Inner Isolation

Inner Isolation

Chapter one

“Damn it” The blonde pilot cursed loudly as his hands shook uncontrollably. Anger seeped out from his very being as he looked down, glaring at the ruined model. Cid had been working on this model for Vincent. He had spent weeks on it and now it lay in pieces at his feet. Cursing again and putting a sailor to shame, he turned to stare at his hands or in his opinion his handicap.

“Cid?” The aviator jumped having not heard his lover walk in and couldn’t bring himself to answer just yet.

“Cid? Are you alright? I heard you yelling.” By now Cid had carefully reigned in almost all of his emotions.

“I’m fine Vin.” He snapped and Vincent sighed.

“What’s wrong?” Vincent already had an idea of what was bothering the blonde. It felt like the anger was radiating from his lover.

“Fuck. It’s nothing’ Vince. I fuckin’ jus broke something’ I’ve been working on for weeks. God damn my hands.” The pilot slammed his hands down on the work bench in total frustration.

“It’s not your fault.” Long ebony locks fell into Vincent’s face as he bent down to pick up the mess. Noticing the details on the model, he finally understood who it was for. Tiny silver Cerberus charms were placed on each wing of the black and red plane. Cid remained with his back toward Vincent as the gunman stood cradling the broken pieces in his arms. Gently he place them onto the work bench and turned to his lover. Seeing as Cid was upset he slipped his arms around the blonde’s waist, smiling to himself. It had taken many months of Vincent shoving food down the aviator to return him to his normal size.

“Lets fix it together. I love it by the way.” Cid turned around in the arms that now held him and buried his face into dark hair.

“I’m sorry for being so weak.” His apology was whispered so softly that Vincent almost didn’t hear.

“Look at me Cid.” He demanded as he pushed Cid to arms length. Azure eyes did their best to dodge but the gunner held firm until they finally settled on the crimson orbs in front of him. Vincent cupped his hands around the shorter man’s face.

“Now you listen to me Cid Highwind. I do not want to hear you say those words again. You are by no means weak.” But he knew Cid wasn’t listening. The pilot was trying his best to wriggle out of his grasp. Vincent inwardly sighed. The scars on Cid face and body were as fresh to his lover as the day they were made.

“Cid! Stop this now.” His voice was sharp but kind as the blonde looked up at the gunman. Vincent smiled now that he had Cid’s attention. Never letting go Vincent spoke carefully.

“You are beautiful in every single way. There is nothing wrong with you.” Finally Cid leaned into the taller man almost to the point of collapsing.

“I don’t deserve you. I can’t understand why you stay with me.” Vincent found his statement odd.

“I love who I love and that’s you. Now lets go back to the house and I’ll make some dinner.” Cid released his love and retrieved his cane. Walking side by side the two lovers made their way to the house. Vincent had moved a week after the day of the fire. It wasn’t good for Cid to stay in that house, or that was his thought. In all actuality he wasn’t sure what was right for the pilot. He felt as if he was flailing around in the dark searching for a way to help Cid. It literally crushed Vincent to see his lover so sad and what alarmed him even more was, that Cid was beginning to distance himself. There had been many days that Cid disappeared for hours and of course the gunner had desperately wanted to go in search of his love… but. The gunman feared that it might do more damage than good. Maybe it was good for him to be alone for awhile. If only he knew what to do. Vincent was so engrossed with his own that he did not hear Cid speak or even noticed they had made it inside the house.

“ Vin?” Azure were gazing at him in mild concern.

“I’m sorry Cid what were you saying?” Just only realizing that the blonde was still standing by the door.

“I’m goin’ out for awhile.” Vincent looked away.

“Oh. Where are you going?” Cid began to look uncomfortable.

“Jus for a walk. I’ll be back soon.” As Cid walked out the door Vincent felt a wave of fear washed over him and almost called out to his lover but he knew Cid could take care of himself. Even after everything that happened the blonde was still a very formidable foe. Making his way to the couch Vincent plopped down and stretch out. Maybe he would just take a nap while he waited on the aviator. He hadn’t been getting much sleep. Cid had very vivid nightmares and they woke Vincent many times during the night. They had been very bad in the beginning and for a time they were almost non-existent. Recently though Cid had begun to have them frequently and it was worrying the gunner. After awhile his thoughts lulled him into a restless sleep. Finally his phone waking him to half consciousness.

“’Ello.” He said sleepily.

“Vincent. Hey how are you doing?” The gunman could hear something else in his voice and replied quickly.

“Cloud?” Vincent’s voice was now dangerously serious.

“Do you know where Cid is?” Fear began to seep up through him.

“He is out for a walk. Why?” He could hear Cloud trying to fin the right words.

“Just tell me Cloud.”

“Well Shera has escaped from jail merely hours ago. Now Vincent I don’t want you to be angry and I can’t stress that enough but it looks like Cid was the one that helped her.” The gunman’s phone exploded from the force of his grasp and a few seconds later his cell rang. Opening and putting it up to his ear he could already hear Cloud.

“Now please don’t break this phone too, you don’t have anymore.” It took every fiber of his being to remain calmed enough to talk with the swordsman.

“How and why would he do that.” Cloud hesitated a few seconds.

“Well it seems that Cid has been a regular visitor for the last three months. I’ve seen the videos of it myself and even I can’t deny that it looks like Cid passed her something under the table.” Vincent stood up and walked to the window catching sight of the blonde walking up the road. Cloud could sense a change in the gunman.

“Vincent what’s wrong?”

“I’m about to get into a fight.” Vincent barley heard Cloud screaming to not fight with Cid but he had thrown the phone onto the floor and in reality he did not care. This was one thing he would not stand for and he was going to make sure Cid understood that.

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A/N: Thanks to Shiki for the lovely review. I had planned a Squeal long ago and I dedicate this first chapter to you. hope everyone enjoy the surprises. Let em know what you think.