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Insanity	By : Naniris Category: Final Fantasy VIII > General Views: 611 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Insanity
- 2-Denial
- 3-Masks
- 4-Reaction
- 5-Dreams
- 6-Misunderstanding
- 7-Voice
- 8-Cruelty
- 9-Overwhelmed
- 10-Childhood
- 2
- 3
- 4
This is a SeiferxZell yaoi and if you don�t like it don�t
read it.
Disclaimer: I make no money off of them, if I did the world
would be a better place and I�d actually own them. ;_;
Why? Because she�s a woman?�No, well not exactly�Are you saying that you�re a woman?...
NO!!!, she�s my friend and I trust her�Well,
if want to keep her as your friend, you�d better shut up and smile� But the
nightmares�They�ll go away�But what
about�Trust me, everything will be fine~

�Zell, are you okay? You seem to be out of it.� Quistis
questioned worriedly. �If you want we can go some other time.�

�No, no let�s go now. I was just concentrating on my victory
stance and stuff. Don�t worry.� The tattooed blond started to run down the
hallway. �Come on! Are you going to stand there all day.�

�Fine, fine I�m coming.�

They walked towards the training center, smiling and waving
at several people who wanted to congratulate them on saving the world. �Does
the attention ever die down?� Zell asked in a whisper. �Probably not�

They were approaching the entrance of the training center
when a girl with a pig-tail stopped them. She was looking at her shoes as she
tried to talk to them.

�H-hi, Zell. D-do you remember me?� She asked shyly while and
at the same time finding a sudden interest of her own hands. The girl wore the
regular Balamb student uniform and could be considered pretty, but she didn�t
stand out much. She looked vaguely familiar. Then it clicked.

�Oohh yeah, you�re from the library, right?� Zell glanced at
Quistis searching for an answer, but she seemed just as confused. �You�re
uh�you�re�um��

�Mary Sue! I�m so glad you remember me, Zell.� She
practically jumped on the spot and then she grabbed Zell�s
hand. �After all you�ve been through; I was worried you�d forgotten about me. I
haven�t seen you in the library in ages!�

�Yeah�uh� well I�ve been busy and stuff.� He rubbed the back
of his neck and tried to retrieve his hand without being obvious about it.
�What about you? How�s life been treating ya?�

�Good, good! I�ve been perfecting my healing magic, cataloging
most of the books in the library and I�ve been writing a book about how the war
has affected me and my loved ones; nothing much.� She grabbed his other hand
and gazed at his face, oblivious to the discomfort of the martial artist. �I�ve
been so worried about you lately, what with all this death and mayhem! I
thought I�d never see you again!� She released both his hands to cover her
face. �You have such a beautiful soul; it would be a shame if something were to
tarnish it.�

~What the fuck is her problem?�Can�t you tell? She�s flirting� It�s not working�Invite her to the ball�WHAT?!? Why?... Because you need something to take your mind
off things� But I barely like her� Just
do what I say� There�s no point� There
is, just trust me...~
```
She was still talking about how awful the war was unaware that Zell didn�t hear a word she said.
```
```
 
```
```
 �Want to go to the ball with me?� The words came out so suddenly that it startled Quistis and Mary Sue �I mean if you�re not busy or anything.�
```
Quistis gave him a worried look �Zell, are you sure? I mean
with�� Quistis was rudely interrupted by the librarian. �Of course, he�s sure.
He wouldn�t ask if he wasn�t.�

�Does that mean you�re going?� He groaned inwardly, no
caring either way. There wasn�t anyone else he could think of bringing and he
wasn�t even sure he wanted to go anyway. �It�s in less than two weeks.�

�Yes, I�ll go on a date with you to the ball.� She smiled
sweetly and then looked at her watch. �Oh, look at the time. I�m already late
to meet someone. We�ll talk later, okay. I�m very glad you asked me out.� She
started to walk away. �Bye, see you later!�

�What was that about? You never ask anyone out, much less
people you barely know.� She continued to interrogate her shorter companion
while walking towards the center. �You have been acting differently and I�m
worried about you.�

�I�m fine, �k? People change and I thought you�d be glad I�d
go out with someone.� He retorted defensively. �Look! Let�s just fight with
some monsters, beat�em up and see whether or not that whip of yours can still
kick ass or if it�s a jumping rope.�

�Fine, we�ll see whether those gloves do anything besides
cover your hands.� Quistis laughed while Zell pouted and shot her his unique
angry look. �Oh, have I said something to bother you.�

�The power�s in the fists, baby!!! But they hone that power
into a weapon of mass destruction.� He flaunted his Ehrgeiz in her face and did
a series of lighting fast punches in the air. �Now let�s go before the little
beasties die from old age.�

Quistis chuckled lightly. �Then off we go.� ~He seems happy.
Maybe he really was just tired the other day. He still spaces out every once in
awhile. I hope I�m just making too much of a big deal out of it. I hope he
really is happy. ~

After smothering several Grats and Raldos, the martial
artist is covered in gunk and blood from the monsters. Quistis kept lecturing
him on the pros of using a weapon that keeps you at a safe distance from such
situations, while Zell complained about the lack of a challenge in the training
center. An hour passed when their playful banter is interrupted by an ear-splitting
scream. They immediately raced towards the source.

A few junior Cadets were shivering and their faces were pale
with fright. Quistis assumed her role as the calm and rational ex-instructor.
�What�s going on? Where�s your instructor?�

�W-w-we were p-playing heroes and wit-c-ch-ches, when a
b-b-big din-n-nosaur came out.� The tallest one was stuttering and could barely
continue.

�But then Squall came out behind it and started to attack it
and told us to run and we did and then we ran into you and then you started to
ask us questions.� The other cadet explained rapidly.

�It was sooo cool; I bet he was chasing after it because
that big old dino look scared. He came out with his gunblade and went� take
this and that!!!� The youth started to duplicate his new-found hero�s attacks
and was obviously excited to have witnessed it. �It was sooo cool, man.�

�Was there anyone else with you?� She needed to know, in
case somebody was in need of assistance.

�N-no, just us.� The stuttering was more controlled, but
still present in his voice.

�Good.� She sighed in relief. Besides some scrapes and cuts,
the boy�s looked fine. �You know that regulations clearly state
that under no conditions are junior cadets allowed into the training
center without an instructor. Do you wish to be expelled?�

Their faces paled even more. �We promise not to do it again
and to follow the rules and we�re very, very sorry and please don�t expel us
and we want to SeeD like you and�� He tried convincing her until Zell stood
next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

�Don�t worry, she won�t rat you out, will you Quistis? She�s
only tryin� to scare you guys. Hyne, when we were young, we got into a lot
worse than this. Like the time�� He stopped when he noticed Quistis giving him
an icy glare that could pierce his soul. �Of course, you know you could�ve been
killed and rules are there for a reason so you�d better follow them next time,
�k?�

The taller blond rolled her eyes in exasperation. �Thank you
Mr. Dincht, for such a helpful comment.� Sarcasm dripped from every word. She
looked at the pre-teens and saw the smallest smile on their faces. ~Great ~
�Now come with me to see the doctor and make sure you have no internal
injuries. Zell, are you coming?�

�Nah, I�m going to practice some more. And kids don�t worry
about your savior. I�m sure Squall can handle himself. He�s gotten through
worse things.� Zell grinned widely, small fangs peeking out from the corners of
his mouth.

Quistis smiled back, relieved to see the jovial Zell she
knew. �Don�t stay to long, it�s going to be dinner soon and you definitely need
to shower.� She raised an eyebrow, glancing worriedly at his messy state.

�No prob, Instructor Trepe.� He waved goodbye and resumed
his training.

~That was good. Keep
it up and everything will be back to normal� I know. It�s great to feel
like this but�but wh/i>./i>... but it
still hurts� Damn it! Get a grip and stop
whining� You�re right, sorry~ Just then a loud pained roar was heard
through out the center and a following earth shaking crash was felt. Zell,
however was barely aware of it since he was deep in thought.

Squall was walking away from the giant corpse that he had
slain moments ago. He held a star fragment in his hand and wondered why a dinosaur
would have one and how a prehistoric beast could have gotten one in the first
place. �Mysteries of the world� he guessed. He was covered in the beast�s blood
from a wound he inflicted on its neck.

~Now I need to take a shower before dinner. It was worth it
though, I haven�t fought that hard in awhile.~ He spotted Zell standing in a
clearing near the entrance. ~Looks like he could use a shower, too. Wonder why
he�s standing there so still. It isn�t like him to not be jumping around. Maybe
I should go talk to him or something, get him to accompany me to the showers
and find out what�s bugging him. That isn�t like me at all; reassuring other
people; he�ll probably think I�m an alien replacing his old friend.~ Squall
sighed inwardly ~ Okay, here goes nothing.~

�Hey, Zell!!!� Squall called out breaking the small blond
out of his daze. Zell looked to his side and saw the brunette walking towards
him, the Lion Heart in his hand. His heart started beating rapidly and his
breathing quickened as adrenaline started to flow through his body. He mentally
panicked and felt the need to run and hide or fight back, grow in him. Blood
was rushing to his legs and arms so he could hit hard and run fast. The
all-too-familiar instinct took him over - fear.

~Oh my Gods!�Zell,
calm down� He�s covered in blood�It�s
just Squall, relax�Stop, stop, please stop�Get a grip� I can�t win against a gunblade�You don�t have to, he�s not going to fight�~ Zell began to shake
and feebly put his arms up in a defensive posture. Memories ran quickly across
his mind. {He was covered in dry blood and his once aristocratic clothes were
torn. The Hyperion was also blood-stained and looking very menacing at the
moment��..�. �Nine, Ten�Always fear men��You�re so goddamn attractive;
you can�t blame me for wanting to grind your ass. With your tight ass and
perfect body, I bet Irvine and
Squall have been sneaking peeks every once in a while�}

�Zell, what�s wrong?� Squall looked at his friend in
confusion. ~ Does he want to fight? No, he�s scared, but why? What did I do?~
He took a step closer and he saw Zell stagger away from him as if he was the
Omega Weapon. �Zell, I�m not going to hurt you. Tell me what�s wrong?�

�S-s-stay b-ba-a-ack, I-I-I�m war-n-ning you. D-don�t
c-c-come any c-c-clo-s-ser.� He put his hands in front of his face with his
palms turned outward, trying to block Squall from view. ~Calm the fuck down�He wants to, to�No, he doesn�t. Now stop acting like such a wimp, say it was just a
joke and act like everything�s normal� I can�t, I can�t fake it anymore� Yes, you can� No, I CAN�T~

Zell turned around and ran as fast as he could away from his
fear, leaving his best friend bewildered. He couldn�t see anyone�s faces as he
ran past them, nor could he understand what they were saying or shouting as he
pushed them past them. He wanted to get to his room; he needed to get there,
away from the threatening image of the gunblade, away from everyone. Finally he
reached his dorm, punched in the code and locked it once he was inside.
Exhausted from fighting and running and his fear he slumped against his bed,
grabbed his head and cried until he fell asleep. ~I hope you�re happy�Please, leave me alone, please~

TBC
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Insanity