Adult-FanFiction.org : Final Fantasy

My Mother, Thats Who I mean	By : Resting-Madness Category: Final Fantasy VIII > Yaoi - Male/Male > Irvine/Squall Views: 786 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in the Final Fantasy VIII universe not characters or places, nor the fandom itself. or the Espers mentioned from Final Fantasy VI and I make no profit from this story.

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
"Squall, can we talk?" Irvine whispered into the ear of the nearby dozer who's laying wrapped in his arms. Squall only opened his heavy eyelids a crack to say, silently, that he was listening. "I mean, you ain't gotta tell me or nothin' but... Why do you always get so quiet around this time of year?"
He asked as quickly as the words could leave his mouth before his senses caught up to him, telling him not to bother. That he would have eventually found out on his own or Squall would have told him; however, now his chances of ever knowing are blown, because his boyfriend will try to hide the issue better, after curtly saying to him...
"Its nothing." Squall answered, just as Irvine thought he would.
"Its something." Bucking his hips upward to nudge his love from his sleeping ruse, he asked again. "Come on, tell me. I won't laugh."
Rolling his eyes while they're still covered by his closed lids, Squall opened them and looked Irvine dead in the eyes. Smiling handsomely, he pulled himself up to kiss Irvine on the lips.
'Great, a distraction tactic.' Irvine mused while joining in the pleasant lip-lock. "Its not" His words were cut off by his choice to receive another smooch, but he finished it the moment Squall moved his lips to Irvine's jaw. "gonna work."
As if to say "Oh, won't it?" Squall grinds his hips down and up. He's feeling very pleased with himself when Irvine sighed pleasurably from this movement. Squall can feel the sniping "gun" hardening beneath his weight and the swelled meat is trying to rise up between the lion's slightly parting and clamping thighs. His plan to silence and distract Irvine had a couple cracks in it, though, because he hadn't considered what Irvine does to him, as well.
The gunman's hand started caressing down his spine causing him to moan when sturdy fingers traced the trench between his lower cheeks pausing long enough to swirl his thumb into Squall's tail bone, massaging it in deep circles little circles.
Hard to believe that normally something so unfamiliar, so invasive of one's personal space that you'd break the neck of someone who'd ever even think of touching you in such a way could become such a familiar and wanted feeling. This touch right here.. was Irvine in private; just like the voice his love used when speaking to him. His Galbadian accent would be gentle and just touching a change into words that aren't usually pronounced as they are when southern people say them, as opposed to when he's around everyone else in the world.
He liked to think that Irvine wanted to share this side of him, his subtleness with the person he loved most - being Squall. Its not bravado, Irvine told him outright once upon a time. That way admittance had him often wondering if he had any way of touching Irvine that comforted him? He knows that he uses a different tone with him when they are private, whether it be physical touches or simply sitting together.
"Mmm." Squall sighed out to breathless to moan as he arched into the touch.
But Irvine persisted with his quest of understanding. "Please?"
That was something about Irvine that sometimes bugged Squall. The Galbadian wanted to understand things. Anything. Even the smallest most insignifanct thing of the world around him. Mostly the people. Although he supposed if Irvine didn't have this quirk of a personal quest he'd never of been out there with him some of those rainy days back at the orphanage; never holding his hand; never talking to him in the stone home whenever Squall took a break from brooding and ended up in a room alone. But that was an assumption because without his knowing it, there was someone there with him. Someone who was nearly invisible to him.
Secretly, he liked having this newly learned knowledge about his mysterious childhood friend.
Even without dating he was there for him - true - Irvine was there for all of them. Yet, Squall felt it personally. Irvine didn't have to do any of those things; he didn't even have to remember he did them... But he did. And it mattered. So, maybe he owes Irvine a little more of himself. Things that he'd rather just keep hidden. But he'd easily share with Irvine, whatever his boyfriend wanted to know about himself - that could be seen in positive light. But his faults?
Everyone at Garden believes that Squall Leonhart is perfect; does no wrong; and even though his friends know better, he still holds that personal front for himself that maybe they don't know he's flawed. It's stupid of him, because people will always look to the stronger ones in times of crises, and because of this facade he's become one of those sought out people - not that he can't handle it. But most days he'd rather not be depended on.
Despite his revelations during his low and hard grind, again Squall rolled his eyes at his lover's insistance, thinking he must be losing his touch - granted, sexually, he ever had one. Irvine could kiss him into anything, fuck him into anything too. He was on the fence about his own prowess. If only the world knew about all the doubts their fearless leader sometimes has. Caving in to the bullet spray of grilling; he's kissing and nibbling at Irvine's neck trying to gather the right things to say then mumbled into the soft skin, almost wanting to be heard - yet not.
Cupping Squall's chin, Irvine turns the glaring gaze of attention to him so they're looking at each other. "I'm sorry?"
"I said... I'm constantly stabbed by guilt."
There it was again... guilt. Irvine had picked up on something like that his second year back after the disappearance scare. Squall had started to get all quiet on him off and on, on occasions around this month and March. But he had no idea what it was about or why? To Irvine Squall has no reasons to feel guilty over anything. Unless...
"It was around this month that..." Continuing the slow activity he'd initiated, being very in the mood himself now, and less in need to distract his love.
Squall reached between their thighs to part Irvine's legs to give him better access, after positioning himself to his love's entrance - with the slickness of their drying leakage from before mixed with the fresh batch they've been moving their hips through, he was able to slide right in with ease. He smirked in satifaction when Irvine tilted his head back into the pillows groaning, his inner walls clamped tightly around Squall's heated appendage.
Returning his mouth to Irvine's neck he spoke quietly between kisses. "I gave up on you."
"Hmm?"
"We had the funeral April sixth... I didn't go because I didn't believe it, a few days later I ended up sparring with Seifer and then my phone rang."
Squall pushed himself in and out of Irvine's body. Both of them became speech silent as they are momentarily caught up in the heat squirling through them, and less invested in the sought after conversation. The only words between them now are pants and sighs, grunts and moans as they are steamroller out of them. Pinning Irvine's arms up over his head so he can stop circling the tip of his middle finger around his entrance, Squall repositioned himself when Irvine's long legs wrapped around his waist, and continuing his thrust he also went on with what he'd been saying.
"It was a message from you - pre-recorded - and I knew then that it was over; I just gave up searching. You were gone in March, and even when everyone else stopped looking I kept at it..." He lowered his dual gaze in a sort of personal shame.
Tentively, he released his hold of Irvine's wrist grabbing his hips, he then lowered himself to fondle a pert brown nipple with his tongue, nipping at it roughly when he felt his lover's arms wrap around his back, one hand caressing up and down his spine soothingly.
Irvine stopped being tender with his touch and dug his nails snuggly into Squall's back beneath the shoulder blades. Their movements pick up causing the bed to join their noises. It practically dented the floor in, and if not, its definitely on the verge of knocking plaster down from the ceiling into the room beneath them.
"And that is what's been.." Irvine stopped to swallow over the dryness in his throat.
Squall lent him a hand by sticking his tongue into his mouth, their kiss was hard enough to clack their teeth together when they collided, and sturdy enough to bend them back into their mouths - metaphorically. Irvine turned his head to the side to moan when the lion's hand came to grip his member.
"...upsetting you every year?" He asked sort of choppy since his senses and use of them were blurring on how to function - his mouth and speech suffering the most from oncoming incoherence.
Squall could only nod in response; each time he'd pump the base of Irvine's member the sniper would clamp his inner walls around him, giving him the impression that - if alive - this is what a cigar felt when its being smoked. Delicious tightness of a mouth puffing on its base. Squall is fortunate enough to have a cavern for the entire stick.
"Well, shoot, that's nothing to feel guilty over. How long could you brood?" Irvine shifts his hips up, bucking them into the vice grip holding him wantingly hostage. "How long could you allow yourself to miss me before you'd realize it'd do no good in bringing me back, and that you'd have to get on with your life."
"As long as it took." Squall answered easily and without pause.
Looking into those blue-gray eyes misted in resolve while slitted in pleasure, Irvine smiled at him. "I know. If it were reversed I'd feel the same... But, we're back together now, and that's all that matters. We'll have our guilts and things, but eventually it'll pass." He brushed sweat soaked bangs aside from his lover's scarred forehead. Tracing it he smiled thoughtfully when Squall leaned into the cupping of his cheek. "Some time I'll tell you about my pains and guilts. But, thank you." Pulling him down to him, Irvine kissed him tenderly.
Hesitant, at first, with those words spoken to him, he now had new guilt and newfound wonders. But Squall joined in the kiss then continued stroking and thursting. Moans fill the room, the wet slapping sounds of sweating skin lapping against skin. Squall, though distracted at the moment, couldn't help but feel a worry in the back of his mind. But he can question Irvine when they're back at home together, for now, he needed a release other than verbally, so that he can clear his head.
# #
Kait closed the front door of of his home after he walked out. His big blue eyes cast their gaze left then right, then forward. It looked clear. Sneaking very carefully down the stairs to the street; he adjusts the straps of his backpack to secure them on his shoulders, then he darted away down the street. He had a talk with his grandfather just now about the situation, better to ask hard questions when you know time is strained, that way you won't be in too much trouble and the person you ask will have time to process it while you're away. They were eating breakfast at the time...
"Grandpa?" Kait said over a mouthful of eggs.
"Hmm?" Laguna chewed and swallowed his bite.
"Is it rude to ignore someone?"
Laguna had to think about that for a moment. There were lots of reasons to ignore someone actually. Better get more information before answering, he figured then asked. "Depends. Is the person calling you names or picking on you?"
Shaking his head, Kait replied. "No, nothing like that." He chose to take a few more bites before going on, Laguna waited patiently for him to speak again, and knowing this, the boy went on. "There's a woman, she's been around the area - - mostly I saw her at the park when I'm playing with my friends and stuff... she talked to all my friends asking about some kid and" He takes another bite making sure to properly chew and swallow before going on. "My friends said that she was asking, and then she came up to me but I ignored her. I thought that maybe I should since she's not a face I see everyday."
Laguna was sure that the boy meant that since they live in a such a small town he'd recognize every face that came around, and after 4 years Laguna is sure that Kait does. He's got a right to be nervous about new people, especially adults that wanna talk to him privately.
"What was she asking?"
"I think she might have lost her son; she keeps shouting out the name, Miles."
Saying it made Kait feel funny each time. He'd been, sort of, whispering it when taking his bath before bed. He also recalled how Seifer had said it. Does Seifer know where this kid is? And if he does, was he trying to see if maybe he, Kait, might know him and is hiding his whereabouts? He's definitely not. He's pretty sure he isn't.
"She said it over and over again like she was calling and maybe he'd hear her."
"Wow." Laguna scratched his head. "So you think that her son is missing?"
"Part of what I thought but," He quieted, then nodded as if to assure himself that saying what he's about to say will be alright. And so he added. "I also thought that maybe it was a trick. I seen it on tv once, a man was looking for a dog he didn't really have, and when a kid went to help him look he took her into a van and stole her away."
"Get outa here! Seriously?!" He sounded both shocked and amazed at how cunning some people can be.
Nodding, he sets his fork down, finished with his meal. He then leans over to check the time on the clock on the microwave. "So, should I talk to her? Or keep ignoring her?"
"Hmm, well, I think that you should listen to her and answer any questions, but" He made sure to be clear while speaking. "if she asks you to help her look, you run like the wind."
"Got it." He still felt uncertain. But then again, he has an Esper for a pet so, what's there to worry about? Pal will protect him for sure. And Laguna can walk with him, if he asks him to. But he won't. He's tough, just like his fathers. He doesn't need a hand to hold.
But it didn't stop him from running to school as fast as his little legs could take him.
"Um, Kait.."
The rushing child nearly fell to his knees he'd skidded to a stop so hard. Pal flapped its large wings and landed on the sidewalk from being projectiled from its perch. Looking around the area, he called out. "Huh?" Turning his gaze this way and that he finally spotted Raul walking down the sidewalk. 'Oh phew, its just Raul.' He thinks, turning his head when a wing brushed his ear from the bird returning to his shoulder.
"Can I walk to school with you?"
"Sure." He was elated to have human company; the shy boy doesn't even know how much he'd saved him a stomachache at the end of the day.
The two walk quietly along for a few good feet when the other boy turned to him and said in a very low and nervous tone. "Wo... Kait? Would you... I mean, you don't have to say, yes, or even get me anything but..." He stopped walking and knelt on the grass, removing his backpack from his back his digs around inside of it. "Here, please take this."
Taking the card, the brunet flips it open giving it a read. "Oh cool, you're having a birthday party this Saturday?"
"Uh-huh." He nods standing himself up then returning his bookbag around his shoulders to rest on his back, he starts walking towards the school.
"Great. I'll go shopping with my Grandpa for a gift after school. What kinda cake are you gonna have?" He had to know.
"I think my mom said chocolate."
"Oh boy! And with chocolate icing?"
"Maybe."
But Kait was already lost in thought of a heaping bite of chocolate cake.
"Um, but Kait..." Raul went on while watching the boy engage himself in a happy sort of march rather than natural stride. "Is it okay that you might be the only guy there?"
"Hmm? What do you mean?" He returned his pace to normal so that he could look his new friend in the eyes. "Like its an all girls party except the two of us?"
"No!" For all his shyness, Raul seemed appalled by that idea. "I mean, it might just be you and me at my house."
"How come? Are you new? Don't you know anyone else?"
That made the shy boy wanna crawl into a hole. "I do know kids, it's just... they don't usually pay much attention to me."
"Sure they will, you just have to give them a chance. Like you did with me." He threw his arm around the poor guy.
Raul resigned in informing the Leonhart or Kinneas child that he, Kait, was the one who'd sort of abducted him into his life, not the other way around.
"Trust me, Raul, your party is gonna be swarming with guys. I'll ask them if you're too nervous, but you have to do me a favor."
"Sure, what?" Raul wished he didn't sound so eager in his reply.
"Ask Antoine for yourself, I'll point him out to you." Kait craned his neck on ahead to where the school is now in view. "There he is, the one with glasses."
"But, I don't know him."
"Doesn't matter, just ask."
When the two kids reached the building, Antoine joined them greeting his best friend with a 'hello' and offering one to the new kid, who played with his fingers as if making a bunch of knots out of them before he said "Hi" in return. Something about that made Antoine smile. He wasn't sure what, but instead of walking beside his best friend he switched sides and walked next to this new boy. Kait couldn't have been happier when he saw it.
"Okay." He said out of the blue.
"Huh?" Raul looked at Kait.
"Don't mind him, his pet bird is magic and it can talk telepathically to him." Antoine explained when seeing Palidor depart for home once they'd reached the double-doors to go inside.
"Cool, really?"
"Yeah. This is my class. Bye, you guys." He gave Raul a hard stare as if to say, "Now's your chance - - don't blow it!". Then he darted into the classroom to take his seat.
"Antoine, was it?"
Was the last thing the Kinneas child heard before he was out of earshot. His parents will be so proud of him.
# #
"First thing I'm doing when we get back is buying that sweet gun in the new Weapons Monthly. I've put it off long enough. I've got my paycheck and its about to be well spent." Irvine said to Seifer, who's following him onto the F train headed for Balamb Town. Handing over the ticket to the checker behind the glass window, Irvine took the stub then walked over to a bench. "Check it out." He hands over the magazine.
Seifer flipped through it then, checking the gunblades first. Nothing new. Then he checked the guns section. "Gravedigger, huh?" He had to admit that for a gun, it was alright. Handing the magazine back, he then pulled something from his pocket. "Here." Seifer tapped a cigarette from his pack. He'd already gotten one out for himself and quickly lit up, taking in some much needed smoggy air as it hangs limply from the side of his mouth. "I still can't believe you smoke, moreso that you haven't told Leonhart."
"What'd be the point?" Irvine replied lighting up. "He always seems so agitated when it comes to my new little habits." He took a drag from it blowing the smoke into the air.
Seifer scoffed a laugh shaking his head in humor. "Well this is new. I thought you two were the living end of honesty and trust."
"We try to be, but we don't share everything - - nice as it would be - - no, sometimes we're too explosive to bother and we know exactly what to do, and say to set the other person off. We just leave it alone until the time is right."
Seifer cocked a fine brow to that comment. "Trouble in paradise?"
"No. Didn't say that." He took another puff.
The blond shrugged. He didn't care either way. "You're right, though, you shouldn't tell him," He added one last statement. "you look ridiculous smoking."
Chuckling, Irvine shoved Seifer's shoulder. "Bastard." Leaning himself back from the hunched position he'd been in he stretched his legs forward.
"I'm serious. And you know you can't hide smoking from him forever. I'm surprised you got away with it for this long. Cigarette smoke sticks to things."
"Well, if he ever catches a whiff I could just say you hugged me for a while." He grinned impishly.
"Yeah, you say that and I will "hug you" - - right 'til you've snapped in half."
"Aaaw, you say it but you don't mean it." He poked the snide blond in the cheek with his pinky finger.
"Yeah I do."
"Say, you wanna come by for dinner? It'll just be you at home anyway."
Seifer nodded then turned his attention out the window, his view being the sky, the tops of the trees, and a few telephone poles. Having nothing to conversate about, Irvine reached into his duffle and pulled out his whittling tools and a kitten-sized wooden statue that looked like it was shaping out to be a Moogle. He worked at it; wood chips peeling away and hitting the floor occasionally being kicked into a pile by Irvine's booted foot. He'd pick them up later into a resealable bag and throw them out.
After twenty minutes, Seifer took the item from Irvine's hands and looked it over like a boss would inspect it, turning it this way and that in his grasp before handing it back. Another 16 minutes and they'd be back home. Seifer planned to hit the gym then do a little shopping for some new boots. He hated to admit it to himself but the pair Squall had were pretty sweet, and he plans to get a pair - - different style of course - - but the same brand all the same. Show that pissy little lion who where's it better, much like their beloved gunblades.
Two kids came screaming down the aisle playing a game of tag with each other. Their mother sat on the bench doing some knitting, but she kept an eye on them. If only that mattered to the other passangers who were looking at the children as if they were destroying the world with their running around, and blasting out their eardrums with their yelling. Seifer wasn't sure who was more immature, the brats or the adults that take them into too much consideration when they should be ignoring them. He'd been around Squall and that kid of his long enough to not care about any kids noises or activities.
Kait considered that the world was playing with him whether they were or not; and he would often start boxing matches with his legs, or launch projectiles his and the others' way. So yeah, these kids don't have a thing on Kait's quirks. He wondered where the kid got that personality from, Squall said it was from hearing all those stories about Irvine. But hearing stories can't produce that; Squall must have been hiding a side like that, that the kid adopted into his own personality. And he was sure Selphie or Zell may have played a part in it as well.
Seifer let out a low laugh. Seeing Irvine glance at him, he replied to the unasked question. "I was just thinking about Leonhart behaving like a retard while raising the brat."
"What?" To Irvine, Seifer's words would have made more sense if he'd said: Last month I broke the world record for pulling my own teeth out without novicane.
"You know, to get him to laugh or whatever. I can't see pinched faced Squall being goofy for laughs." With a shrug he says. "I just think Kait would have turned out a lot more like the jerk Squall shows all of us than..." He trailed off as if to say: you know how the kid acts.
Thinking about it, Irvine nodded. "You're right. That is funny." Though he didn't laugh. "I still couldn't believe it the first time I heard him si-.." He cut himself off so hard it sounded as though someone had just strangled him.
"Heard him what?"
"Nothin' pardner," Seeing shade overhead, he stands. "We're here anyway." Packing his tools back into his bag he slings the strap over his shoulder.
"Uh-huh, I wouldn't get too comfortable with thinking you can hold it from me. I can get you to crack easily." He stands gathering his things as well.
"Not likely." Irvine replied waiting for the door to open.
"Tch. I only have to mention the word smoking around him and hint your name."
"You wouldn't." Irvine replied in good-humor because he knew that Seifer seriously wouldn't tell on him. "And you don't have anything that I want, so no bribe will work."
"Doesn't matter, its probably something lame that I could get out of Laguna easily anyway."
"Mhm." He rolled his eyes.
The two men depart and head down the street together. Irvine turned off from the usual path to his home; knowing that Kait would still be in school right about this time, he could stop by the Nautilis shop to get his gun. Seifer continued for home with plans of rest and a shower in mind. He's earned the break too, he was actually putting effort out into teaching someone other than his cadets the fine art of combat. He ordered them all to draw magic from a natural resorce then open fire on him while he showed them about junctioning to absorb it. He'd been nearly punch drunk with magic swell up by the end of it, but he made a good point; and a better portion of cadets really learned something from the lesson.
The others, well... they'll just have to go into the training center and hope for the fucking best, because he's not gonna repeat himself. He didn't have trouble learning how to junction - - and he had Trepe teaching him. Ha! So these people should learn it a lot easier from him then little-miss-technical. Honestly, anyone who understood her lessons should be given awards for succeeding when they've been given every opportunity to not.
Pushing open the front door after unlocking it, Seifer dropped his bag and began to strip before the door even thumped into the frame to close after the back of his foot kicked it. He should have taken a shower but he instead waited out the tub to fill with boiling hot water so he could soak his aching muscles. He passed through the kitchen for one of Zell's - Hyne awful - protein bars; after tearing it open he then strolls into the bathroom to check on the waters progress. Almost ready.
Seifer had to smirk at all his glory in the full-body mirror. He really is a God amongst men. Going into the bedroom, he grabbed a bottle of cologne then put it back. No sense in putting on a nice scent without anyone other than Dinky there to smell it. Turning off the water he steps into the tub with audible comfort as the water swells around him, the heat soothing his muscles. He'd left the light off so he could close his eyes without the red glare shining through his lids. He didn't plan on sleeping, the darkness just added to his comfort. A flash of his little blond lover flashed through his mind.
He hadn't gotten the proper send-off last night because Zell was just as tired as he was after teaching. Little weirdo actually found the exhaustion comforting. His hand lowered into the water and swished and brushed back and forth through the water over his member; far too tired even for masturbation, Seifer settled for a little stimulation. The water was doing just that as the current brushed by his member hard enough to blow it back and forth, the little ripples tickling like fingers playing his cock like a flute.
Seifer spent a good 40 minutes in the tub, he felt no need to bathe since he'd done that at the Dollet hotel last night, this was purely for comfort, and if he managed to get dirty between the time it took for him to wake up and head to the train station then he had some serious problems. Dressed in something old and comfortable - once finished with his soak, he dressed and then slipped on his sneakers; they're laced up quickly, and afterwards he grabbed a hand-towel and small bag to carry it, and a stick of deoderant. Time for the gym.
...
"You goin' home today?"
Laguna wondered if that was the kind of question that was a suggestion, or if Irvine was honestly asking if he planned on leaving right away. "Not if you don't want me to."
"Stay as long as you like, I like your company. Kait does too."
"Thanks." He beamed. Laguna always hated that weird feeling of being an unwanted guest. He rarely noticed things like that, but when he did it made his leg stiffen from nervesness. "You mind helping me with dinner tonight. We're having seafood pasta." He watched the son-in-law - in his head - move around the room.
"Sure."
"Sweet gun!" He walked over to touch the beauty that Irvine just unveiled. It was so nice to have his son in love with a man who had a fever for guns muchlike his own. He whistled as his hand slid across the stainless silver rimming and the solid black barrel. "Sawn-off."
"Better known to Estharians as 'Lupara', the wolf." Irvine added to his friend's words. "The shortened barrel makes it easier to conceal and manuever."
"And you bought the spreader chokes..." Laguna was practically drooling in awe.
"Expensive, but worth it."
Laguna nodded, whole-heartedly agreeing. Black and silver. It is a gorgeous piece of weaponry. Blinking himself out of the daze he'd just fallen into, he asked. "Wanna go to the store with me? I need to pick up some beef."
"Yeah, let me change first." He travelled into the hallway to get to his bedroom.
"Take your time." Laguna called after him. Lifting the gun from the case, he held it with a infatuated smile.
He rarely had reason to whip out a weapon anymore. At his age, fighting monsters seemed like the kind of thing that should be avoided if possible. But he's not out of shape and his body isn't too creaky as most 58 year olds start to feel the affects. The only real signs of aging are the wrinkles about his eyes, and the grey peppered hair. Although, he will be visiting the mountains of Trabia and Winhill to write his novel. He should have some form of protection. Maybe Irvine would let him borrow his former gun, since he'll undoubtedly be using this new model from now on. Not like he wouldn't give it back to the sniper. Setting the gun back into the case, he checked the clock on the wall. They had two hours before Kait got out of school.
Irvine entered the living room ten minutes later in a brown long sleeved shirt and black jeans, his hair pulled up into a higher ponytail. "Ready."
Laguna chuckled. "Aaah, youth. If I wore my ponytails that high I'd be seen as a creep trying to hard to stay young."
"Heh heh."
Opening the front door he stepped outside into the sunshine. "Julia always liked my hair, that's why I never cut it - only trims."
"I'm not sure how Squall feels about it... I think he likes it, he mentioned it before when we were on vacation." He stuffed his foot into his boot then followed Laguna outside. "Say Lag', I wanted to tell you that I'm glad you and Squall are closer now. I've always liked you. And trying to get him to open up to ya wasn't easy. What made him change his mind?"
"I talked to him when he shut down - - we had that much in common, at least. Too bad it had to be so tragic." He stuffed his hands into his pockets. "I don't think it's good to share tragedy, or sadness."
"No? I always thought it was good to have a bitching-buddy."
"No. It keeps you from moving on, if you only wanna vent." He sighed. "That's why I kept coming around after he adopted Kait. I thought that maybe we could just click together finally. Sure, its been a long time, but hey, its never too late to start something good."
Irvine nodded in agreement.
Laguna always longed for a relationship with Julia. It was kind of like how Squall had Kait after Irvine's disappearance. He'd lost Julia, but there was Squall. He had Ellone, too; through all the complications of loving the little girl with a special gift, it was worth it. And keeping hope alive for him and Squall was worth the pains of constant let downs and such. In the end it turned out great as well. Maybe someday he'll even have a son-in-law in real-time. He thought while glancing over at Irvine. Maybe.
...
"Just set them down over there, Zell." Quistis pointed.
"Next time someone asks me for a minute of my time, I'll lie and say I'm busy." He sets the three medium, in size but large in weight, boxes down onto the floor.
"They weren't that heavy." Quistis insisted to his exaggeratd breaths.
"Well if they weren't that heavy than why didn't you carry them yourself?" He asked. "Or at least one of them."
"I've got the clipboard." She said it as if that explained it all.
"Oh, that's fine."
Quistis shrugged innocently. A little something she got from Selphie perhaps?
"Was that all of it?"
"Yes, and thank you." Closing the door to the storage room, she locked it up with a key then started down the hall with Zell a few steps behind her.
"So you're really thinking about living in Dollet?" Her pooped-out friend asked. "Aren't you gonna spend a lot having to commute back and forth to Balamb?"
"Its not that long of a ride, so the fee isn't too bad. Besides, I've saved up enough."
"Yeah, for the meantime. But eventually, it'll get expensive."
Quistis shrugged. "I'll find a way to make it work. Besides, its been a long time coming and I need a place of my own. I'm a grown woman, Zell, I can't live in Garden forever. Selphie and Rinoa are doing the same thing."
"Yeah I know, and they're even crazier - - Timber! I mean, why can't you guys just get a place in Balamb?"
"Because, I don't want to live in Balamb. I've lived in Balamb town long enough."
Zell seemed taken aback by that. "Wha..what do you mean? Don't you like living there?"
"Sure. Its great, whatever, but I'd like a place to myself. A home I can call my own down to the location, you know what I mean?"
"Still sucks." He replied. "Remember what Sel' said back then, about how we'd all be together."
"Forever is a long time; and I'm not expelling myself from your lives." She stopped walking after saying this. "I will always be around because of work; and, if anything, my home will be the thing neglected." She sighed. "Zell, I love you all. You know I do, but this is my big change, just like it is for Selphie and Rinoa. Just like it was for Squall when he quit being commander, and adopted Kait. Even Irvine has made changes, and he still carves wooden things for the Shumi Tribe. We're all changing." Her heart was sinking over the sight of her friend's shoulders slumped in defeat. "Come on, don't make me feel this way. I'm moving, not moving on." She cupped his chin. "So, don't freak out."
"Yeah, okay... But will you be sure to visit a lot?"
"You know I will."
"I hope you will."
Quistis turned her gaze away from the puppy dog stare and started down the hall again, walking onto the elevator, waiting for Zell to get on before pressing the botton.
"Do the others know?" He asked just out of curiosity.
"Not yet, I thought I'd tell everyone over lunch or something." She had told Zell privately just now only because he'd been small-talking her to death over the most boring topic known to most women - - weight lifting.
He'd gone on about getting his cadets into a regiment and having them bulk up for battle sequences in the training center. Finally she had just about enough and decided to tell him about moving. Quistis actually wanted to tell Squall first. He seems to have the hardest separation anxieties out of everyone in the group. Better to break it to him first then tell the others. But here's Zell a little spooked at the idea too. She didn't see why, she wasn't exactly an enormous part of his life - - physically anyway. And she really was going to be around more than he knew, so he had no reason to be so upset.
Zell piped. "And hey maybe someday you'll get married or something? Won't that be funny?"
Looks like he recovers faster than she would have guessed. Giving her delusional friend a shove that says: get real. She couldn't help but smile at the thought. Imagine. Married.
# #
Mara waited and waited for the bell to ring. She knew when school ended, she'd watched the building long enough this past month. She can have a quick discussion with Kait, and prove that he either is or is not her son. Though she's damned sure that he is. Everything makes sense, everything adds up. It has to be Kait, because if he isn't than she doesn't know what she's going to do if she has to stop her search to return to her current life, only to end up taking more time off to start her search all over again. Ground zero is not a good place to be. That's how she had been for far too long after that picnic in the woods with her husband that fateful day...
The bell chimed, and quickly - as if they had been piled at the exit to get out - children and tweens exited the school. Craning her neck to look for the short child, she walked a distance away in order to make it seem as if she had just walked up rather than that she had been waiting. Person after person came out of the building, and finally the little boy showed up. He's carrying a case in his hand, it looks like an instrument case. Mara had to smile at the thought of her child playing an instrument. It'd be a first in her family, her husband's too.
"Uh-oh." He said almost instantly upon seeing her. Holding his arm out with the free hand, he let Pal perch on his arm before the bird moved up to his shoulder.
"What "uh-oh"?" Antoine asked.
"It's that lady again."
Raul looked around then asked. "The one from yesterday?"
"Uh-huh. I'm gonna go talk to her." He decided. "May as well get it over with. I mean, if it were me lost, I'd want my parents to do whatever it took."
The two other boys nod in agreement.
Back straight, face determined to end this little bout of trespassing into his comfortable life once and for all, the eight-year-old marched forward.
Mara's was pleased to see the child coming over to her willingly. It would look bad if she approached him. Her fingers began to knit together from her nerves. He was about six feet away before he stopped dead.
"Mr. Irvine!" Antoine was heard shouting. "Hi!" He waved then called over his shoulder. "Kait, it's your dad!"
The boy looked as though he were about to explode with joy. His eyes all wide and teeth showing through a parted grin. Mara was surprised Kait didn't outright scream from inability to contain himself, as he spun around and sped off towards a tall man with long hair. He must be the 'mother' of the homosexual relationship Squall Leonhart is in. Pityful. She shook her head in distaste. A bitterness tinged her eyes; but she did recognize the man. He had said "hello" to her one morning or afternoon. He's at least friendly. Perhaps she could speak with him about the situation. But later. Right now would do no good. Kait's thoroughly distracted.
"Papa, remember how I thought I left my flute in my cubby in homeroom? It was there alright." He raised the case into Irvine's view. Looking out over his father's head, when Irvine picked him up, he glanced around the area to see if that woman was still standing around.
He'd feel much better speaking with her with Irvine present. He'd like to see her steal him away, if that is her plan, with a bigshot like his father around. But he didn't see her. She must have left. That didn't exactly make him feel better about the situation either. It was almost like his worries were true and she did wanna snatch a kid. Why else would she hide out and wait to get them alone? Looking down into his father's handsome face, Kait hugged him. It was a hug that screamed: never let me go, and he smiled feeling the same hug in return.
"Tell me everything - - oh wait!" He wriggled himself to be let down. "This is my new friend, his names Raul; he invited me to a birthday party Saturday, ya know." It was a metaphorical suspender snap announcement.
"Nice to meet you, kiddo." Irvine offered a hand to the boy, and the kid sort of cowared away, but grabbed some nerve when Antoine patted him on the back that it was alright. So he shook the man's hand.
"He asked me to go, too, Mr. Irvine." Antoine chimed in.
"Great." He replied.
Kait took his father's hand when they began to walk for home. "Can we get him a good present later on? How tall am I?"
Irvine answered any and every question the boy could shoot at him; and they all stopped by the park to hang out, since Kait didn't have any homework. In the distance Mara watched the two. It was hard not to be jealous. She still didn't know whether or not her suspicions were true, but the feeling that Kait is her son is too overwhelming. She can't help but feel cheated out of her child's life. It was nice to see, though it hurt, that if Kait were her child he's at least loved.
A small smile touched her lips hearing Irvine making airplane sounds, arms spread out as he pretended to fly around the park; that bird flapped after them like it was intelligent and thought its own thoughts, and was playing as well. The other two boys were going up and down the slide before becoming airplanes as well leaving the runway.
"It's sweet isn't it?"
Startled, Mara turned around and nearly lost her wits seeing the former president of Esthar standing beside her.
"Oh... yes, it is." She replied nervously. What on earth was a man like him doing here?
"He's my grandson, the shorter one." He pointed at Kait. "And the big one is a friend of mine."
"Oh, so he's your grandson?" She inquiried. "Are you related to his mother or his father?"
"Father. And I tell ya, it's so great that he's got Kait. I never got to be a father to him when he was younger. I was a soldier." He stated, as if she should already have known something like that. "He ended up being raised at a sort of orphanage in the South islands. A woman I used to like named Raine took care of him - my son that is - until uhh..." He scratched the back of his head. "Well, anyhow, he never knew me and grew up, and actually had a hard time accepting me as anyone other than some big goof-ball he wanted nothing to do with."
"That must have been horrible for you." Mara meant it. She didn't know if she could stand it if her son didn't want her.
"He didn't know - - hell, I didn't know. Not until Raine told me about it. Its a long story. Anyhow, we're somewhat close now but, I missed out on his younger years... but having Kait around made up for that."
Mara nodded stiffly. May as well press the issue. "It must be hard not knowing who your parents are. Is your son a good father? Or does he let his wife do all the work. I've known men who think of children as nothing but a burden."
"Really? How strange. I've never known any man to not want a child. I myself worked hard to get to know my son when I found out the truth."
"They're jerks really," She said the words quickly trying to get back on subject. "So, he's a good father? Even without having had you around to raise him?"
"Yeah, he's amazing. A woman named Edea Kramer watched over him until he went to military school."
"So, he grew up alright with just a female influence?"
"Yeah. Kait's only got a male influence, and he's growing up great. But he's got women in his life."
"Oh!" She tried to sound surprised. "So he's a single father?"
"No. He's in a serious relationship with that guy over there." He nods his head at Irvine.
Nodding, she rubbed her hands together. "And what does the wife or girlfriend think about his choice of relationship - - the influence around her son?"
"No wife. Kait's adopted."
"And your son just decided to get a child, how gallant."
"Actually, Irvine found the baby. In the Timber forest, he was up in a tree of all places." Laguna laughed. "Sounds weird, right, but the baby was just abandoned there. Irvine refused to leave him. He took him in, and next thing you know they ended up adopting him." He shrugged, as if it was that simple. Their kindness and love is that full that it can spread to anyone or anything they so choose to place it upon.
'That clenches it. Timber forest, adopted. Kait is my son.' Mara felt sick at the sudden surge of adreniline that spread through her veins.
Laguna Loire really helped her out. But now a new problem came to her. How to bring it up without scaring them. If the two men really love him all that much, and she's sure that Miles loves them in return. How can she bring it up? How can she get them to see that he belongs to her, and should be returned to his rightful place?
"I should go." She said hastily turning away. "Thank you."
Laguna made a face in wonder of what he was being thanked for, but waved her off all the same. Smiling, he joined Irvine and Kait on the playground claiming the swing after the boy was finished.
- 6
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My Mother, Thats Who I mean