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Crack	By : wickedorin Category: Final Fantasy VII > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 666 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Crack
- 1
"Crack is Good" and the general sexiness/wrongness
of "Crack is Good" is completely copyright Orin Drake 2006. The ideas
for this are blamed entirely upon Cosmotwitch for putting the idea of Cloud
+ Reno + Zack = Crack into my head, and "Snap" (a.k.a. Orin's insane husband)
for the initial challenge: "Write some yaoi about dropping the remote in
front of a video game console." All characters contained within are
owned (and sometimes "pwned") by Square-Enix. Not mine. I've
tried and failed to make them mine. Believe me.

        Background:
Could there ever possibly be a good reason for this? It was...
a challenge. In a lot of ways. Oh boy. Takes place at
some AU point where Cloud is around 15 and he and Zack were still in training
together... and Reno was hangin' around... like Reno would probably do.
I'm not saying this makes sense. So don't pretend it does.

Crack is Good

by Orin Drake

        It
was Saturday night. And everybody was out. Everybody.

        Except
Cloud, of course. No one ever invited him out... not that he'd accept.
He'd heard enough stories from Zack about what happened when everyone got
together and got drunk--someone always wound up pantless in an alley in
the morning. Strangely, that person never seemed to be Zack...

        No
matter. At least everyone being out meant no one would bother him.
Being alone was okay. He was used to it. And really, it wasn't
so bad when one had a nice new video game console in the room, all to themselves.

        --Or
so he'd thought, until he'd heard a knock at the door. Sure he could
have ignored it...

        Actually,
he couldn't have. The knocking seemed to shift rather quickly
into someone insanely slamming their whole body into the door... and only
one person would pull something like that.

        "Reno!"
Cloud shouted at the door. "Give it a rest!"

        Silence.
The kid was fine with being acknowledged. Not that he wouldn't have
gladly continued if the door hadn't opened when it did. He gave a
chuckle when he gained a glance inside. "Nice jammies."

        The
blond glared. "Well, no one was supposed to be here. I thought
I could spend the evening in comfort, thanks." Yeah they were old
and worn, but... he liked his moogle pajamas. He just... didn't usually
like to show them off. "You wanted something?"

        "Yeah."
Reno sloughed off the non-invitation. "I felt like wandering around.
Got bored. And I know you've got games in there."

        "And
what do I get out of it?" Cloud dared to ask, knowing it was never a decent
exchange.

        "Dinner?"
the redhead suggested, holding up the plate wrapped in foil that he'd been
hiding.

        --Well.
That was tempting, despite the fact that inviting Reno anywhere
was always a bad idea. He stood aside and closed the door after boy
and food were safely inside.

        Without
waiting, the foil was torn off. Cloud peered over at... a plate of
fries. Drenched in ketchup. "That's your dinner?"

        Reno
just grinned and shrugged. "You got something better, huh?"

        "Well...
no..." Honestly, he hadn't even thought about food until then.
Though, since it was mentioned... he was kinda hungry...

        "So."
The redhead interrupted. "Where are your video games?"

        Cloud's
eyes narrowed. "Still bored, huh?"

        "Yeah!
And as a guest, I really should be entertained." It seemed rational
enough.

        The
blond just shook his head and went about what he'd been doing before his
"guest" had arrived. Televisions were found in every room... but
gaming systems weren't allowed. So, obviously, it had to be hidden
under a mattress. Cloud went about pulling out the controllers and
setting everything up, having learned from the best exactly what he needed
to do to override the "security features" on the TV that weren't supposed
to allow that sort of thing.

        Speaking
of "the best"--there was an astoundingly familiar knock. Another
knock. Only that time, Reno had the gaul to answer it himself.

        "Hey!"
Cloud protested, knowing it was useless. It just felt better.
It wasn't as if he didn't know who was on the other side of the door, anyway.

        "Reno!"
came the surprised yell from outside. "Hey Spike! You having
a party and didn't invite me?"

        He
shook his head and sighed at Zack. "I thought you were both
supposed to be
out."

        His
friend gave him a well-faked hurt expression. "What, don't want us
here?"

        Cloud
rolled his eyes. "I didn't expect you to be back until someone dragged
you here. Literally. Too drunk to crawl."

        Zack
perked up again when he saw the gaming console all set up and ready for
bet-taking and competition. "Well, yeah. I was going to but
there wasn't room in the car and... well, nevermind. One Saturday
night with my best friend won't kill me!"

        "Gee.
Thanks." Said friend mumbled, handing out the controllers and going
through the games.

        "Oh."
As usual, the wild-haired boy realized his mistake too late. "I didn't
mean it that way! I like hangin' out with you, Spike!"

        "And
what am I?" Reno called, lazily sprawled out on the floor in front of the
TV, eating the fries slowly.

        "A
real fun wanna-be Turk with french fries! Can I have some?"
Zack nearly pounced on top of him for the food.

        "Geez,
yes." The boy replied, pushing him away. "Just... relax, there."

        The
oldest of the three (in physical age only) sat back with a pleased expression...
and a couple of fries. "C'mon, Spike! We got gaming to do!"

        "I'm
getting there." Cloud mumbled back, trying to get the TV on.
It was a delicate process--of hitting the remote button several times in
a row, hard enough to get it to work. Really, the best security feature
on a Shin-Ra television set was the fact it didn't turn on all that
often. He moved back a bit... then further forward... then directly
in front of the censor. He even shook the remote, several times,
and pondered drop-kicking it for his own amusement.

        Oops.
Dammit, dropped the remote. He thought nothing of it, really; he
was clumsy like that. He bent over quickly to pick it back up.

        A
number of things happened at that instant that he wasn't aware of.
The look that the two boys behind him exchanged, for instance. The
simultaneous dropping of controllers. The rise in heart rate.
The many conversations had about him before that moment.

        Zack
did it. He broke... and took matters into his own hands. Literally.

        Cloud
was so surprised that he couldn't even yelp. Two very warm hands
had settled over his ass.

        All
things became stillness. Totally unmoving. No one breathed,
no one blinked. Even Reno was motionless and gaping.

        "...Zack..?"
came a very timid voice from the blond, still bent over and reaching toward
the remote.

        "...Yes..?"
he tried very hard not to sound as surprised as he felt.

        Another
long moment of silence stretched over the room before Cloud found his voice
again. "Is there a reason you're grabbing my ass?"

        A
good question, he had to admit. "Yes."

        At
least the pause was shorter that time. "Could you tell me what that
reason is? Please? Now?"

        Zack
shrugged--but did not move his hands. "Because it... seemed like
the right thing to do."

        Clearly,
they were getting nowhere with conversation. Cloud glanced over his
shoulder in Reno's direction to see if he had a better explanation...
but only found him watching on with a half amused, half fascinated expression
on his face, eating french fries one at a time. Alright, no help
there. He looked over his other shoulder at the boy groping him and
tried to come up with an appropriate question. "Why would that ever
seem like the right thing to do?"

        Even
with a mild and very foreign look of embarrassment playing over his face,
Zack managed the hint of a grin. "I dunno. It just... seemed
like a good opportunity."

        Finally,
the blond stood up straight and shifted away from the touch... but had
absolutely no idea of what to say or do next. He must have been blushing
by then... and dammit but he was... confused. Really, utterly baffled
by recent events. Or maybe in shock. Possibly all of the above
and then some. Yeah, probably that last one.

        When
the boy didn't speak or turn around, Zack actually became worried.
"Uh, Spike..? Look, man... I..."

        "Pft."
Reno made a scoffing sound, placing his plate of fries safely on the bunk
next to him and wiping his hands on his pants. "Dude." He addressed
Zack, cool as ever. "If he had a problem with it, I think he would
have knocked your head off. Cloud's kinda quiet, but he's got that
whole 'rage under the surface' thing going on."

        The
other two boys marveled at the redhead's occasional lucidity. It
was always... surprising. And usually pegged him as a bit more aware
of what was going on than anyone actually liked him to be.

        Cloud
blinked at the sudden realization that no one in the room seemed surprised
by Zack's actions. --Not even himself. That was enough reason
to remain silent.

        As
if just realizing the same thing, Zack's blank face slowly changed into
a rather... feral expression. It was a damn good thing his best friend
wasn't looking just then; he'd probably have run off and never come back,
dreams of SOLDIER be damned. Reno had a point, surprisingly enough.
They gave each other a too-knowing look as the blond continued to blend
into the television.

        Reno
moved first, off the ground and pulling Cloud against his body in one fluid
motion. Good thing the kid was too shocked to react; it would have
made the redhead's next move a hell of a lot harder. Somehow he'd
turned the blond and gotten him to kneel in front of him while kneeling
himself, knees meeting--Cloud's wrists firmly in his grasp so he didn't
get punched. The Turk-in-training pushed his luck to the limit when
he transferred both potential weapons to one hand, tugging a controller
away from the console with the other and looping the cord numerous times
around the trapped boy's wrists.

        Cloud's
eyes were absolutely enormous as he tried to comprehend the events that
had lead up to being bound and pulled against Reno's body. Even more
shocking were the low, smooth words purred directly behind him. "Give
me one reason we shouldn't fuck you straight to paradise, Spike."

        He
was pretty sure his heart stopped. Or exploded. Something
had to have ceased to exist in that moment, because nothing was the same.
He fought to understand anything, trying to choose between catatonic
numbness and actual comprehension. He wasn't ready! ...Was
he..? No, of course not. Fantasies and what was actually happening
were completely different things... weren't they..? The only response
he found himself able to express was quite mechanical.

        "Lubrication!"
He blushed immediately upon speaking the word--but he knew being aware
of that much might save him from a situation he did not want to be in.
"There's not even any lotion in the bathroom!" Not that he was at
all going to admit to why... especially not when the smirk he'd
caught in Reno's eyes before he looked away told him that it wasn't a secret.

        For
one tiny sliver of a moment, Zack seemed to see his point. Right
up until his eyes lit up again with a brilliant idea. He motioned
at Reno for the plate of fries... and ketchup.

        Unfortunately,
Cloud saw--and somehow immediately knew what was being planned. He
struggled, moaning with disbelief and embarrassment and... and just the
sheer possibilities... "No, Zack! That's--no! Let go,
Reno!"

        "Hey,
we're training to be SOLDIERS, y'know." Zack grinned and moved closer,
dipping and then showing off his ketchup-drenched fingers like they were
weapons. "Gotta go with whatever you have on hand."

        "Besides,"
Reno threw in, "You're so fucking cute when you're scared, Cloud."

        "He's
not supposed to be
scared, asshole." Zack teased his friend--but
with serious intention behind it. Of course... when he actually looked
at his best friend...
Oh, fuck. "Cloud?" he tried, softly.
"Is this okay, Cloud?"

        The
blond was shaking. Just a little, but it was obvious. And he
knew it was obvious, which made him shake more and blush and wish he could
just crawl under the floor and die.

        "Hey..."
Zack's voice softened even past what his friend was used to. Calm
and gentle and... loving, in a way. He carefully lifted Cloud's head
with two cautious fingers beneath his chin until their eyes met.
"We'll stop now if you really don't want this. I'd never force you
into anything. Okay?"

        He
swallowed hard... still shaking, still blushing... but nodded. He
trusted Zack, and whoever Zack trusted. And, really... he wasn't
exactly opposed to little bits of safe experimentation. It had just
been... so surprising. Strange and new and exciting, but... yes,
a little scary. He knew his friend didn't intend to hurt him, but
he was still nervous. That, and he didn't know Reno well enough to
know exactly what his intentions were.

        "Here."
The redhead spoke up as if he'd sensed he was being thought of. He
released his hold on Cloud, uncoiling the controller cord from his wrists.
"Feel better now?"

        Not
really... but he sure as hell wasn't going to say so. "I...
uh..."

        "Great."
Reno interrupted, looking strangely... hungry. "You can thank me
by taking off your shirt. Whaddya say?"

        Cloud
already had chills running over his spine. The request, oddly enough,
made him feel... warmer. As did venturing a peripheral glance at
Zack--fingers still coated with ketchup and a very interested look on his
face. Well. He couldn't very well back out, could he...
Slowly, he reached for the hem of his moogle night shirt, not daring to
meet the redhead's admiring eyes as he pulled it over his head and let
it fall to the side.

        Reno
only nodded approval, not betraying his "exceptional cool" one bit.
His hands could be surprisingly delicate when he wanted them to be; they
tugged Cloud's pajama pants down and off of his hips with a distinct carefulness,
tugging as much as he could reach from his angle and with the boy still
kneeling in front of him--before Zack grabbed and pulled them the rest
of the way off with his free hand, Cloud helpfully stepping out of each
leg.

        The
blonde shivered with the sudden chill--not to mention the thrill of the
two fully-dressed boys watching with held breath. He was still nervous,
still blushing... but he was so ready to do more.

        "C'mere."
He heard the redhead whisper breathily--and he obeyed. Still kneeling,
Reno spread his legs to pull Cloud's body fully against his own, both of
them shivering at the feel of rough fabric against soft flesh.

        One
of Reno's hands went to the back of the blond's head, running through his
hair and finally grasping it lightly at the back. But the other hand
slid further, trailing down his tailbone, reaching between the soft, pale
globes... and holding them apart for the other boy.

        It
was enough to make Cloud moan quite loudly. Just so... and it...
and too... oh.

        "That's
what you call Turk efficiency." Zack quipped, breathing hard at the
sight.

        Reno
winked. "Y'ain't seen nothin' yet."

        That
was exactly what the wild-haired youth was hoping. He crawled forward,
taking his sweet time as he ran the lightest touch of his lips over his
best friend's shoulder. When that got a soft moan and some notable
trembling, he continued his assault with teeth and tongue until even Reno
had begun panting, watching closely as he continued to hold the boy on
display.

        And
glad Zack was for it. Just as he let his teeth nip a little harder
at the blonde's shoulder blade, he very carefully began to press a ketchup-smothered
finger against the entrance he sought. He heard the gasp, felt muscles
bunch underneath him--softly, he kissed the shell of Cloud's ear to calm
him. "Relax, Spike. I promise, it'll feel good in a minute."

        He
hadn't wanted to say it... wasn't even sure he'd wanted to think
it, but... it already felt good. Too good. Much better than
when he did it himself... yet another admission he was painfully unwilling
to share.

        But
Reno knew. The bastard knew everything. "Bet you prefer it
this way, eh Cloud?" he whispered in the boy's other ear. "Zack's
a fucking miracle worker with those fingers, ain't he?"

        Lightly
circling his single finger inside of the gasping blond, Zack gave a bright
grin. "You make me sound like a slut."

        "You
are a slut." Reno teased--his voice gravelly and still breathing
softly into Cloud's ear very much on purpose.

        Zack
definitely felt the muscles clench at that--but not in a negative
way. Certainly not after that elongated moan he'd torn free by finding
just the right spot inside...

        Oh,
there it was again. Cloud hadn't even known he was the one making
the noises until the mild pain of the second finger being worked into him
knocked him out of his complete revelry. He knew he was gasping,
couldn't help rocking into the boy on front of him--

        Reno's
moans were something else entirely. Cloud's were absolutely delicious,
no doubt, but Reno's... it was the voice of a filthy angel. "Dammit,
Cloud... mmm... oh, harder..."

        "You
aren't supposed to cum first." Zack teased, pressing that glorious
spot inside of the blond again. Having the two of them moan at once
was almost enough to get him to finish way too early. Not
that he wouldn't have been ready to go again in seconds if they kept making
those sounds.

        "One
more..." Cloud heard Zack's warning in his ear before a third finger started
to edge inside.
That had started to hurt--he'd never tried anything...
that big... but the lips and teeth and tongue returning to his shoulders
and neck made it a hell of a lot easier to take.

        Finally
satisfied that his friend was properly stretched, the fingers were very
slowly removed. Zack wasted absolutely no time pulling his own clothing
off, pressing his full naked body against Cloud's without warning.

        That
got some wonderful sounds out of the blond as his eyes fluttered shut,
leaning back and allowing Reno the freedom to be the last to strip.
"Watch." Cloud heard his friend order, finding it hard to obey--but
once his eyes were open, he understood.

        Maybe
it wasn't technically a strip tease... but Reno absolutely knew what he
was doing. Not an ounce of shame; he pulled both shirt and jacket
off at once, then spent some time exploring his own perfect, pale chest
with adept fingers. The button of his fly was next, zipper sliding
down far too slowly before he took himself in hand and moaned with a couple
of careful strokes. He met the eyes of his audience with a knowing
smirk before he finally rid himself of everything, collapsing gracefully
back into a kneel in front of his latest conquest.

        "Actually..."
Zack rasped, closing his eyes and doing everything in his power to control
himself. "Why don't we switch. I want to see his face when
he comes."

        Cloud
shivered and bit his lip so the moan wouldn't turn into a squeak.
The thought of... and... oh...

        The
other two shifted, changing places. First contact came when Reno's
hands rested on Cloud's hips with no hint of uncertainty--but he went no
further. He could wait if he had to.

        Zack
chuckled quietly at the blond's expression: mouth open, eyes closed, absolutely
wanton. "Are you ready, Cloud?"

        He
swallowed, somehow gaining the courage to open his eyes--met only with
a pleasant, understanding smile in the eyes of his best friend. "Yes."
Pure honesty.

        Reno
didn't wait. It wasn't that he was rough, simply unyielding; he positioned
himself against Cloud's entrance. It was a tease while he waited
for Zack to pass him the plate of fries, the concept finally making him
laugh even as he smoothed ketchup all over his length. "Man.
I hope all SOLDIERS are this creative."

        Zack
grinned before taking a moment to distract the blond... and himself.
He hadn't planned for that deep, breath-stealing kiss--but damn was he
glad to indulge. He was even surprised (and gratefully so) when Cloud
returned the kiss only seconds later. It distracted them both right
up until the loud gasp that erupted when the head of Reno's erection managed
to push just inside.

        "Easy,
Spike..." Zack whispered against the other boy's lips, not willing to let
go so soon. "Just relax." He continued the kiss as if it had
never been interrupted, making it impossibly more distracting by
lightly letting his tongue play over Cloud's lips... then pressing between
them, seeking entrance into the mouth he'd been dreaming about for too
long.

        Taking
advantage of the sudden kiss-caused limpness in nearly the blond's entire
body, Reno rocked forward slowly but unrelenting. He was as careful
as his libido let him be, but refused to stop until he was entirely settled
within the tight heat. It would be murder, he knew that... but he
had to stay still and let the kid adjust. "'Kay... Zack..."

        He
took his cue, almost not hearing the redhead over the rush of his own blood
as he ravaged those incredibly soft lips... He almost hated to end
the kiss. But then... there was a good reason to do so. He
took a moment to catch his breath before asking, "Y'ever done this before?"

        "N-no..."
Cloud answered, voice rough with anticipation. Even the nervousness
was bleeding away, arousal taking over entirely. Any pain that Reno
may have caused was forgotten as soon as it had registered. Slowly,
he let himself be positioned on his hands and knees--coming face to face
with Zack's rather obvious need. He didn't even wait to be told what
to do, immediately running a tongue from root to tip--then back.

        The
unexpected pleasure almost made his legs collapse beneath him entirely.
The sounds he made in that moment of surprise and bliss rivaled the other
two, making them both shiver. "Oh, Holy... Cloud..."

        The
blond allowed a quick, satisfied smile before attacking in full.
His lips parted, teeth cautiously keeping their distance as he wrapped
his mouth around Zack and delicately tasted him. Well, alright, it
wasn't... terribly pleasant, per se... but he didn't really care.
It felt good to make him moan like that, and it felt good
to have his friend's fingers thread through his hair, not to control but
to find a place to hang on for the ride.

        It
was all Reno could take, frankly. He pulled back in a slow arc, having
at least the presence of mind to look around for Cloud's sweet spot before
cautiously pushing back in. He didn't want Zack to experience teeth,
of course... but he just couldn't wait any longer.

        Lucky
for Zack, Cloud understood. Even with the odd, tingling pleasure-pain,
he was able to control himself, using his tongue to stroke hard as he sucked.
The sounds his friend emitted only made him bolder, reaching one hand up
to slowly explore a leg, then a thigh.

        "Oh,
fuck..." Zack nearly whimpered. He'd expected the blond to be a lot
more timid. Not that he could find any portion of himself complaining.

        Reno
had similar thoughts... or would have, if he'd been capable of thought
at all at that point. Even through the slow motions, not yet having
been quite able to ignore his own needs long enough to get to Cloud's,
it was... so good... "Mmm... oooohh... you should... get a piece
of this, Zack..."

        He
smiled at Reno appreciatively. "Hey, I'm happy here. Cloud
looks happy here." He chuckled through a sharp hiss as his best friend
moaned hard around his length--seemed Reno had found the proper spot after
all. "You give better handjobs, anyway."

        The
boy between them would have loved to demand proof of that by having them
compete... but his mouth was a little full. That, and Reno's hand
had snaked around to prove it.

        Time
was lost. Cloud was lost, as well--but pleasantly so. He was
learning technique he'd only read about, trying things he never thought
he'd dare and getting noises out of his friend that he was relatively certain
most of his female partners never would have managed. Maybe it was
a matter of pride... or maybe it was the occasional mumble on Zack's part
that seemed to be part of a mental conversation with himself about how
he should quit the women entirely. Reno said not a word, but kept
making those incredible sounds as he slowly built speed, stroking
the boy beneath him in time. The first orgasm for the night was,
for all of them, transcendent. Not that the second or third were
anything to scoff at.

        Sephiroth
had been walking the halls in quite a mood early on Sunday morning.
It was the weekend, so naturally nobody was there.

        Nobody
but him. Having to deal with stupid, mundane things like phone
calls regarding noises. No one that he had called about the
matter had responded. So it was up to him. Clearly. Someone
would die on Monday morning.

        He
used his key card on the door mentioned in each and every complaint.
Within seconds his security override took effect and it opened--

        It
wasn't the three unconscious, naked boys sprawled on the floor that bothered
him in the least. Or the fact there was a gaming system, against regulation,
hidden in the room. It was the mess they'd left in their wake.

        Ketchup.
Everywhere.

        As
if I weren't going to Hell before I wrote this... Wow.
I never thought I was capable of something like this. And I bet you
didn't either.
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