Mystery Science Torture 3000 #101

(Satellite of Torture. Dino is sitting on a bench looking out one of the windows muttering to himself. Metallic banging noises are echoing all around the room.)
Dino: Why me? I never even heard of the Department of Madness!
Ana: EUREKA! It's finished!

(Dino turns away from the window and looks over to Jase and Ana. Both covered with oil and flakes of metal. Jase stands wiping off the spare flakes from his hair and clothes. Dino walks over to them looking at the mass pile of metal rods and beams.)
Dino: ...What is it?
Ana: *stands from her pile of metal, taking a fashionable victory pose with wrench in hand* It's a robot of course.

(Dino looks down at the pile of metal obviously not seeing what Ana is talking about.)
Dino: It looks like a pile of metal
Jase: Well it's a robot!
Dino: How do you know?
Ana: Because I told him *whacks Dino across the back of the head with the wrench*

(Dino falls to the floor grabbing the back of his head. Jase continues wiping off the flakes and bits of metal watching Dino writhe about on the floor.)
Jase: I argued the same thing...same result.
Dino: DEAR GOD MY HEAD!
Ana: see the design now?

(Commercial sign flashes)
Jase: We'll fix Dino's head and be back in a minute *taps it*

==============================
(Commercials. Shameless plug for SpiderMan 3. An advertisement for AFF.net.)
==============================

(SoT. Dino sits with a bag of ice on the back of his head. Ana's still tinkering with pile of metal and Jase has moved behind the counter.)
Dino: I still don't see it....or normally out of my left eye now
Jase: Me either
Ana: *threatens both with wrench again before returning to her pile* You'll see! I'll show you both!

(MADs light flashes)
Dino: Theeeyyyy'rrree baaackkk

(Depart of Madness. Dr. Madston sits behind a desk looking at the monitor.)
DrM: Hello kiddies. How's everyone doing today? I've got a fic for you.

(SoT. Ana continues tinkering ignoring the monitor.)
Dino: Yey..
Jase: Terrrific...

(DoM)
DrM: Do you have an invention this week?

(SoT)
Ana: *springs form her pile of rubble* Yea! I've got my robot!
Dino and Jase: *move to cower behind the counter*
Ana: Let me finish this last tweak.
(Ana wrenches a last bolt in place, and the pile of rubble begins shaking and crumbling. Dino and Jase duck down further behind the counter. The pile of metal stands in a towering form of a crudely built robot, before it starts to smoke, spark and shake violently before it crumbles apart into the pile of metallic pieces. Ana crumples to her knees, sulking as her robot dies.)
Ana: Nooooo!!
Dino and JAse: whew...

(DoM. Dr. Madston is now laughing loudly at the failed experiment. Rose comes in from the side of the screen.)
DrM: Whew...that was good and funny...

(SoT)
Ana: Yea! Well let's see what you got!

(DoM)
Rose: Shall I doctor?
DrM: Indeed, sweetums. I've got this!
Rose: *pushes button*


***Lights and Klaxons Sound***

(Door 7-A Dog Bone, of course)
(Door 6-It's Doug Herzog. You kick him in the groin, laugh at his pain,
and leave.)
(Door 5-It's an ad for Scream 3. Depending on your preference, you
either tear it to shreds or bow down and worship it, then move on)
(Door 4-You walk into a chat room right in the middle of a huge,
incomprehensible roleplay. Confused, you walk out, shaking your head)
(Door 3-An ad for the Author Avatar Association. You note the shameless
plug and move on)
(Door 2-A solid wall of ice. You grab a flamethrower and melt an
entrance)
(Door 1-Death stands before you. He points beyond him, and you hurry
by.)
(Door .69-A black hole opens in the fabric of reality, sucking you into
the theater)

(They enter Dino, Jase, Ana)

Dino: I really hate my life
Jase: That makes two of us
Dino: Shaddap
Ana: I almost had my robot! Poopie
(They sit in that order)
Final Fantasy VII

Dino: (apathetic) Yay, another one
Ana: I don’t see the big deal about Final Fantasy 7…what’s so great about it?
Jase: Silicon enhanced character with a short skirt *drooling*
Dino: Sadly enough…he summed up the lemon appeal
Ana: Riiiight..

>When Life Gives You Lemons

Ana: You make lemonade?
Jase: No you write fanfics. . .
Dino: .. and make other people’s lives have lemonade

>Tifa lay awake in her bed at the Golden Saucer's inn, she could think
>of nothing but

Dino: That new bra coming out in the summer?
Jase: not being in a lemon?
Ana: Are they really that bad?
Dino and Jase: *look at each other* Yea, they are

>Sephiroth and what he had done. He had destroyed
>everything, her home, her chance at a normal life, her childhood
>friend's mind...

Jase: ... but it was all for a good cause!
Ana: Plus he’s Sephy, he can do it and get away with it, because he’s hawt!
Dino: Here comes the Sephiroth worshipping

>everything. "I hate you Sephiroth." she whispered to
>herself,

Dino: I bet he doesn’t like you much either
Jase: She’s silicon enhanced! How can he not?!
Ana: No one cares for Sephy’s feelings, it’s very sad

>knowing full well that it wouldn't do a thing.

>Suddenly, Tifa's thoughts were interrupted by a creak in the hallway.

ALL: *make creaking sounds*

>Someone was out there!

Ana: Boy, she’s a quick one isn’t she?
Dino: Oh yea, that’s the reason she’s in sooo many lemons

>Climbing out of the bed in her nightgown,

Dino: Well, there goes my thoughts
Jase: Huh?
Dino: She doesn’t sleep nude…
Ana: *sigh*

>Tifa crept to the door and opened it a crack
>to look out into the dark hallway.

Ana: So she has night vision too?
Dino: No
Ana: Then why is she looking in the dark to see nothing?

>At first, seeing in the obscurity was difficult but once
>Tifa's eyes got used to the light

Ana: Oh, question answered

>she saw quite clearly that Aeris,
>fully dressed,

Jase: As opposed to being fully nude and walking around
Dino: Give it time

>was knocking on Cloud's door.

Ana: (Aeris) Cloud? Are you in there?
Jase: (Cloud) Lemme alone! I’m brooding over how I’m a puppet to Sephiroth!
Dino: (Aeris) Poopie! I wanted to get laid too!
Jase: (Cloud) Too bad!

>After a moment, Cloud opened the door and allowed her to enter, the door was then closed
>again with a quiet click.

Ana: If a click is quiet does it make a sound?
Dino: It’s too early for paradoxes Ana
Ana: Right, sorry

>Tifa, unable to contain her

Jase: Breasts?

>curiosity,

Jase: *disappointed* oh

>rushed quickly to her room's opposite wall and pressed her ear to it,
>hoping to catch something of the conversation.


Ana: What if they were just talking about the new line of material coming out?
Jase: Or maybe they were just having tea?
Dino: Both are wrong, I would guess. She’s prolly making fun of Cloud for dressing like a woman

>"Aeris, I'm tired."

Jase: (Cloud) I’ve been thinking too much, I’m exhausted


>What came next was too soft to hear.

>"We can't, we've got to get an early start tomorrow"

>Aeris's voice, slightly whiny, it sounded like she was asking why.

Ana: (Aeris) Please Cloud? Just for a little bit?
Dino: (Cloud) No, we can play Uno tomorrow

>"Because Sephiroth isn't going to wait around while we have fun."

Ana: Yea, he wants to have fun too! It’s not all about you!
Jase: Is it just me or is she going bananas defending Sephiroth?
Dino: Yup
Ana: You two shaddap!

>Aeris' voice, calmer.

>"Yes, I promise, after we defeat Sephiroth."


>Tifa heard Cloud's door open and shut again and Aeris' footsteps
>proceeding along the hall. Inconceivably, the sounds of Aeris' feet
>stopped by Tifa's door.

Jase: How do you think she figured that out?
Dino: I dunno, prolly didn’t hear the creak again.
Ana: Wooo…she’s so quick.

>Had she known Tifa was listening?

Dino: The bigger question is...
Jase: ... did she care?
Ana: Does that make Tifa a voyeur?

>Tifa jumped quickly back into bed and pulled her blankets up to her neck, she
>turned her back to the door and feigned sleep.

Ana: (Tifa) Quick! She won’t come in if I’m asleep!
Dino: (Tifa) The ultimate disguise!
Jase: She could’ve feigned something else ...
Ana: O_o
Dino: Don’t ask

>Slowly, quietly, she heard her door open and Aeris step into the room.
>Tifa's heart raced,

Jase: (Announcer 1) And they’re off out of the gate
Dino: (Announcer 2) Tifa’s heart takes the lead followed closely by ...
Ana: Aeris’ racing libido..?

>what was going to happen? Aeris walked into Tifa's
>room, quietly shutting the door behind her, and seated herself on
>Tifa's bed.

Jase: Wow
Ana: Wha?
Jase: No, really Aeris, by all means make yourself at home while someone’s sleeping

>Aeris leaned down and whispered in Tifa's ear.

Dino: (Aeris) If you build it, they will come
Jase: Wow, that came out of left field
Dino: I know
Ana: I don’t get it

>"Tifa... wake up Tifa..."

Ana: I want to be in a lemon scene with you
Dino: Have you ever seen a lemon scene?
Ana: Yes! Once...
Jase: Hoo-boy.. it starts

>if Tifa hadn't been so afraid of being discovered,
>she would have sighed with relief,

Jase: As opposed to sighing of despair?
Ana: Or frustration, Aeris seems pretty dense so far

>but instead she feigned sleep for a little while longer
>and then allowed herself to slowly come "awake"

Dino: Well good thing she didn’t let herself come asleep, that’d be just awkward
Ana: Can one come asleep?
Jase: I doubt it, but someone’ll be coming before the end of this scene

>as if Aeris' voice had brought her out of her dreams.

Dino: (TifA) Poopie, it was such a good dream about breast enlargement too
Jase: (Tifa) Yes, all you can have silicon for $100
Ana: I’d think of breast deflating if I were her

>"Hmmm? Aeris? What is it? What's wrong?"

>"It's Cloud."

Dino: (Aeris) He's doing it again
Ana: (Tifa) thinking?
Jase: psh, I don't think he can

>"What about Cloud?"

Jase: (Aeris) that spike on his head really creeps me out
Dino: (Tifa) don’t worry, it’s just Cloud compensating
Ana: (Aeris) oh good, I thought his brain was located there
Jase: (Tifa) don’t be silly, Aeris... Cloud doesn’t have a brain

>"I offered to take him on his date tonight but he said we didn't have
>time."

Jase: He had a date Barret already
Dino: Or he was searching for Sephiroth, I think he was more infatuated with him than anyone else
Ana: As well as he should be!
Dino and Jase: *slap foreheads*

>"Oh Cloud's always serious, don't worry Aeris, he'll live up to his
>promise."

>Aeris sighed, "Thanks Tifa," she said, "it's not really him, I just
>wanted to be with _someone_ tonight. Anyone."

Ana: (Aeris) I just figured I’d try you before I went to Barret
Dino: (Aeris) Or Cait Sith, I’m not sure how we would’ve got it on
Jase: *turns a bit green* Toy sex...

>Tifa surprised herself by lifting up a corner of her blankets and
>offering them to Aeris.

Ana: (Tifa) Why’d I do that?
Dino: (Tifa) Right, because I want the bed instead of the floor

>Aeris looked about twice as surprised as Tifa
>felt,

Jase: Which when you carry the six equals fourteen
Dino: What?
Ana: He’s having math class flashbacks
Dino: Oh

>"Really?" she asked, "are you sure it's ok?"

>Tifa nodded, "Sure," she said, "you can stay here with me for
>company."

Jase: (Tifa)Plus I was only secretly waiting for you to leave Cloud’s room so I could bother him
Dino: (Aeris) Oh, that explains your nightgown, I never would’ve pegged you for a pink one

>Aeris smiled beautifully, her green eyes lighting up as she slipped
>off her boots

ALL: *makes thudding sounds*

>and slid under the covers with Tifa.

Dino: (Aeris) Gimmeh some more bitch!
Ana: (Tifa) Ha! Not on your life!
Jase: (Aeris) Don’t make me get the boots!

>"Thank you Tifa," she sighed happily, "this makes me feel alot better"

>Once Aeris was in the bed, Tifa felt her snuggle up to her back, and
>sigh, so much like a child.

Jase: *turns another shade of green*
Dino: You ok amigo?
Ana: *gags a bit*
Jase: Suddenly I had a pedophilia scene from the Sailor Moon fic, remember?
Dino: *turns green*

>At the same time, Tifa was beginning to feel a bit differently about
>Aeris,

Ana: so differently infact, she realized she was abigger threat then first thought and turned over to choke her, killing her there and then. The End.
Jase and Dino: O_o
Ana: What?
Dino and JAse: Nothing

>she turned her neck and looked at Aeris' peaceful face.

Dino: Isn’t that uncomfortable?
Ana: Look at those boulders she carries on her chest, there’s not much worse then that…
Jase: *makes cracking noises*


>It was the first time Tifa had noticed it,

Dino: The growth on Aeris face?
Jase: The upper lip hair?
Ana: The blood leaking out of her eyes from a slow painful death?
Dino and Jase: *scoot away a bit*
Ana: WHAT?!

>Aeris was a beautiful woman, much more refined, soft and smooth than Tifa was. Tifa turned over >to get a better look at her.

Dino: (Tifa) Aw man, she’s got that teenie bopper look going for her
Ana: (Tifa) is that a wart?


>"She's sure a lot more then I am" Tifa thought to
>herself

ALL: O_o
Dino: A lot more what?
Ana: cuter?
Dino: smarter?
Jase: nymphonic?
Ana and Dino: O_o
Jase: SHE GETS TO BE DARK AND I CAN’T LOOK AT THE NAUGHTIER SIDE?!

>and reached over to touch Aeris' face, as she lightly caressed
>Aeris' cheek with the ends of her fingers, those bright clear eyes
>opened and met Tifa's.

Dino: (Aeris’ eyes) Hi, nice to meet you
Jase: (Tifa’s eyes) The pleasure’s all mine
Ana: not yet it isn’t

>They looked at each other for a moment, silence
>between them.

ALL: *make cricket noises*

>Then, almost as if it were in a dream,

Jase: They both spontaneously exploded?
Dino: I would’ve expected that from Ana
Ana: (brooding) Sadly, I was going to say that..

>Aeris reached out to Tifa and held her

Ana: Throat until she choked her to death?

>shoulders,

Ana: poopie

>pulling herself closer and pressing her body fully against Tifa's. Then, in almost as dream-
>like a fashion, Aeris leaned her face towards Tifa's and kissed her gently on
>the lips.

Dino: Well, that came out of nowhere
Ana: I don’t have dreams like this..
Jase: I do, but there’d be tentacles in it...
Dino: ... you’re sick
Jase: What?!

>For a long moment, they stayed like that, eyes closed, lips pressed
>together,

Ana: Well, that’s not too bad

>until Tifa, wanting it to go farther, slipped her tongue
>between thier mouths and ran it over Aeris' teeth.

Ana: Is she brushing Aeris’ teeth with her tongue?
Dino: I’d say so
Jase: Maybe she’s picking out the dinner from earlier?


>In response, Aeris'
>mouth opened and allowed Tifa's probing tongue to enter her mouth.

Dino: (Tifa’s tongue) Helloooo anyone home? Probe probe
Ana: (Aeris’ mouth) No go home!


>As their tounges

Ana: What’s a tounge?
Dino: I’m not sure
Jase: The forgotten part of the mouth that likes to pop in place of the tongue every now and then?

>touched and intertwined,

Ana: Tongue tied much?

>Tifa began to undo Aeris' red topcoat, finally opening it and breaking the kiss for a moment to >slip it off.

Dino: Welp, the lemon scene gets underway
Jase: Ladies and Gentlemen LEEEETTT’SSS GGEETT RREEAADDYY TOOO LEEEMMMOOONNN!
Ana: My ears! *covers ears*

>Tifa and Aeris began to undress each other slowly taking
>thier time to enjoy the sensations of what they were doing.

Dino: (Tifa) duh duh duh never undressed a girl before
Jase: (Aeris) must make it last, will die soon
Ana: What sensation do you get by..nevermind I just answered my own question

>Tifa reached behind Aeris and unzipped her dress, pulling it down off her body,

Jase: (Tifa) HAHA! I pantsed you!
Ana: (Aeris) OH! You big bully!

>leaving her clad only in a pair of white panties. At the same
>time, Aeris pulled Tifa's nightgown up and over her head.

Dino: Wait, so Tifa was going pulling down a dress at the sametime her nightgown was coming off over her head?
Ana: Ahuh
Dino: I think there’s a physical impossibility there?
Jase: Dino. Lemon. Remember?
Dino: right

>Tifa, naked at last,

Jase: FREEDOM FROM CLOTHES!
Dino: They make it sound like it took a lot of work
Ana: Well, holding your arms up is if you have boobs that big

>reached down and pulled Aeris' panties down and off her, tossing them aside and then reaching
>out

ALL: *singing* REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!

>and pulling Aeris' nude form to her. Aeris moaned slightly as she felt the slight dampness of >Tifa's pussy press up against her own.

Ana: Now, I don’t care what it is... -that’s- impossible!
Dino: Eh?
Ana: How are they touching to feel that while standing?
Jase: Maybe they’re gushers?
Ana: *turns green* Nevermind I asked

>Tifa then leaned down and took one of Aeris' nipples in her mouth,

Jase: (Tifa) Breast feeding time!
Dino: (Aeris) Eat up sweetie it’ll make you big and strong
Ana: If she gets any bigger they might explode

>gently licking in circles around it. Aeris threw her head back and moaned at the pleasure.

Dino: Hope she didn’t throw it too far
Ana: (Aeris) Mooooooooannnn
Jase: (pleasure) oh rub it in why don’t you

>As Tifa suckled her, Aeris was working her hand down under the covers and
>towards the wetness between Tifa's legs.

Jase: (Aeris) Aww, someone’s all wet time for a dipey change

>Tifa continued suckling Aeris' breast, she woudn't get tired of this
>anytime soon

Ana: I’d bet, she’s not having hers sucked... it hurts after a while you know
Dino: O_o No I would have no idea really

>and Aeris herself seemed to be enjoying it as well. Then,
>suddenly,

Ana: Tifa’s head exploded and Aeris ran screaming out of the room never to mention about what happened that night. The End.
Jase: She’s starting to creep me out a bit
Dino: Ditto

>she felt Aeris' beautiful slender hand lightly touch her
>damp pussy.

Jase: Doesn’t she know it’s winter? That cat could freeze!
Ana: (Aeris) Tifa why is your cat wet?
Dino: (Tifa) Mittens! What are you doing in here? This is a lemon scene mommy will feed you later

>Tifa stopped sucking Aeris' breast and moaned. Aeris was
>lightly passing her hand back and forth over Tifa's pussy, lightly
>caressing her swollen lips but never entering.

Dino: (Aeris) I’m not entering you! I’m not entering you! Haha!
Jase: (Tifa) Cloud! Aeris won’t enter me!
Ana: …a word? Ew

>Then, just as Tifa felt she would have to force Aeris to touch her she felt 2 fingers plunge
>into her

ALL: *makes splashing noises*

>and a thumb on her clit. Aeris slowly pumped her fingers in and out of Tifa's pussy,

Dino: That poor cat...
Jase: ...So violated

>lubricating her thumb which, every so often, she would use to rub Tifa's clit and end jolts of >pleasure throughout her body.


Dino: So Tifa’s getting no pleasure from this?
Jase: Yup Aeris’ keeps ending it

>Tifa moaned, "Ohh, yes Aeris, don't stop."

>Aeris continued pumping and rubbing until a short sharp orgasm rocked
>Tifa's entire body.

ALL: (singing as orgasm) ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANE!


>Tifa sighed as the pleasure overcame her and remarked to herself that for once, she was at
>peace.

Dino: (Tifa) Wow, I’m so at peace


>Her demons couldn't harm her while she made love to Aeris. She closed her eyes for a moment,
>breathing deeply. When she opened them again, she found Aeris looking at her expectantly.

Jase: So wait..Aeris is looking at Tifa pregnant?
Dino: Not expcting, expectantly
Jase: oh

>"How was it?" came the girl's voice, only a whisper.


>Tifa drew Aeris' body to her, marvelling again at how soft she was

Jase: (Tifa) duh duh duh so soft
Ana: It’s called moisturizer! USE IT!


>and caressed her back and arms reassuringly.


Dino: (Tifa) IT’s ok, the scenes almost over.
Jase: (Tifa) Not much longer now

>"Oh Aeris, it was the best."

>Aeris sighed and snuggled happily up to Tifa's chest. Tifa smiled
>indulgently and carefully fed the girl one of her breasts.

JasE: (Tifa) Here you go baby, feeding tim-
Dino: *clamps a hand over JAse’s mouth* Riffs been used
Jase: poopie

>As Aeris' warm mouth and tongue gently pleasured her nipple, Tifa reached down and starting
>stroking the other girl's thighs.

Dino: (Tifa) Wow, have you been doing your thighmaster exercises, Aeris?
Ana: (Aeris) Mhmm! Twice a day

>Aeris didn't need any more encouragement, and parted her legs submissively; she shuddered in
>ecstasy as Tifa's fingers explored her.

Dino: (Tifa’s fingers) Man, I really love spelunking
Ana: (same) Heloo! Echo….echo….echo……echoo

>Aeris moaned into Tifa's breast and tried not to lose herself

Dino: (Aeris) Must not lose self... have no map..
Ana: Too bad, if she did it’d be over

>to the intense pleasure she was experiencing. Tifa's fingers were plunging in and out of her
>now soaking pussy

Jase: Why is Tifa violating Aeris cat?!
Dino: I dunno
Ana: Fair is Fair, she violated Tifa’s cat


>and expertly stroking her clit,

Ana: So she’s done this before?
Dino: Wouldn’t surprise me
Jase: Me either

>keeping her on the edge of orgasm, but not yet allowing her to give
>herself completely over to the new sensations.

Dino: (Tifa)HAHA! No new sensations for you!
Jase: (Aeris) WAAAAHHHH!!!

>Tifa slowed her ministrations, and gently pulled her breast from Aeris
>mouth. Aeris looked longingly up at Tifa, her eyes questioning.

>"Why did you stop? I'm so close, I-"

>Tifa silenced her by bringing her wet fingers up to Aeris mouth.

Ana: *makes a face* Sick.. that’s just sick..
Dino: I dunno that’s kind of hot
Jase: I agree
Ana: You two would

>Aeris parted her lips and sucked Tifa's fingers, cleaning her juices off them with her lips and
>tongue.

Dino: Obviously Aeris agrees too
Ana: Yea she’s not any better at this point

>Tifa grinned mischeviously and got up off the bed and walked to the
>foot of it. Her eyes never left Aeris' as she shifted positions,
>opened her legs, and began to gently rub her own clit.

Ana: (Tifa) Haha! No more for you! It’s allll for me!
Dino: (Aeris) poopie!


>"Ohhhh, mmmmm" she moaned, licking her lips as she touched herself,
>getting even more turned on by the other girl watching her.

Ana: That’s what I needed!
Dino and Jase: eh?
Ana: An on/off switch for my robot
Dino and Jase: *slaps forehead*

>Aeirs

Dino: who?
Ana: there’s a third person?
Jase: Obviously

>meanwhile had come to sit at the foot of the bed so she could
>watch Tifa more closely. Tifa's glistening lips invited a mouth,

Ana: (Lips) Hey mouth. Wanna come over?
Jase: (Mouth) of course!
Dino: Haha, such a clever innuendo you two

>and Aeris found herself

Dino: So out of character she abruptly killed herself rather then be in this lemon anymore?
Ana: So we’re all the dark ones?
Jase: Exactly

>leaning in to kiss Tifa's wetness, but was stopped short by Tifa's hand.

ALL: *singing* Stop in the name of love


>"No, let me" Tifa grasped both of Aeris' knees and firmly spread her
>legs wide.

Jase: Accidentally ripping her in half. The End.
Dino: It’s sounds much weirder coming from Ana
Ana: It’s because I’m the innocent one

>Aeris blushed, and looked away. Tifa knelt down and began
>to kiss slowly down Aeris' leg towards the apex of her thighs.

Jase: AHHH!! GEOMETRY! *begins rocking back and forth sucking thumb*
Ana: Poor guy
Dino: *twitching* I hated Geometry

>Aeris moaned encouragingly. Tifa paused a moment to admire Aeris' pussy

Dino: (Tifa) What’s his name?
Ana: (Aeris) Boots
Jase: *still sucking thumb*

>before finally kissing it.

Dino: (Tifa) Such a sweet Bootsy
Ana: (Ana) ahem as you were doing?
JAse: (Tifa) oh right, back to the lemon

>Aeris writhed around on the bed as Tifa licked her,

JasE: (Aeris) COOTIES!
Dino: Little late for that one
Jase: Yea, I know

>plunging her soft tongue into Aeris' wet pussy

Dino: Poor Boots
Ana: First fingers, now a tongue
JasE: HAVE THEY NO SHAME!

>and occaisionally licking her clit. As Aeris approached orgasm,

Ana: Is that the new attraction at the Golden Saucer?

>she placed her hands on the back of Tifa's head and pressed her face harder against her.

Ana: Suffocating her and killing her within her own juices. Sick way to die. The End
Jase: *half drooling* but what a way to go, eh?!

>Tifa responded by gently sucking on Aeris' small pink clit. This was all Aeris needed to push
>her over the edge.

ALL: WEEEEEEEEEEEEE *makes splatting sounds*

>Aeris moaned loudly as the tide of orgasm hit her


ALL: *makes slapping sound*

>and she settled down on the bed as her muscles relaxed.


>Tifa crawled back into the bed, and Aeris got in after her, they
>reached for each other, and held each other closely.

Jase: Is it over?
Dino: Yup
Ana: Thank god!
Jase: Poopie


>"Tif?" Aeris whispered.

>"Hmm?"

>"I... how does a date on the gondola sound?"

>"Aeris, I would love to."

>THE END

Dino: Another bites the dust!
Ana: THANK GOD!
Jase: Poopie!
*All exits*


(Back on the Satellite of Torture. Dino and Jase are arguing, as usual.)
Jase: It's all because Cloud doesn't pay either one of them attention! I'm telling you!
Dino: Yea, so you're saying Cloud's secretly in love with Sephiroth and is pretty much telling tifa and Aeris to get screwed?
Jase: Exactly! Why else would they get off on each other?
Dino: ...Because the author is more into a Aeris and Tifa fic, then anything else?

(Ana enters stage left, carrying her wrench. The pile of metal is gone now and Ana is covered with grim and oil.)

Ana: You two are -still- arguing about this?
Dino and Jase: Of course..
Ana: you could've help me get rid of Donnie
Dino: Donnie?
Jase: The robot...
Dino: You named the robot?!

(Ana again strikes Dino in the back of the head. Dino crumples to the floor grabbing his head.))
Dino: STOP DOING THAT!
Jase: ...
Ana: Anyway, of course Cloud is in love with Sephiroth...you ever counted how many Yaoi Cloud/Sephy fics are out there?
Jase: Countless

(MADs light flashes)

(DoM)
DrM: Well well kiddies still alive? Good! Because next week's fic is going to be worse!

(SoT)
Ana: Not a Yaoi Cloud/ Seph fic is it?
Jase: don't give him any ideas

(DoM)
DrM: No much much worse! You'll see! Till enxt week kiddies!
Rose: *pushes button*

(FWOOSH)