Tulips Are Better
folder
Final Fantasy VII › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
2
Views:
788
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Final Fantasy VII › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
2
Views:
788
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Tulips Are Better
Warnings: Shonen~Ai, Incest, Slight AU.
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be.
/lyrics/
-Thoughts-
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
Fingertips on ivory skin, leaving the smallest of red marks. He wanted his eyes to close, but his ears would still be assaulted by their sounds. The image was blurring from the tears in his eyes, but the picture would be burnt upon his eyelids for weeks, months, to come. Eventually the tears fell and left him to see again; he wanted to pull away from the door, he hadn’t meant to see, why did he have to see?
/Crystal clear, I see the rose is frail/
It hurt, oh did it hurt when he finally managed to tear himself away from the sight and launch across the hall to his room, onto a bed chilled by the spring air that drifted into his bedroom. Fingertips played over the seam of his bedcovers, and tears spilt over onto his pillow. He could still hear them, how he could have missed if before, he didn’t know. Nails shredded through blankets and pillows, fisting his hands in the downy stuffing.
/The thorns hid easily in its beauty, as I go to grasp it in my hand./
A millennia later, footsteps echoed outside his room, hushed words playing over ears that he just wished would forget to hear. The silence of a stolen kiss and the footsteps drifted away, Kadaj launched himself from his bed and shut his door roughly against the echoing sounds that played through his head. Nails drug roughly over the wooden door, not satisfied until they threatened to rip from the root.
/My heart is torn beating from my chest./
Doubt filtered through his thoughts, the hopeful whimper that rose in his throat was stifled as he ran to the window, hoping against hope. But there they were, the beauty of them together made him nauseous, “How could you, Yazu..?” The frail whisper broke through the fading sunlight unanswered.
/Let me be captivated, by your beauty./
Kadaj found himself wondering how long, why…why would his brother do this to him. Nails dug into palms and he was lashing out at the half-opened window, shattering it and the vision beyond it of his elder brother and Strife in a tender kiss.
/Then let me fall from your grace, unto my broken knees/
He was bleeding, he could feel the drops sliding off his sliced knuckles, could hear them puddling on the floor, could smell the faint coppery scent. Eventually he gathered himself up enough to inch swiftly across the hall and lock himself in the bathroom to clean up his hand, tears mixing with the crimson stained water.
/Close my eyes so tightly, the tears are welling up./
He couldn’t stop the tears that continued to well up in his eyes, or the small sobs that slipped from his lips. How could he face him after this? Surely Yazu didn’t know he’d seen, but he couldn’t…tear-filled emerald eyes lifted to peer at his reflection and he was sickened by his own weakness, “I hate you.” The words were spoken at the mirror, but who they were meant for, only the boy knew. More footsteps echoed and he swiftly moved to turn on the shower just as a voice filtered through the door, “Kadaj..?” His brother. How could he speak to him. Shooting a glare at the door, one that could have scorched the wood, he spoke up, “What Yazu?”
/You aren't worth the waste, of the salt or the water./
“Your window’s broken, Otoutou, are you okay?” Such worry, if Kadaj had less control, the man on the other side of the door would have been killed, “Of course I am, it was an accident.” The teen’s words left no room for argument, “Oh, okay, Kadaj…well, be more careful next time.” And the footsteps were retreating back to the elder’s bedroom. -Probably to clean his room-, Kadaj thought bitterly as he stripped and ducked under the shower spray.
/Fuck all your false beauty, it was transparent just like your smile - liar./
The teen sat on the bottom of the stall, letting the water pelt down on him until it began to turn cold and forced him to move. The cold only aided in numbing the burning behind his eyes and the pain radiating from the jagged cuts on his fist. A towel was secured around his waist, and after pressing his ear to the door to make sure Yazu was no where to be heard, he darted back across the hall and into his empty bedroom, eyes flitting from the broken window that had been taped over to the lack of glass shards on the floor.
/Your thorns caress my flesh, crimson drops on a snowy field - liar.
Kadaj would have stayed locked in his room if he’d been so able, but a knock sounded only moments after he’d finished dressing, “Otoutou, aren’t you going to come eat dinner? Nii-san stopped by to see us.” -…Nii-san-, Kadaj’s nose wrinkled bitterly, -He’s only here to see you-. But the teen forced on an unemotional tone, “I’ll be down.” He promised, letting out a long breath once the footsteps retreated once more.
/I have watched you retrogress, I have seen what you've become - liar./
As promised, Kadaj found himself staring down at a bowl of soup moments later, Cloud and Yazu carrying on a conversation that would have been normal, but Kadaj wasn’t blind to it any more, he seen the way their eyes lit upon the sight of the other, the small touches and gestures meant for only each other’s eyes. -Fuck them-, he thought, -I don’t need them, I don’t need his love, I never did.-
/Please take your eyes off of me./
Skin prickled and Kadaj lifted his eyes to meet Cloud’s questioning look, “You’re quiet, Kadaj, is something wrong?” Yazu’s concerned eyes flitted to his brother. -‘Bout time you take notice of something other than *him*, Aniki-, he snarled mentally, only barely managing to keep his angry thoughts from showing in his eyes, “I’m not hungry.” Pushing the untouched bowl away the boy stood quickly and turned towards the back door, “I’m going for a walk, I’ll be back later.” As he pushed the door open he could hear Cloud shush his brother as he attempted to stop and ask Kadaj what was wrong, could hear the blonde tell Yazu that he was just being a moody teenager.
/It's funny how fast blue eyes fade gray - liar./
“I hate you..” Kadaj whispered to himself, jumping off the porch and slipping out of sight of the house, towards the ongoing fields. The boy settled against the curve of the hill were it slid down into the small creek, “I hate you both..” His chin settled on his knees and he once again forced back tears, sniffling hard, “I hate you both!” Chucking small stones at the water, he grit his teeth with a low whimper, “…Why couldn’t you love me instead..?”
/And you are deceit./
It wasn’t until many hours later that Kadaj had enough of a hold on himself to climb out of the small gully the creek had carved into the hill and made his way back to the house. Toeing off mud-caked shoes he slid silently into the dark house, pausing in the living room doorway to glare at the sight before him. Both Yazu and Cloud were asleep, curled in an embrace as the TV played quietly in front of them. Kadaj’s lips curled in a small sneer, “I hate you both..” He murmured to himself, then moved past to the stairs and swiftly pounding his way up them; content in the sudden crash from the floor below that signaled one or both of the lovers tumbling to the floor as one woke up swiftly.
/Watching the sun play in your hair./
After completing the ritual of locking his door, the teen slid into bed and curled up, hating himself much more than Cloud and Yazu combined. He should have been happy for them, he knew that, but it was hard to be when he loved Yazu. He’d always loved his aniki, whether in the gentle, sweet way of a younger brother, or the passionate, needful way of a lover. It’d always been part of him, so he stopped questioning it. Fingers found the groove left behind by his nails from hours ago, it felt like an eternity since he’d seen the two of them together, and he still felt like hell. He wanted someone to die for what he felt. He wanted to die. He wanted Strife to die. Curling up tightly, he drew the blankets over his head and attempted to muffle his sobs. -They will never know I know-, He promised himself, eyes closing as he drifted into an exhausted sleep, -I’ll die before I let them act like that in front of me. I’ll die before I sit there and watch them trade kisses and loving glances.-
/I couldn't really care, care any less about you.
Just wither away, real beauty is forever in you.
Just wither away./
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be.
/lyrics/
-Thoughts-
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
Fingertips on ivory skin, leaving the smallest of red marks. He wanted his eyes to close, but his ears would still be assaulted by their sounds. The image was blurring from the tears in his eyes, but the picture would be burnt upon his eyelids for weeks, months, to come. Eventually the tears fell and left him to see again; he wanted to pull away from the door, he hadn’t meant to see, why did he have to see?
/Crystal clear, I see the rose is frail/
It hurt, oh did it hurt when he finally managed to tear himself away from the sight and launch across the hall to his room, onto a bed chilled by the spring air that drifted into his bedroom. Fingertips played over the seam of his bedcovers, and tears spilt over onto his pillow. He could still hear them, how he could have missed if before, he didn’t know. Nails shredded through blankets and pillows, fisting his hands in the downy stuffing.
/The thorns hid easily in its beauty, as I go to grasp it in my hand./
A millennia later, footsteps echoed outside his room, hushed words playing over ears that he just wished would forget to hear. The silence of a stolen kiss and the footsteps drifted away, Kadaj launched himself from his bed and shut his door roughly against the echoing sounds that played through his head. Nails drug roughly over the wooden door, not satisfied until they threatened to rip from the root.
/My heart is torn beating from my chest./
Doubt filtered through his thoughts, the hopeful whimper that rose in his throat was stifled as he ran to the window, hoping against hope. But there they were, the beauty of them together made him nauseous, “How could you, Yazu..?” The frail whisper broke through the fading sunlight unanswered.
/Let me be captivated, by your beauty./
Kadaj found himself wondering how long, why…why would his brother do this to him. Nails dug into palms and he was lashing out at the half-opened window, shattering it and the vision beyond it of his elder brother and Strife in a tender kiss.
/Then let me fall from your grace, unto my broken knees/
He was bleeding, he could feel the drops sliding off his sliced knuckles, could hear them puddling on the floor, could smell the faint coppery scent. Eventually he gathered himself up enough to inch swiftly across the hall and lock himself in the bathroom to clean up his hand, tears mixing with the crimson stained water.
/Close my eyes so tightly, the tears are welling up./
He couldn’t stop the tears that continued to well up in his eyes, or the small sobs that slipped from his lips. How could he face him after this? Surely Yazu didn’t know he’d seen, but he couldn’t…tear-filled emerald eyes lifted to peer at his reflection and he was sickened by his own weakness, “I hate you.” The words were spoken at the mirror, but who they were meant for, only the boy knew. More footsteps echoed and he swiftly moved to turn on the shower just as a voice filtered through the door, “Kadaj..?” His brother. How could he speak to him. Shooting a glare at the door, one that could have scorched the wood, he spoke up, “What Yazu?”
/You aren't worth the waste, of the salt or the water./
“Your window’s broken, Otoutou, are you okay?” Such worry, if Kadaj had less control, the man on the other side of the door would have been killed, “Of course I am, it was an accident.” The teen’s words left no room for argument, “Oh, okay, Kadaj…well, be more careful next time.” And the footsteps were retreating back to the elder’s bedroom. -Probably to clean his room-, Kadaj thought bitterly as he stripped and ducked under the shower spray.
/Fuck all your false beauty, it was transparent just like your smile - liar./
The teen sat on the bottom of the stall, letting the water pelt down on him until it began to turn cold and forced him to move. The cold only aided in numbing the burning behind his eyes and the pain radiating from the jagged cuts on his fist. A towel was secured around his waist, and after pressing his ear to the door to make sure Yazu was no where to be heard, he darted back across the hall and into his empty bedroom, eyes flitting from the broken window that had been taped over to the lack of glass shards on the floor.
/Your thorns caress my flesh, crimson drops on a snowy field - liar.
Kadaj would have stayed locked in his room if he’d been so able, but a knock sounded only moments after he’d finished dressing, “Otoutou, aren’t you going to come eat dinner? Nii-san stopped by to see us.” -…Nii-san-, Kadaj’s nose wrinkled bitterly, -He’s only here to see you-. But the teen forced on an unemotional tone, “I’ll be down.” He promised, letting out a long breath once the footsteps retreated once more.
/I have watched you retrogress, I have seen what you've become - liar./
As promised, Kadaj found himself staring down at a bowl of soup moments later, Cloud and Yazu carrying on a conversation that would have been normal, but Kadaj wasn’t blind to it any more, he seen the way their eyes lit upon the sight of the other, the small touches and gestures meant for only each other’s eyes. -Fuck them-, he thought, -I don’t need them, I don’t need his love, I never did.-
/Please take your eyes off of me./
Skin prickled and Kadaj lifted his eyes to meet Cloud’s questioning look, “You’re quiet, Kadaj, is something wrong?” Yazu’s concerned eyes flitted to his brother. -‘Bout time you take notice of something other than *him*, Aniki-, he snarled mentally, only barely managing to keep his angry thoughts from showing in his eyes, “I’m not hungry.” Pushing the untouched bowl away the boy stood quickly and turned towards the back door, “I’m going for a walk, I’ll be back later.” As he pushed the door open he could hear Cloud shush his brother as he attempted to stop and ask Kadaj what was wrong, could hear the blonde tell Yazu that he was just being a moody teenager.
/It's funny how fast blue eyes fade gray - liar./
“I hate you..” Kadaj whispered to himself, jumping off the porch and slipping out of sight of the house, towards the ongoing fields. The boy settled against the curve of the hill were it slid down into the small creek, “I hate you both..” His chin settled on his knees and he once again forced back tears, sniffling hard, “I hate you both!” Chucking small stones at the water, he grit his teeth with a low whimper, “…Why couldn’t you love me instead..?”
/And you are deceit./
It wasn’t until many hours later that Kadaj had enough of a hold on himself to climb out of the small gully the creek had carved into the hill and made his way back to the house. Toeing off mud-caked shoes he slid silently into the dark house, pausing in the living room doorway to glare at the sight before him. Both Yazu and Cloud were asleep, curled in an embrace as the TV played quietly in front of them. Kadaj’s lips curled in a small sneer, “I hate you both..” He murmured to himself, then moved past to the stairs and swiftly pounding his way up them; content in the sudden crash from the floor below that signaled one or both of the lovers tumbling to the floor as one woke up swiftly.
/Watching the sun play in your hair./
After completing the ritual of locking his door, the teen slid into bed and curled up, hating himself much more than Cloud and Yazu combined. He should have been happy for them, he knew that, but it was hard to be when he loved Yazu. He’d always loved his aniki, whether in the gentle, sweet way of a younger brother, or the passionate, needful way of a lover. It’d always been part of him, so he stopped questioning it. Fingers found the groove left behind by his nails from hours ago, it felt like an eternity since he’d seen the two of them together, and he still felt like hell. He wanted someone to die for what he felt. He wanted to die. He wanted Strife to die. Curling up tightly, he drew the blankets over his head and attempted to muffle his sobs. -They will never know I know-, He promised himself, eyes closing as he drifted into an exhausted sleep, -I’ll die before I let them act like that in front of me. I’ll die before I sit there and watch them trade kisses and loving glances.-
/I couldn't really care, care any less about you.
Just wither away, real beauty is forever in you.
Just wither away./
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_