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One (Last) Chance	By : RotSeele Category: Final Fantasy VIII > Yaoi - Male/Male > Seifer/Squall Views: 3719 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy 8. I do not make any money from this story.

Chapter List
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Twenty - Seifer POV

I heard a polite knock at the door that probably would’ve turned violent if I had chosen to ignore it. I had considered it, especially when I looked down at the brunette curled against my side in a decidedly deep sleep. He’d let me kiss him and hold him, but he hadn’t let me go any further than that. I contented myself with laying beside him while he slept, studying his face and features, smoothing back his hair when he shifted and locks of it fell over his face. I thought I understood his reasons to keep from getting closer, getting intimate, but every time I thought I could convince him otherwise, there was always that subtle shift away. He never moved away physically, just mentally. I knew he was stressed out about everything we had done, or what we were going to do, and all that stress would eventually break him. And I didn’t want to see Squall broken.
Somehow, I managed to extricate myself from Squall and padded quietly over to the door. I unlocked it and opened it a crack, allowing myself to peek out at Rinoa. She was standing with her back to me, her hands clasped together at the small of her back. She was wearing her little yellow number, and I found myself wondering where she had stashed that since she’d worn it the night of the SeeD ball.
Not wanting to wake Squall, I slipped out into the hall and closed the door gently behind me. “Okay, princess,” I started quietly, “what the hell is going on here?”
Rinoa turned to face me, doing a silly little pirouette that accented her in all the right ways. The grin she wore, however, kept certain things in check with a healthy dose of fear, because Rinoa didn’t grin like that unless she had some nefarious plan that would get her and anyone helping her in a healthy dose of trouble. She struck a pose, pointing over my shoulder at Squall’s door.
“I’m here for the Commander!” She had enough sense to keep her voice down, at least. Then her eyes narrowed slightly at me, and the grin shrank a little. “Unless... you’ve already decided he’s not going to go?”
“Go? Go where?”
“Uh, the concert?”
“What con- You know what, never mind. I don’t want to know.”
Rinoa really did frown now. “Well, Quistis, Selphie, Zell, Irvine, and me put together this lovely little concert for Squall. You know, to celebrate his promotion and just have a little fun before the world goes to crap with war and stuff. I mean, we have to go save this Ellone girl from the sorceress, right? And we have to make sure the sorceress can’t hurt any more people. I know Squall’s got a lot on his shoulders, but we thought this would be good for him. A chance for him to unwind. Unless you and he...”
Getting her meaning by the pink stain to her cheeks, I blew out a sigh. “No. We didn’t.”
“Oh.”
“Don’t sound so disappointed, princess.”
“No! I’m not!” Her cheeks turned redder as I stared at her. “I mean, I’m not disappointed. I just thought... you know.”
“Squall is a very stubborn guy. If he doesn’t want it, it doesn’t happen.”
“I’m sorry.” Rinoa meant it, which surprised me. Then her eyes narrowed in thought for a minute, and her forefinger tapped her lips. “I got it! You go ahead and go down to FH. There’s a stage set up before the mayor’s house. Go wait there. I’ll bring Squall, and then you can take it from there.”
My mind stuttered to a halt. “Wait a damned minute. Are you trying to get some fan-service here?”
“A girl has needs. Boys have needs. It just so happens,” Rinoa pointed at my chest, “that your needs and my needs coincide. I don’t need much. Just a flash of skin.”
I rubbed my face. “For fuck’s sake, Rin...” If Squall found out, I was dead. Rinoa wouldn’t be too far after me. I looked down at her, saw her smiling, and realized I had just been suckered.
She grinned wider. “Of course I wouldn’t watch! Jeez, Seifer, you are so sensitive sometimes. Squall would kill me if he knew I watched him get a little. Besides,” she oggled her eyes at me, “I already know what you look like without all that on.”
“I really hate you sometimes.”
“So does that mean you’ll do it?”
I rubbed my face again and blew out a sigh. “Fine. But Squall’s sleeping right now. Don’t wake him up.”
Rinoa saluted me. It was the impish sort of salute, the one coupled with the expression of ‘who, me?’ that promised mischief before the day was out. I shook my head but headed toward the concert area as told. Whatever she was going to do it would be on her shoulders. If Squall killed her, I guess we’d find out real quick if it was going to be either Quistis or Selphie who would become the next sorceress. I headed down out of the Garden toward FH, and found my way to the center of the town. A huge stage had been erected there, and judging by Irvine’s shit-eating grin, it had been by his request. I noticed Zell, Selphie, and Quistis were on stage, handling instruments like they were made of glass.
“Yo, Seifer.”
I looked back over my shoulder to find Fujin and Raijin making their way down toward me. Fujin was focused on me, but Raijin was watching the stage with a look of pure confusion. I hadn’t seen them since I had gotten back from the missile base, which was mostly my fault. I had focused on Squall, since he’d begun to get more and more tense about the events that were coming.
“Yo, yourselves.” I replied when they stopped before me. “What’s up?”
Raijin rubbed the back of his neck. “So, uh, we heard about what you did at the Galbadia Missile Base. Can’t believe you talked Squall into lettin’ you take on that kinda mission.”
I didn’t really talk him into letting me go. He gave me the rope and I swung instead of hanged. I shrugged, smirking. “Yeah, well. Can’t keep a good man down, right?”
Fujin rolled her one eye. “Why didn’t you come see us?”
“I was busy?”
She scowled at me, but Raijin looked like he was about to accept my explanation. I hated that I couldn’t tell them what Squall had told me, but I was sure they wouldn’t believe me even if I did. What was I going to tell them anyway? That I had been the lapdog of an evil sorceress and they had been my goons, terrorizing Balamb and other people in order to find Ellone so Ultimecia could bring about the Time Compression and kill us all?
Fujin took a step closer to me and lightly bumped her fist against my chest. “Squall.”
I looked down at her fist, realizing with some shock that her knuckles rested lightly against my heart. I met her gaze with a slight frown. “What about him?”
“I may have only one eye, Seifer, but I’m not stupid. There’s something different about him. Something different about you.” she said softly, probably to keep Raijin from hearing. He was staring at the stage anyway, jaw dropped in some kind of amazement. A quick glance told me Quistis was bending over to look at something.
Some guys, you know?
Fujin continued, “Whatever it is, I don’t think it’s bad. You two have always balanced each other. It doesn’t surprise me, if it’s come to that.”
I swallowed hard and looked away from her, but I still saw the surprise in her crimson eye. It was quickly followed by a swift calculation, then a gentle smile teased her lips. I jabbed a finger toward her. “You will never say a word.” I growled.
“Never.” Fujin replied, still smiling. “But we are still a posse. I’ll remind you of that, if I need to.”
“Yeah, I know.” I rubbed the back of my neck. I glanced toward the top of FH and saw Rinoa’s back, her hands clasped behind her again as she leaned forward, speaking to someone. I saw Irvine and Selphie, too, which meant Squall was up there. I looked back at Fujin then, tilting my head to the side. “Some bad shit’s gonna go down after today. While I’m dealing with the Ice Prince and the others, I need you two to be watching my back. I need you two to protect Garden.”
Raijin looked at me with a wide, stupid grin. “Don’t worry, Seifer. We always got your back, ya know?”
Fujin gave her boyfriend a long look before she returned her gaze to me. She nodded, reaching up to place her palm against my cheek in an incredibly sisterly way. “You do what you have to do, Seifer. Whatever happens, we’ve got you.” She patted my cheek, then pointedly turned and walked away, dragging Raijin with her. I watched them go, then shook myself, letting out the breath I hadn’t been aware I’d been holding.
What complicated relationships you humans have, Ifrit commented off-handedly. He was lounging somewhere near the back of my consciousness, not in the immediate forefront but not too far away either.
Is there a problem with that? I snapped back as I headed toward the edge of the platform. I scowled at the magazine there, recognizing Irvine’s handiwork. I was tempted to kick it, but it was probably part of whatever plan he’d dreamt up to get Squall hooked up with Rinoa. I jumped down from there, landing as lightly as I could on the reflective panel.
No. Although I do find it amusing that your one-eyed friend there is far more observant than most.
Fujin’s always been like that.
For as long as I’d known the one-eyed girl, Fujin had always seen more than anyone else ever had. She’d seen through my personal quirks to know what was a shield and what was genuine; she’d known before I had that Squall and I were destined to be rivals and she’d known before I had that I was going to break up with Rinoa. She probably had figured out Squall loved me before he’d bothered to tell me. She probably had figured out my feelings for Squall went beyond that of a rival now, without me needing to tell her.
I folded my arms over my chest and tilted my head back so I could see the sky. I could hear Rinoa’s voice, followed by Squall’s. He wasn’t amused by the “plan” they had all come up with, but he was at least willing to play along. I could tell by his tone he was being honest with Rinoa, and since she wasn’t squealing in girlish glee or getting that annoyed tone in her voice, she was being honest with him as well. For a moment, I felt a spike of jealousy, but I realized that it was Squall the Sorceress’ Knight reacting to his sorceress, even though she was still powerless. Since I had only felt the pull of that bond with a corrupted sorceress, I had no idea what that bond felt like when the Knight chose to be a Knight for himself. I wondered if I would ever feel that kind of bond.
Do you need to?
I looked down onto the solar array and saw the reflection of Carbuncle looking back at me. His little furry head was tilted to the side in askance. What?
His head tilted the other way. Do you need to feel that kind of bond? Isn’t the love you have for Squall enough?
I frowned. I wanted to answer ‘of course’, but then that would be a lie, I realized. I wanted to know what he felt for Rinoa as a Knight, if only so I could be on the same playing field as him. Carbuncle shifted, his ruby eyes flicking upward where he knew Squall was standing nearby. I wanted to look too, but I kept my eyes firmly on the furry GF. Call me selfish, I said at last, but I want to know what it’s like to be the Knight of a good sorceress.
Squall could tell you. Why don’t you ask him?
One does not simply ask Leonhart personal things.
Carbuncle looked confused, but his image distorted as a tremor ran through the solar array behind me. It didn’t take long for his image to vanish, and at last I turned around to see Rinoa and Squall behind me. Squall seemed shocked to see me standing there, but Rinoa had a kitten-who-got-the-cream smile on her face. She glanced at me, grinned, then focused on Squall as he turned to face her.
“That’s it! Just let out anything!” she said, throwing her arms wide to her sides. “Anything... we want you to talk to us a little more. That’s all. Y’know, if there’s anything you want to tell us, or anything we can do, don’t hesitate to let us know. I know it’s not easy but I wish you would trust us and rely on us a little more, like you do Seifer.”
I could almost imagine Squall’s expression. It wasn’t like he didn’t trust them, it was that he couldn’t tell them that everything they were experiencing for the first time, he’d already lived through. I knew because he’d told me, and I was realizing it had been an incredibly condensed version that lacked in details. But they didn’t know that I was in on the secret; all they saw was that Squall had taken an unnatural (for Squall) interest in me, and had basically made me his second in command. They had seen different facets of him over the last few weeks, and they recognized that he’d given them a measure of freedom that a normal leader wouldn’t have. I mean, he knew Selphie was worked up over Trabia and he still sent her - with me and Quistis - to stop the attack on Balamb Garden despite the obvious hair-trigger she had on her self-control. She’d conducted herself admirably considering all things, but no other leader would have afforded her such leeway unless he’d been there to curb her himself.
“I trust you.” Squall’s soft voice brought me back to reality. He was looking away, off to the side as if he couldn’t find the right words if he was looking at her. He continued, “I know it seems like things are happening that should be freaking me out, as it’s freaked all of you out, but I can’t let it affect me. At least, not in front of anyone. Believe me, there’s no one else I’d rather have working with me than you guys.”
Rinoa’s grin lessened to a gentle smile. “You were just doing so much on your own...”
“There are things only I can do, just like there are things only you can do.” Now he looked at her. “Like there are things only they can do. In the coming days, we’re going to have to work together far more than usual to make sure we survive this.”
Rinoa glanced at me, but I made a point of keeping my face neutral. Her eyes returned to Squall and she gave him a SeeD salute. Squall’s body language told me that he found that amusing for some reason. “All right!” Rinoa said brightly. “I’ll let everyone know. Don’t stay up too late, okay? We’ve got a busy day ahead of us tomorrow!”
We watched her go, and soon it was just us and the terrible music being played by a couple of SeeDs who, for once, had no clue what they were doing. Squall turned to regard me with an amused little smile, and I shrugged.
“In my defense,” I started, “I had nothing to do with the planning.”
“I know.”
“You actually let them do this?”
“I didn’t have a choice. I was blissfully ignorant.”
“Uh-huh.”
Squall moved closer to me, until only a few inches separated us. He looked up at me, studying my face with a little frown. “I meant everything I said to her.”
Now it was my turn to smile. “I know.”
“Do you?”
Since his words sounded cryptic, I canted my head to the side and reached out to drape both my arms over his shoulders. After a moment, he raised his arms to wrap them around my waist, but he didn’t step closer to me. I waited for him to continue, knowing me prompting him would only cause him to shut down. If he wanted me to answer, he would let me know with a glance or a twitch of his body.
At last Squall let out a soft breath. “There are only things you can do, Seifer. Many of those things we’re going to discover along the way now, but I’m going to need you to do them, no matter what.”
“I’ll get them done.” I swore.
Now he looked up at me, his stormy eyes both a little worried and a little relieved at once. “Even if I ask you to leave me behind?”
I felt my face become perfectly still as an unerring sense of unease came over me. “What do you mean?”
He just stared at me.
“Do I have to answer that now?”
He continued to stare at me.
I frowned deeply. “My loyalty is going to come with a price this time.”
Blue-grey suddenly became wary.
Good, I thought, pulling him closer and more firmly against me in a tight hug that was more for my benefit than his, he at least knows I still don’t fuck around.
I held tightly to him for a few heartbeats longer, and felt his arms around my waist tighten slightly as well. It was my only clue to what he was feeling. No, he didn’t want to lose me by forcing me do to something I would rebel against anyway, but he knew if he didn’t have me do it, our entire mission would be at risk. At the same time, he knew me well enough that I would rebel against him, especially if what he asked me to do forced me to choose. And there was no way in hell that I was going to choose the mission over his life or anyone else’s. He knew that, too, which was why he hadn’t said anything yet. It was his way of letting me know that he knew I was serious.
I leaned down so my lips could brush the pale shell of his ear, and I felt him shudder against me. His arms around my waist tightened more, as if he were afraid that I was going to push him away. Not that I was going to do that. Yet. I whispered, “We’re too exposed here. I don’t want anyone seeing us.”
Squall’s body tensed. His throat worked. I felt him nod against my lips, since they were still close to his ear. I let him go then, not wanting to make him feel caged. I didn’t think he would run, but there was now that tenseness to his body that told me he was nervous and uncertain and maybe a little afraid. I kept my eyes on him as he moved toward the very edge of the solar array, under the platform that the mayor’s house rested on. The shadows would hide us easily enough, and anyone looking for us would have to do some serious neck craning to be able to find us. He turned around and faced me, leaning against the structure in the most nervous, sexy way. If I didn’t know him any better, I’d say he was doing it on purpose.
I approached him slowly, knowing if I didn’t, Squall would likely punch me. He wouldn’t run away; that wasn’t in his nature. He watched me as I boxed him in, leaving him a little space to maneuver if he decided this wasn’t going to happen. But those stormy eyes of his remained locked on mine, and I was happy to fall right into them.
Our lips met, at first tentatively. It still felt strange to be kissing another man, even if Squall could pass as a very convincing girl with a little makeup and the right clothes. Slowly, the kiss deepened. Squall’s lips parted, allowing me to slip my tongue into his mouth. After a minute, I pulled back, grinning down at him. His stormy eyes narrowed in a mix of disappointment and confusion. I grinned wider. “I didn’t expect you to favor peppermint, but I guess that makes sense for the Ice Prince.”
Stormy grey narrowed at me.
Any response I could’ve had was stopped by one of his hands tangling in the short strands of hair on the back of my head, the other gripping the front of my shirt, and both working in unison to pull me down to kiss him again. I was all to happy to oblige him, and I moved my hands to grip his waist and pull him closer until we were flush against one another. I don’t know how long we spent kissing, but eventually Squall made the first move, which surprised me. His hands slid away from my hair and my shirt and slid them both underneath my clothes, his fingers exploring my stomach and chest. His calloused fingers were rough against my skin, making me shiver. It took me a minute to get my wits about me to return the favor, slipping my hands under his white shirt to touch him in all the places he had touched me.
I didn’t know how long Squall intended to keep feeling me up, and I knew I couldn’t really make a move on him until he gave me his silent go-ahead. I wanted to; Hyne, I badly wanted to, considering how tight my own pants were getting, but I fought to content myself with his mouth and the smoothness of his skin, at least until I ran my fingers over the puckered flesh of a scar. Then his hands moved to my waist, allowing me to do the same. He broke the kiss and rested his forehead against my shoulder, panting softly. His hands, disappointingly, had stopped where they were, resting against my hips and not doing much more than that.
“Seifer.” Squall whispered. I couldn’t help the shiver that wracked my body at the husky sound of his voice, at the permission it granted in just the syllables of my name.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
His head nodded once against my shoulder.
My hands moved, slowly at first. Squall still wasn’t looking at me; his forehead was pressed firmly against my shoulder. I could tell he was watching, though, because his breathing was changing. With each motion my fingers made against his first belt, then the second and third, his breath either hitched or released in a long sigh. I became aware that I was shaking slightly. It was nerves, excitement, a heady mix of fear and what-the-hell-am-I-doing, but I didn’t stop. As I opened the last belt and hooked my fingers in the hem of Squall’s pants to open them, Squall lifted his head and stared at me. I froze and stared back at him.
His lips twitched slightly, as if he were about to smile. “We don’t have much time.” he whispered.
I cocked my head slightly, still able to hear the terrible music being played. “Time enough.”
Squall shook his head with a tiny smile on his lips. His hands moved, and I sucked in a deep breath as his hands slid from my hips to my belt. His fingers were swift with that and swifter still in opening my fly. Then he hesitated, and I imagined I was about to get a serious case of blue balls, at least until I felt the heat of his fingers hovering over my very erect member.
Squall let out a soft breath. “Are you sure about this, Seifer?”
“Fine time to be asking, Squall.”
He looked up at me through his bangs. I somehow kept from rolling my eyes at him in exasperation and moved my left hand to his wrist. “I’m going to show you this once, but next time, I expect you to know what you’re doing.”
“I outrank you.”
“Nice comeback, Ice Prince.” I silenced him with a kiss before he could threaten me and I tightened my grip on his wrist so he couldn’t pull away. He didn’t seem to have that intent, instead letting his hand go limp so I could manipulate it. I said nothing as I guided his hand to my cock, other than to take a sharp breath as his gunblade-calloused fingers obligingly wrapped around the sensitive, hard flesh. He let out a soft noise that I wouldn’t dare call a ‘mew’ to his face as I wrapped my own hand around his member. And then the time for words was gone, because once I started moving my hand, Squall began moving his in complete imitation. Whatever my fingers did to his cock, his did to mine. It was the most mind-blowing experience I’d ever had. Not even Rinoa, with her delicate fingers, compared to Squall. It was physical cues he used to gauge whether or not I liked something, and soon he found a rhythm that was sending me higher and higher on that proverbial cloud. He wasn’t doing much better under my attention, though.
His pale skin was flushed, his eyes half closed as he watched our hands move. He made soft, breathy noises which I thought was typical Squall; even in combat, he never said a damn word or yelled anything, obscenities included. That was all me, and even though I let out a groaned “Fuck” now and then, I fought to keep my own noises down if only because I didn’t know when the music would stop and I didn’t want to share this with anyone except Squall.
Squall lifted his head and kissed me hard, wrapping his free arm around my neck to pull himself closer. My free arm went around his waist to keep him there, and our occupied hands seemed to work at a furious pace. Then Squall let out a sound that was pure, unadulterated pleasure and I felt wetness against my hand. That sensation, that sound, broke me; I came too and came hard, gripping tightly to Squall because I felt as though if I let him go, I would fall and wouldn’t be able to get back up.
It took both of us longer than it probably should have to recover from our orgasms. Squall pulled back enough to be able to release me and pull his hand up between us, staring at the pearlescent fluid covering his fingers like it was a blobra about to eat his face. It was an expression I wouldn’t dare call cute and hope to live. His grey eyes flicked to me, studying my face. I let go of him as well, able to stand at last on my own two feet without his support. Squall shivered as he lost my close warmth and went to scrub his hand clean on his thigh. I caught his wrist, though, and brought his hand to my lips, where I licked my own essence off the slim digits. I almost laughed as Squall’s eyes grew wide at my ministrations and when he jerked his hand, I let him go.
“The hell, Seifer?” Squall asked, staring at his hand like it had betrayed him.
“What?”
“That’s... that’s...”
“That’s what?”
“You know what.” he growled softly.
I grinned and licked my own hand clean, only because it would irritate him. “Disgusting? I didn’t know you were such a prude, Leonhart. I just wanted to know what you tasted like.”
His cheeks flamed bright red. He glanced at his own hand, which still had small traces of my seed on it. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head and it took all my willpower to keep from grinning any wider than I was already. Squall flicked his gaze back up to mine and pointedly scrubbed his hand clean on his pants before he zipped himself back up and re-did all of his belts. Now I did grin wider and earned a glower from him.
“We should get back.” he said at last.
I caught him as he passed me and pulled him to me for a kiss. He resisted, but gave in at last. When he pulled back, there was a little scowl on his face, that expression that told me he wasn’t quite sure what to think of me at that moment. “Squall,” I started.
He kissed me to silence me. Then he took my hand and led me back to Garden.
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One (Last) Chance