brother. The most annoying children on the planet. Period.” Restrictor growled, walking out the door. “You coming or not?”

Weiss jumped off of the table and followed after him.

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“Get off of my arm, people are going to think we’re together.” Restrictor grumbled, trying not too hard to dislodge the stupid boy from his upper arm.

“Well won’t that be nice? You’ll have people see a cute boy on your arm and they’ll think you’re a stud.”

“Stud?” Restrictor repeated, that sounded so embarrassing he couldn’t even begin to explain it.

“Then when they see you alone you can tell them that I broke your heart and they’ll be all too willing to comfort you. Think of it as payment for getting me lunch.”

“You are a special boy, you know that don’t you?” Restrictor laughed.

“Of course!” Weiss saw the café and once again made a pleased noise.

“Getting all excited about food?”

“I told you I was hungry!” Weiss laughed, when they were closer he looked up at Mari. “You sit down, I’ll go in and tell them we’re here.” And he left him there.

Mari sat down as he was requested and looked up at the sky, ugh. Not much to look at but pollution and a giant plate. He really hated going above ground… and he would have hated it even more if he had to live out in town. He didn’t know how Mr. Z could stand it.

He remembered the town his mother brought him up at, where his father still lived. He really liked that place despite the company he kept. No one really wanted to move to the city… but it seemed like all roads led here.

Mr. Z had long since moved his family out of the facility into their own place. He hadn’t wanted to live down there, not since Hojo had been in charge and almost kept them prisoner. He could understand, both of his daughters were sacrificed and Leda would have more than likely died because of the experiments they planned for Nero. He saw the boy’s file and it was quite frightening to say the least what they hypothesized he might be able to do.

Hojo, that slimy bastard, was still part of Shrina despite it all. What’s worse was the scientist was still a little peeved about being thrown out of Deep Ground. After some deliberation Zeus and the President had come to an agreement, not by force of course, but the old man used diplomacy. They got to keep their medical research facility while Hojo worked his mad science in some other lab.

“Whatcha thinking about Mari?” Weiss spoke directly into his ear and he winced away from it. Obviously it tickled him.

“Don’t you or your father know it’s not nice to breath in people’s ears?!” Both of them… they seemed to enjoy torturing him. It seemed like both of them had secrets or wanted to whisper something to him and it drove him crazy.

“Yeah, but we do it because we know it bugs you.” Weiss sat down next to him rather than across the table.

They chit chatted a little about this and that. How was the family doing, how was his mom doing now? Weiss and his family were rather attached to his mother and they worried about her missing her daughter. She was doing well, sometimes it hit her that she wouldn’t get to see her again, but she was healing.

After they ordered their meal and their family pleasantries conversation winded down there was an unhealthy amount of uncomfortable silence while they waited for their food. Weiss had seemed so eager be with him and talk just a moment ago… now he seemed a little distracted and not at all interested in speaking.

Restrictor Marianne frowned. He thought they were going out to have a nice lunch, but ever since the waitress sat Weiss’ coffee down he had been glaring at it like it had wronged him in someway.

“What the hell is the matter with you?” Mari grumbled finally.

Weiss’ face softened somewhat when he realized he had been scowling. “Mari, can I tell you something?”

“Is that why you brought me out here?” He wondered.

“Yeah, no one will listen to me about it.” Weiss mumbled, stirring creamer into his coffee.

Oh God, not only was he paying for lunch but playing his personal psychologist too? Well… it’s not like he really minded. And Weiss was talking to him about something important right? It was almost flattering. Almost.

“My dad is being a bastard!” Weiss huffed suddenly. “He’s not going to help me go to college.”

The boy was lucky to have a father like Zeus, at least he didn’t have his dad… ugh. But he wasn’t going to say that just yet, if he did Weiss might close off and not tell him anything. “Why not?”

“It’s because he wants me to go into Solider!” Weiss growled. “He says he’s not going to pay for me to go to art school! I don’t want to go into Solider and he thinks if he backs me into a corner that I’ll do it!”

That was easily remedied. “Why don’t you just apply for scholarships?”

“I wasn’t as smart as you and Nero, Mari… I screwed around a lot in high school and got horrible grades.”

Mari didn’t know that and frowned, he couldn’t help but be disappointed. “How did you graduate?”

“Tests.” Weis sighed. “I went for my GED… I just didn’t want to bother with High School anymore. There wasn’t any challenge to it and it was boring.”

Of all the half brained excuses! “That’s not a good reason.”

“I know.” Weiss said impatiently. “But I’ve already screwed everything up and my GPA is down really low. It doesn’t count against me in college but it’ll definitely keep me from getting a scholarship. It’ll be impossible for me to get a loan right now with all the crap going on with the economy no thanks to…” Shinra, he wanted to say but decided to end it right there. There was no point in telling Mari that since he worked for that company after all. Plus it might offend him. “Well, you know. I’m young and I don’t have any credit. I told dad I would work while I was going to school and give him the money back. He said it won’t be enough though.”

“Shouldn’t it?” Marianne asked. “Tuition isn’t that much and if you’re living with your family…”

“My dad said if I go I’ll have to live in a dorm and pay for my own food. Which will cost even more that I don’t have. Besides that, he’s not going to help me take a loan out even then.” Weiss was getting increasingly frustrated. “Like I said, he wants to give me no choice. I love my dad and all, but he really wants me to go in and he’s being a bastard about it.”

“I agree with you for once, someone as pathetically undisciplined as you should never become a solider.” Marianne ribbed him.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Weiss growled at him. “I’ve got all kinds of discipline doing the things I like to do! I work on my technique all the time! So there! I also attend and help coordinate art shows! So don’t take his side!”

That’s the kind of passion he was looking for. “I wasn’t.”

“Good! Because I don’t need you, mom and dad yelling at me for doing something “useless” with my life.” Weiss huffed.

“Art isn’t useless…” Marianne said solemnly and Weiss looked up at him with a smile on his face… he couldn’t help but tease. “It makes good kindling.”

“Mari!” Weiss wailed.

“I kid, I think it’s important. My sister enjoyed it herself and she came up with some pretty things. I framed some of her things on my walls at home.”

Weiss couldn’t help but realize that Marianne was talking to him like an adult for once… and it felt good. He was also talking about his sister again. She just died this year due to some hereditary illness. It mostly only affected women but Mari had gotten blood work just in case. His mother too. It was negative to the both of their relief. Their sister and child died though, and they had been grieving for quite a while. When her time came Mari got impossibly drunk. It was the only time Weiss had ever seen Mari naked (metaphorically speaking of course) and vulnerable.

“Why don’t you stay with me?” Mari said suddenly.

Weiss cranked his neck around and looked at him as if he had just grown a horn or something. “What do you mean?”

Oh he knew what sort of confusion would come about. It was only natural considering the boy had the most perverted father on the face of the planet. He was sure he had teased Weiss that he needed to beware of Mari lest he work his charismatic whiles on him. Which Weiss would always laugh to and tell him “Dad, I’m a kid… you know Mari doesn’t like me!” Foolish boy.

Mari shook his head. “You need a place to stay don’t you? I have a spare room… you could put your bed in there.”

“Mari…” Weiss was a little overwhelmed by his offer. No one in his family was really standing up for him right now… and the situation looked utterly hopeless for him to ever get into school… and the one person he least suspected would listen to him much less take him seriously offered him a place to stay without a moment’s hesitation. It meant a lot. “You mean it?”

Mari nodded. “I could even give you money for tuition.”

“I can work and pay you back.” Weiss said eagerly, not believing for a second that this was really happening.

“You won’t need to do that, because in return I want a few favors.”

Weiss flushed at that. What did he mean? His brain went strait to sex again. That had to be it. He… he was sort of glad. He was hoping that Mari would notice him sometime. It wasn’t exactly how he pictured them being together, not in exchange for any financial gain that was for sure, but it was still Mari after all… and…

“What are you blushing for?” Mari grabbed his cheeks and pulled them, breaking him out of his thoughts. “You’re getting a little excited for a little kid don’t you think?” He let them snap back into place and Weiss rubbed his face painfully. “You’ll be my live in maid and cook… in exchange for your room and board.”

“You just want me to cook and clean for you?” He hoped he didn’t sound disappointed.

He hadn’t. “Of course. I think it’s a fair exchange. I can’t cook and I could use the money I save from eating out to help you.” And have a little left over actually… he looked at his expenses and he spent more money on food than he did anything else. “Not to mention I hate cleaning… you can do that.”

Weiss nodded in agreement, trying to force down that smile that was erupting across his face. “If… if you mean it?”

“Sure.” He looked at him so hopefully he couldn’t help but grin himself. “See me after my shift ends and we’ll work it out.”

He tried not to ask too eagerly. “When do you get home?”

“Twelve.”

It was a little past two in the afternoon… “When did your shift start?”

“Just a couple hours ago.” Marianne smiled at his look.

“You work twelve hour shifts?!” Weiss screeched.

The boy did yell a lot. “Don’t you work on your paintings and statues that long?”

“Well, yeah… but that’s fun to do.”

“Well, what I do is fun to me. So get used to it.”

“Okay.” Weiss’ voice told him ‘If you are sure about that.’ “I’ll tell my dad I’m spending the night and then you can tell me everything. Mom won’t like it if I’m out that late and try to come home.” He flipped out his phone and pushed a number and set it to his ear.

The boy was eighteen years old for goodness sake! They couldn’t keep him from staying out! Of course he became independent of his mother and father a lot sooner.
Mari realized suddenly who Weiss was about to talk to…Oh dear… He was about to protest when he hear Zeus’ voice on the other line.
“Hey dad, I’m spending the night with Mari tonight.” A grumbled response. “I’ll probably sleep on the couch.” Another murmur. “I don’t usually sleep on my back, why?” Zeus laughed. “What?! No!” Weiss gave Marianne a nervous look suddenly and the older man couldn’t imagine what his father was telling him. “Dad, just shut up! He’s not going to do that!” He huffed. “Dad, I’m a guy too and I don’t only want one thing.” He sighed. “Stop treating me like a girl! I’m spending the night with Mari! Make sure you tell mom this time so she doesn’t have a heart attack waiting up for me. Yeah… thanks.” He rolled his eyes. “I love you too. Bye.” Weiss turned around to Mari, which almost had a flabbergasted look on his face. “I can stay the night.” He smiled.

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“What did your old man say earlier?” It had been bugging Marianne all day long. He unlocked the door, and being the gentleman his mother forced him to be, he let his guest in first.

“I don’t remember, just his usual perverted stuff.” Weiss laughed, walking into his apartment. “He’s an idiot. He keeps saying stuff like you want me.” He tisked, as if that would ever happen. “I keep telling him you only like older people anyway.” He looked at him seriously then. “Right Mari?”

“It depends on what you mean by older?” Mari asked worriedly, motioning him to sit at the table with him.

“You know, old… like you?” Weiss said innocently, once against sitting in the seat closest to Mari.

A low blow… but he didn’t mean it that way so he wouldn’t take it like that. “They don’t have to be my age… it’s not like I’m as old as you are.” He was silently grateful too. He hated those teenage years when people a few years younger than you were suddenly too young and people a few years older than you were way too old.

“You must date a lot.” Weiss blurted. “I won’t get in the way while I’m here.”

That was kind of cute in a horrible sort of way. He could imagine trying to explain to a lover why he had an eighteen year old boy living with him. “I don’t… date a lot.” He said with some difficulty.

“Why not? You look really good.”

That made him feel a little better after the ‘you’re old’ comment. “I guess.”

“You are… so why don’t you date a lot?” Weiss asked. “I did when I was in high school.”

“Oh really?” Mari had a mischievous grin on his face. “Get anywhere with them?”

“Mari! You sound like my dad!” Weiss laughed, smacking the table. “No! I didn’t date anyone long enough. Besides, they were all girls and… you know.”

Did he ever! It not that he didn’t like women, it’s just he felt he could only date them when he was living at home. His father would have killed him otherwise. “Yeah.”

“It was for dad really. I know he wouldn’t hate me or disown me, but he’s weird about it still.”

“You’re telling me!” Mari laughed. “I’ve had to deal with his crap since you were in diapers.”

Weiss thought about that. Mari hadn’t been that old when he joined the military, maybe fifteen. And before that, when he was born Mari was already in college… he was some weird prodigy.

Weiss didn’t know why, but that last sentence Mari uttered made the older man feel somehow unattainable. He was always calling him ‘boy’, ‘brat’ or ‘baby’ or some other stupid childish name. Then again, he probably thought he was a child… and stupid after he told him how he messed around in high school. If he had gone the route Mari went in he would have already been in the military for three years! He couldn’t imagine it! Marianne had been more grown up even at his age.

“Maybe you should date a man.” Mari said suddenly.

“Huh?” Weiss snapped back into reality. Had Mari been talking this whole time?

“A man? Maybe you should date a few men while you are in college.”

“Uh? Oh!” Weiss laughed, feeling even more stupid than before.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice you zoning out over there.” Mari looked at him. “What were you thinking about?”

He might as well ask! “Are you just doing this for me because you feel sorry for me… because you think I’m stupid?”

Mari laughed at his honesty. “No!”

“Why are you helping me then?” Weiss fidgeted nervously. “It’s not like I’m complaining… I just wondered.”

“Because you want to do something and you’re father isn’t letting you.” Mari smirked. “Maybe I’ll still a little rebellious from when I was younger, but I can’t stand that.” He paused for a moment, thinking of his own life. “My old man almost kept me out of college. Hell, he almost kept me out of the military. I had to get him to sign a release for anything! Every single time it was an uphill battle.” He huffed. “And I mean everything too: for books and classes. I knew it was because I was young and they were worried they were going to get sued if I saw or heard something too mature.” He rolled his eyes then. “That bastard.”

Weiss realized how petty he must sound. He knew Mari’s father was a pretty horrible person. Neither Mari, his sister or his mother hid their contempt for him. “But you like my dad.”

“Sure I like the old man. It doesn’t mean I don’t disagree with him. I think you should get to do what you want to do.” He looked at him pointedly then, his smile giving way to a frown. “As long as you mean it. He might not want to help you because you’ve been so half assed up to this point.”

“Well not with this.” Weiss got angry again just thinking about it. “I always got good grades in art class. And it’s not that I minded all the other subjects… they were just boring.”

“Well I have some news for you, you are going to college and you are about to do some really boring things. You still have to take your languages and basic courses.” He frowned, wondering if he could even handle it. “I hate to treat you like a brat, but I’m going to have to just to lay some rules down. You’ll have to agree to a few things first.”

Weiss nodded, if he could do this it would be worth it.

“I don’t want you bringing your little friends over here. I already can’t stand you and the rest of society in general so I don’t want to have to deal with them and their noise.” Weiss nodded again. “I’m not going to keep you from socializing during the day but try to get back here at a decent hour… and remember that you have to cook and clean so give yourself some time to actually do it.” Weiss didn’t complain, it’s not like he went out and partied a lot in high school or anything, he was something of a homebody. “I know college is different with grading, but if you want to remain here you better have a C or better on all of your subjects at the end of the year or you’re out of here.” He glared at him then, “But if you are as committed as you say you are I better see even better or I’ll be disappointed.”

“I won’t mess around.” Weiss huffed at his accusatory tone. He’d show him!

“And don’t get drunk and come stumbling home. This is a medical facility and I’m not going to be responsible for your little white ass.”

“I don’t get drunk.” Weiss huffed, he was one to talk! He remembered walking him home one night after he got himself plastered.

“Good. I know I usually treat you like a kid but from now on I am treating you like an adult. I expect you to do all this crap without me having to ask you to do it. I don’t want to have to ask you to see your transcript so you better just show it to me. I’m not going to stand on you to do your homework… and if you don’t do your housework I’m going to be pissed off. I’m not your father and I never wanted to be… so don’t screw around.”

“Yes sir!” He mock saluted him. “I won’t screw around sir!”

Mari almost smiled at that, almost. “See that you don’t.”

After Mari was finished drilling him with the house rules they talked about school and how much it cost and the supplies he needed, etc. He had most everything he needed as far as class materials went but tuition and books were an entirely different matter. Mari thought at first he could pay it off quickly, but once he realized how much tuition had been raised over the years he let out a little whistling noise and said they would be taking out a loan together instead.
Weiss really didn’t care if Mari paid it off during that time, but it was part of the deal anyway. If there was anything, and there would be, left after his was all over he would insist that he just pay it off. Mari didn’t need to do all this stuff for him. He actually felt like he was taking advantage of him.

Once he came down from the high of actually being able to do what he want he kind of felt guilty and asked Mari if he really meant it and he could back out. Mari just looked at him like a moron and told him he didn’t mind.

He silently wondered if he should accept this sort of thing from him. The whole situation was almost surreal!

“Stop giving me that look!” Restrictor Marianne growled. “If I didn’t want to do it I wouldn’t.”

“But I feel guilty.”

“Yeah, because you haven’t had to live with me yet.” He snickered. “I’m sure after you’ve lived with me a few weeks you’ll come to resent me.”

“No I won’t.”

“Oh,” Marianne grinned at him. “You will... I’ll make a special effort. Maybe I’ll flip pencils into the ceiling and make you get them down?” He laughed. “That would be under the definition of cleaning I suppose.”

“Oh,” Weiss grinned. “So you are going to make me your house slave then?”

“I wouldn’t flaunt the word around too much but that would sum it up nicely.”

“You’re right, I don’t feel bad anymore.”

“Good.” Mari pinched his nose again. “I guess you’ll be moving in here after the summer is over?”

Weiss nodded eagerly, he could hardly wait!

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Author’s notes:

When I first wrote this chapter I was going to have Weiss already graduated from college at a young age like Mari. They talked a little… blah blah blah… confessions were made and they were going to do it right afterwards. By changing it I ended up writing a whole bunch more crap that sounds even more unbelievable!

Oh! And I know it’s so freakin’ easy to get student loans. But for the story sake… and the promise of an almost certain mind-blowing love scene (hopefully) – I think we can ignore that little detail. =D