Recollecting
folder
Final Fantasy VII › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
12
Views:
873
Reviews:
16
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Final Fantasy VII › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
12
Views:
873
Reviews:
16
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
No such thing as Pride
Shera stepped into the cold night air, the slight wind she could feel wiping around her face causing her to shiver slightly. She wanted to say she didn't know exactly what she was doing out there, but that would have been a lie. She knew exactly what she was doing, and exactly who she was looking for. Where the tall gunman had run off to after he left the house was anyone's guess, but she had a good guess that probably wouldn't fail her.
She knew Vincent's type; he was the kind to stand his own ground when it came to a fight he knew he could win, and who had a constituion that most people would give (no pun intended on his part) their left arm to obtain. He was also, though, the kind that easily depended on others he knew he could depend on, and in friendship and (she had to admit it) love, gave his all. His heart, his soul, his trust, everything. Not too long ago before the eventual collapse of Cid's pride, he had ran away from the conflict that was in front of him between his lover and his lover's wife, and was probably hiding somewhere that was a comforting place to him. somewhere safe, somewhere he knew he could stay and think things out, or at least cry. Perhaps both.
she walked up the entrance plank to the Highwind, her bare feet barely making any noise on the metal of the stairs as she walked down into the ship towards the rooms it housed. She knew this ship like the back of her hand: the noises it made in the middle of the night, the way it ran and the way it could break. She knew every serial number to every part in the ship, and she knew where to find Vincent. Softly she padded to room 001, the largest room in the ship, the captain's quarters, and she slowly opened the door and stepped inside. It was dark, the room barely lit up by the soft stream of moonlight coming in through the window. Traces of leftover clothing and bits of paper were strewn out on the floor, and in the corner of the unmade bed, arms wrapped around his legs, sat one gunman. His red eyes glowed softly in the dark of the room, and she followed them to their source and sat down on the bed.
Neither person said anything for a while, but in the end it was Shera that broke the silence. "I knew you'd be here." She waited for an answer that did not come, and so she continued to speak. "I want you to leave, Vincent...I want you to leave and never come back, not to me, not to Cid. I don't want you to ever talk to him or see him again, because no matter what he might have said or told you I'M his wife, not you...I want you to leave."
"...I know." His reply was barely heard, but it was enough.
"...Cid doesn't." She didn't notice the red eyes lift and look at her, but she could hear the slight change in his breathing. "He wants you to stay....he BEGGED me to let you stay, on hands and knees. He begged me...I shouldn't listen to him, I SHOULDN'T, because if I let you stay the SAME thing will happen again, I just know it! I shouldn't let you stay!...I shouldn't...but...I have to.."
The bed shifted behind her again, and this time she turned her head to look at him. His eyes were sad yes, but confused and just as surprised as she felt at her own words. "Why?"
"..he BEGGED me Vincent...he begged me. And you know him, he doesn't beg, he doesn't! And he was in front of me, groveling before me and begging me to let you stay!...through tears, Vincent, tears!...I love him still, and if I make you go away!..I don't want to think about what it would do to him! I saw him in front of me, cowering and pleading and it scared me!....It SCARED me.." Her voice quivered slightly as she talked to him, and for the first time she could feel a slight trace of fear creeping into her voice. "...Why him, Vincent, just tell me that! Tell me what he couldn't, WHY CID!"
"...I fell in love with him for the same reasons I'm sure you did. That's why."
His answer was simple, and blunt, and it hit her like a ton of bricks. The same reasons as her, the very same? Shera knew she had tons of reasons why. Cid was smart, Cid was brave, Cid wasn't afraid to voice his opinion. He was knowledgeable, and wity, and handsome. He was a charmer, a tease and could be a god in bed. She had more reasons than that, she was sure, but they weren't the ones she could put to words. She stared at the red eyes glowing in the dark in front of her for a moment before they looked away, and she turned her face back, too. "....Oh Vincent, I really wish you had chosen a different man."
"...I don't...but I know." He let his sentance linger for a moment before he spoke up again. "I understand why you want me to leave. I should...but I don't want to...I can't."
"Why not?" She asked Vincent the same thing she'd asked Cid, hopeful he wouldn't give the answer she knew was already coming.
"....Because I love him."
"I already knew." She gathered the coat around her and stood, feeling herself grow colder in the unforgiving metal room. "Come with me, Vincent...I have to talk to you. To the both of you. Now."
He waited until she moved to the door before he stood up and followed her, feeling obligated to the woman in front of him. In all of her petite frame and soft stature, he could feel the power she held over the both of them, and was smart enough not to question it as he followed her out of the ship and into the cold Rocket Town air. He couldn't feel the cold, but the numbness set in quickly.
* * * *
It had taken him a good ten minutes after Shera had left before he had finally caught his breath, and now he sat on the couch, head as far between his knees as he could put it. He hated these feelings he felt, and he hated himself for feeling them. His body was shaking terribly, his breath, though better than it was before, was still heavy and harshly drawn, and his eyes stung from being dry because of all of his crying. Finally, resting right in the pit of his stomach, was a huge BALL of emotions all coming up at once, like heartburn. He was angry, and frightened, and curious and SHAMEFUL. The one emotion, the one he knew he should feel more than anything else, strangely was absent.
Regret.
The door opened and he lifted his head up slightly, seeing Shera's bare feet walk in through the door. It was when an equally as fine, yet more masculine, set followed after her did he look up, straight into Shera's face with as much hope and shame as he could muster up.
She looked at Vincent, and pointed at the arm chair furthest away from Cid. The gunman sat obeyingly, his eyes turned away from the blue ones that sought his so desperately. He couldn't look at Cid, not now, not when he knew Shera was looking for a reason, ANY reason, to make him leave. He could feel the pilot's eyes on him, but he wouldn't look back. Not right now.
Cid glanced up at Shera, her eyes on him in cold thought. quickly he looked away and honned his eyes back to the spot of the floor where they'd been last before she came in, and he kept them there as he heard her walk around the room. Neither men spoke, but listened carefully to Shera as she did. "...Vincent will stay." She said this quietly, but could still hear the huge sigh of relief coming from her husband behind her. "But not here...not right now. You have to leave, tomorrow morning, Vincent. Cid, you will have Junior take him wherever he wants to go and you WILL NOT go with him. I will call Vincent back when I feel I should,understood?"
"Yes ma'mm." Thank you, thank you GOD was the only thing he could think as he sat there, his eyes now closed and hands grasped together in a silent prayer to WHOMEVER. Vincent would have to leave for now, but he could come back, and as much as he knew Shera was ROYALY pissed at the both of them he knew this was her way of being merciful when she really, REALLY didn't have to be. Cid knew he had fucked up, Shera knew he had fucked up BIG time, yet she was granting him this.
"And Cid...I don't care right now WHAT brought this...AFFAIR, you two had going on, but I WILL tell you one thing. YOU WILL be faithful to me, you WILL still be MY HUSBAND, and you WILL, YOU WILL take care of YOUR CHILD, DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!" she turned around and looked at him, and he looked at her with wide, fearful and respectively so, eyes.
"Crystal."
"...I'm going back to bed. I don't want you two to touch each other or so much as LOOK at each other tonight!...VINCENT, go to your room!" She pointed up the stairs and he obeyed quickly, not even bothering to look back at the blue eyes that followed his body up the stairs. She waited until his door was closed before she turned back and looked down at Cid, his eyes averted once again. "...Don't you have anything to say, Cid? Or are you still too damn prideful?"
He sat there for a moment before he stood, his head still bowed to her. "Thank you wouldn't cover what I want to say Shera...and right now...I have no such thing as pride."
They went to bed that night, sleeping side by side but turned away from each other. Upstairs, Vincent lay there, his arms wrapped around the middle of a big, old smelling, blue eyed teddy bear, trying not to cry.
* * * *
The next morning came soon, too soon for Vincent's likings, and a silence, thick enough to cut with a butter knife, hung in the air as he made his way downstairs. The house was still, and the only noise he heard was the sound of his own footsteps on the wooden planks below. He had packed almost everything he had, not knowing when he would be able to come back to the Highwind house...not knowing if he could ever come back at all. The one person who would decide his fate stood at the front door, her back to it, waiting for him.
"Ready to go?" She lifted an eyebrow as she eyed the single bag he carried. She watched him nod before she turned and opened the front door, the sound of the all too ready plane engines humming in the cold, foggy morning air of the town. He stepped past her out into the morning fog, and he heard the door close behind him and Shera clear her throat. "Where are you going?"
"...to a friend's house."
"Then don't let me keep you." Shera turned back to walk inside before Vincent stopped her, and lowered his head. "What?"
"...I am sorry, that I have wronged and hurt you...I am sorry I did not tell you sooner..but I am not sorry that I love whom I love...and I am jealous that you can give them something I can not...I hope one day you can forgive me." With that, Vincent sank into a deep bow at the waist, his hair falling down around his face. He stayed like that for a moment before he stood back up, turned, and walked towards the plane, leaving a stunned and rather speechless Shera on the front porch.
* * * *
AAaaaaaaah, tea. There was nothing like tea to warm up the body and soul in the nippy, afternoon air of Wutaii. His zen rock garden, now freshly raked to resemble his inner peace, shone brightly in the sunlight. The koi were swimming in the pond outside, he wore a fresh kimono, all was good in the world.
Then the front door chime rang.
Tseng sighed and stood, a small furrow in his forehead as he frowned. Inner peace, ruined. He walked towards the front entrance, a tall, long haired shadow peeking in through the rice paper door. Ugh. The last thing he expected or wanted was a guest appearence from RENO. He started to open the door, sighing. "I have already told you Reno, I AM NOT coming back to the Turks!"
"WEll, that's fine. I don't want you to." A voice that was not Reno's sounded out, and Tseng opened his eyes to look at the speaker. A man with long, untidy looking black hair and dark red eyes stared back at him, a ratty looking bag slung over his shoulder.
"...Valentine?"
Tseng had a feeling, most from the down fallen look on Vincent's face, that his inner peace would be ruined for QUITE a while.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She knew Vincent's type; he was the kind to stand his own ground when it came to a fight he knew he could win, and who had a constituion that most people would give (no pun intended on his part) their left arm to obtain. He was also, though, the kind that easily depended on others he knew he could depend on, and in friendship and (she had to admit it) love, gave his all. His heart, his soul, his trust, everything. Not too long ago before the eventual collapse of Cid's pride, he had ran away from the conflict that was in front of him between his lover and his lover's wife, and was probably hiding somewhere that was a comforting place to him. somewhere safe, somewhere he knew he could stay and think things out, or at least cry. Perhaps both.
she walked up the entrance plank to the Highwind, her bare feet barely making any noise on the metal of the stairs as she walked down into the ship towards the rooms it housed. She knew this ship like the back of her hand: the noises it made in the middle of the night, the way it ran and the way it could break. She knew every serial number to every part in the ship, and she knew where to find Vincent. Softly she padded to room 001, the largest room in the ship, the captain's quarters, and she slowly opened the door and stepped inside. It was dark, the room barely lit up by the soft stream of moonlight coming in through the window. Traces of leftover clothing and bits of paper were strewn out on the floor, and in the corner of the unmade bed, arms wrapped around his legs, sat one gunman. His red eyes glowed softly in the dark of the room, and she followed them to their source and sat down on the bed.
Neither person said anything for a while, but in the end it was Shera that broke the silence. "I knew you'd be here." She waited for an answer that did not come, and so she continued to speak. "I want you to leave, Vincent...I want you to leave and never come back, not to me, not to Cid. I don't want you to ever talk to him or see him again, because no matter what he might have said or told you I'M his wife, not you...I want you to leave."
"...I know." His reply was barely heard, but it was enough.
"...Cid doesn't." She didn't notice the red eyes lift and look at her, but she could hear the slight change in his breathing. "He wants you to stay....he BEGGED me to let you stay, on hands and knees. He begged me...I shouldn't listen to him, I SHOULDN'T, because if I let you stay the SAME thing will happen again, I just know it! I shouldn't let you stay!...I shouldn't...but...I have to.."
The bed shifted behind her again, and this time she turned her head to look at him. His eyes were sad yes, but confused and just as surprised as she felt at her own words. "Why?"
"..he BEGGED me Vincent...he begged me. And you know him, he doesn't beg, he doesn't! And he was in front of me, groveling before me and begging me to let you stay!...through tears, Vincent, tears!...I love him still, and if I make you go away!..I don't want to think about what it would do to him! I saw him in front of me, cowering and pleading and it scared me!....It SCARED me.." Her voice quivered slightly as she talked to him, and for the first time she could feel a slight trace of fear creeping into her voice. "...Why him, Vincent, just tell me that! Tell me what he couldn't, WHY CID!"
"...I fell in love with him for the same reasons I'm sure you did. That's why."
His answer was simple, and blunt, and it hit her like a ton of bricks. The same reasons as her, the very same? Shera knew she had tons of reasons why. Cid was smart, Cid was brave, Cid wasn't afraid to voice his opinion. He was knowledgeable, and wity, and handsome. He was a charmer, a tease and could be a god in bed. She had more reasons than that, she was sure, but they weren't the ones she could put to words. She stared at the red eyes glowing in the dark in front of her for a moment before they looked away, and she turned her face back, too. "....Oh Vincent, I really wish you had chosen a different man."
"...I don't...but I know." He let his sentance linger for a moment before he spoke up again. "I understand why you want me to leave. I should...but I don't want to...I can't."
"Why not?" She asked Vincent the same thing she'd asked Cid, hopeful he wouldn't give the answer she knew was already coming.
"....Because I love him."
"I already knew." She gathered the coat around her and stood, feeling herself grow colder in the unforgiving metal room. "Come with me, Vincent...I have to talk to you. To the both of you. Now."
He waited until she moved to the door before he stood up and followed her, feeling obligated to the woman in front of him. In all of her petite frame and soft stature, he could feel the power she held over the both of them, and was smart enough not to question it as he followed her out of the ship and into the cold Rocket Town air. He couldn't feel the cold, but the numbness set in quickly.
* * * *
It had taken him a good ten minutes after Shera had left before he had finally caught his breath, and now he sat on the couch, head as far between his knees as he could put it. He hated these feelings he felt, and he hated himself for feeling them. His body was shaking terribly, his breath, though better than it was before, was still heavy and harshly drawn, and his eyes stung from being dry because of all of his crying. Finally, resting right in the pit of his stomach, was a huge BALL of emotions all coming up at once, like heartburn. He was angry, and frightened, and curious and SHAMEFUL. The one emotion, the one he knew he should feel more than anything else, strangely was absent.
Regret.
The door opened and he lifted his head up slightly, seeing Shera's bare feet walk in through the door. It was when an equally as fine, yet more masculine, set followed after her did he look up, straight into Shera's face with as much hope and shame as he could muster up.
She looked at Vincent, and pointed at the arm chair furthest away from Cid. The gunman sat obeyingly, his eyes turned away from the blue ones that sought his so desperately. He couldn't look at Cid, not now, not when he knew Shera was looking for a reason, ANY reason, to make him leave. He could feel the pilot's eyes on him, but he wouldn't look back. Not right now.
Cid glanced up at Shera, her eyes on him in cold thought. quickly he looked away and honned his eyes back to the spot of the floor where they'd been last before she came in, and he kept them there as he heard her walk around the room. Neither men spoke, but listened carefully to Shera as she did. "...Vincent will stay." She said this quietly, but could still hear the huge sigh of relief coming from her husband behind her. "But not here...not right now. You have to leave, tomorrow morning, Vincent. Cid, you will have Junior take him wherever he wants to go and you WILL NOT go with him. I will call Vincent back when I feel I should,understood?"
"Yes ma'mm." Thank you, thank you GOD was the only thing he could think as he sat there, his eyes now closed and hands grasped together in a silent prayer to WHOMEVER. Vincent would have to leave for now, but he could come back, and as much as he knew Shera was ROYALY pissed at the both of them he knew this was her way of being merciful when she really, REALLY didn't have to be. Cid knew he had fucked up, Shera knew he had fucked up BIG time, yet she was granting him this.
"And Cid...I don't care right now WHAT brought this...AFFAIR, you two had going on, but I WILL tell you one thing. YOU WILL be faithful to me, you WILL still be MY HUSBAND, and you WILL, YOU WILL take care of YOUR CHILD, DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!" she turned around and looked at him, and he looked at her with wide, fearful and respectively so, eyes.
"Crystal."
"...I'm going back to bed. I don't want you two to touch each other or so much as LOOK at each other tonight!...VINCENT, go to your room!" She pointed up the stairs and he obeyed quickly, not even bothering to look back at the blue eyes that followed his body up the stairs. She waited until his door was closed before she turned back and looked down at Cid, his eyes averted once again. "...Don't you have anything to say, Cid? Or are you still too damn prideful?"
He sat there for a moment before he stood, his head still bowed to her. "Thank you wouldn't cover what I want to say Shera...and right now...I have no such thing as pride."
They went to bed that night, sleeping side by side but turned away from each other. Upstairs, Vincent lay there, his arms wrapped around the middle of a big, old smelling, blue eyed teddy bear, trying not to cry.
* * * *
The next morning came soon, too soon for Vincent's likings, and a silence, thick enough to cut with a butter knife, hung in the air as he made his way downstairs. The house was still, and the only noise he heard was the sound of his own footsteps on the wooden planks below. He had packed almost everything he had, not knowing when he would be able to come back to the Highwind house...not knowing if he could ever come back at all. The one person who would decide his fate stood at the front door, her back to it, waiting for him.
"Ready to go?" She lifted an eyebrow as she eyed the single bag he carried. She watched him nod before she turned and opened the front door, the sound of the all too ready plane engines humming in the cold, foggy morning air of the town. He stepped past her out into the morning fog, and he heard the door close behind him and Shera clear her throat. "Where are you going?"
"...to a friend's house."
"Then don't let me keep you." Shera turned back to walk inside before Vincent stopped her, and lowered his head. "What?"
"...I am sorry, that I have wronged and hurt you...I am sorry I did not tell you sooner..but I am not sorry that I love whom I love...and I am jealous that you can give them something I can not...I hope one day you can forgive me." With that, Vincent sank into a deep bow at the waist, his hair falling down around his face. He stayed like that for a moment before he stood back up, turned, and walked towards the plane, leaving a stunned and rather speechless Shera on the front porch.
* * * *
AAaaaaaaah, tea. There was nothing like tea to warm up the body and soul in the nippy, afternoon air of Wutaii. His zen rock garden, now freshly raked to resemble his inner peace, shone brightly in the sunlight. The koi were swimming in the pond outside, he wore a fresh kimono, all was good in the world.
Then the front door chime rang.
Tseng sighed and stood, a small furrow in his forehead as he frowned. Inner peace, ruined. He walked towards the front entrance, a tall, long haired shadow peeking in through the rice paper door. Ugh. The last thing he expected or wanted was a guest appearence from RENO. He started to open the door, sighing. "I have already told you Reno, I AM NOT coming back to the Turks!"
"WEll, that's fine. I don't want you to." A voice that was not Reno's sounded out, and Tseng opened his eyes to look at the speaker. A man with long, untidy looking black hair and dark red eyes stared back at him, a ratty looking bag slung over his shoulder.
"...Valentine?"
Tseng had a feeling, most from the down fallen look on Vincent's face, that his inner peace would be ruined for QUITE a while.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~