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The Tangled Trilogy	By : wolfkin59 Category: Final Fantasy VII > General Views: 882 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor do I make money from the writing of this fan fic. Thus why it's FAN FICTION.

Chapter List
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Title: The Tangled Trilogy
Author: Cuzosu
Warning: Language, yaoi implications, Reno's luck and the author's sense of humor.
Summary: Returning from a mission, Reno and Rude discover they're in for more than they bargained for....
A/N: The reason this came about is because I was bored and my fellow Seventh Heaven member, Feidreva, made me a challenge. She wanted a fic with my humor, written with Reno in character, with the following requirements:
- Reno being nice, sexy, and funny, possibly all three at once.
- bath time for Reno
- Reno wipes Rude's bald head.
- A chocobo
- A guy of your choice appearing in the background wearing only his underwear
I took the challenge, responding with this little trilogy of Tangled, Two Tangled, and Entangled. There are hidden meanings to the names of the fic chapters, and I like it that way.

Tangled
They were TURKs. Everyone knew that TURKs were unscrupulous, heartless bastards, assassins for ShinRa, Corps., and a very deadly group of bodyguards that could easily be likened to a pack of feral dogs. Loyal only to their leaders, ready to tear apart anyone with the slightest provocation and no mercy, ruthless to the core.
However, Reno was Reno. He could be all of those things, Rude knew. But he also had a penchant for acting immature...and for being somewhat of a rebel. So it came as no surprise that Reno liked to pick fights—and to walk away from fights anyone but Rufus ShinRa, his boss Tseng, or his comrade and lover Rude started. The issue this time was...
He's a moron, Rude thought. Instead of returning to Midgar from their latest mission, the redhead had decided that they were going swimming—and not at Costa del Sol. It was too populated for Reno's tastes at the moment. (It was also on the other continent, and would take too long to get to for Reno's interest to hold.) No, they were going to swim in the river on their way back to Midgar from Junon. The bald man growled to himself again, shaking his head.
Oblivious, Reno cheerfully swiped a cloth over his partner's head, rubbing gently but firmly, ignoring the disgruntled noises this caused. Truth be told, the redhead was trying to be obnoxious. And he was succeeding.
Still, the blood from this last kill-ordered mission was being cleansed off the dark-skinned man's head, at least. Tseng had told them to make it look like a monster kill. So they had used weapons shaped like claws and fangs, had mutilated the bodies afterwards, and had subsequently gotten blood all over both them and the kill site (which was monster-accessible, because Tseng was perfectionist like that).
Apparently, Reno was too impatient to wait and clean up in either their home or headquarters. But then, he wouldn't have been Reno if he wasn't impatient. Thus, the stop at the river.
Rude shook his head. None of our bosses—or Elena, for that matter—would understand this without having it explained. Tseng and Rufus permit us our peculiarities, of course, but to them—it's a way of coping with our jobs. But for Reno, it wasn't stress relief. It wasn't coping. What it was...was his personality. It was the simple fact that Reno was, well, Reno. And Reno's impatient, Rude growled amusedly in his head as the helicopter landed more abruptly than anyone not regularly a passenger while Reno was flying would be prepared for. They were still close to Junon.
Reno dragged Rude out of the helicopter, a feat that might surprise those who didn't know the TURK* pair. The bald man was big, while the redhead was thin. But under that deceptive thinness was wiry muscle and speed, coupled with a natural grace in battle. Too bad the grace didn't quite carry over into the times when he was startled or overexcited.
Crimson hair spread like feathers on a bird's wing as Reno tripped—and forgot to release his handhold on Rude. The bald man fell like a stone, missing Reno only because he'd been in the process of trying to duck the helicopter's blades (the man was tall, after all) and had thus been yanked in a different direction when Reno tripped. Under his breath, Reno thanked Gaia that his larger and heavier partner hadn't fallen on him. It wasn't the weight he'd have had problems with, but his being the sudden stopping point for his partner's weight.
Rude rose to his feet with astonishing grace for a man his size, shaking his head and muttering under his breath at Reno. Far from being offended about the disparaging comments being made, the redhead grinned to himself.
Only me, he thought smugly, customary arrogance back in place. No one else can get Rude to talk as much as I can. He blithely ignored the fact that most of the time it was swearing or derogatory commentary.
Traversing the remnant of the few steps left from helicopter to river, they had no more incidents. After setting their spare suits** and shoes where they'd be left alone until reclaimed, the physically mismatched pair waded into the water to clean themselves of blood, and to attempt to clean the suits before the bloodstains became permanent.
As per the bald man's expectations, while his own suit was fairly easily cleaned, Reno's was a lost cause. Not only had it been more soaked in blood than his own, but the redhead had gotten all excited, which had raised his body temperature and helped to dry the blood faster—plus, he'd been close to the engine. Those bloodstains were not coming out. And since TURKs were trained to never leave evidence of their presence behind (excepting the bodies and whatever evidence their orders told them to), they started removing his suit so they could burn it later. Unfortunately, Reno somehow managed to get himself tangled in the pant legs with the help of the running water, lost his balance in a moment of perfect gracelessness, and was washed away down the river, spluttering and swearing violently.
Rude didn't even blink. He just rolled his eyes, growled one disgruntled remark, and dove under the water after his crimson-haired lover. This had been possible all along. Improbable, but possible. And so, in true TURK fashion, the large man swam, cutting through the water like a shark on the hunt as he barreled towards his unlucky partner.
It was only a few minutes before Rude caught Reno, but that was sufficient to carry them several miles out of their way—and when they climbed out of the water thanks to the slowing currents as it mixed with the ocean, they still had to trek back to the helicopter.
They lay on the shore for a short moment, recovering both from the suddenness of Reno's close call and from the force of the river current. Water was not known for mercy.
Reno recovered quickly. This may have been because he was too stubborn to stay immobile for any length of time. "'kay, Rude, I guess it's time to return to our TURK-ly duties."
Rude raised an eyebrow at the phrasing. "TURK-ly?" he rumbled. "I'm surprised you didn't say TURK-y," admitted the big man.
The redhead grinned. "Nah, Boss got pissed last time I called our duties TURK-y in his presence."
Dark-skinned Rude raised an eyebrow. Translated from Reno-ese to Wutaian, this most likely meant that Tseng had nearly had an apoplexy from rage. "He probably doesn't like you comparing top-notch assassins and bodyguards to dumb wild birds," he pointed out mildly.
Face scrunching up with a mix of amusement and denial, Reno countered with, "It was Thanksgiving, and he was trying to make us work!" Reno had been more intent on trying to eat - although what he'd been salivating over having in his mouth was most definitely unfit for polite conversation.
"We still wound up working," reasoned Rude. "More so, since you mouthed off and Tseng had to send you away or kill you horribly." And for any TURK, but most especially Tseng, that was a massive understatement.
"Tch, still," muttered Reno. "Boss-man overreacts a lot."
And you don't give him plenty of provocation? Rude wondered silently. Instead of saying it, he merely growled, "When we get back, we're still going to have to clean up."
"What? Why!" Reno demanded to know.
"Sea water."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"Salt."
"You're sayin' I don't taste good now?"
Rude glanced back over his shoulder as he began walking, said nothing, and continued on.
A quarter of a mile later, his attention was caught by a gagging sound from behind him. He looked back to see Reno grossing out over something. One dark eyebrow rose.
"... You were right," Reno told him after a short pause. Obviously irked, he stormed past his partner, heading right for the helicopter.
As the redhead passed, Rude caught a glimpse of something wet on Reno's hand. It was all the bald man could do not to grin.
Reno had tasted himself...and decided he was too salty.

*I was SO tempted to put TURK-ish

**Tseng would never allow any TURK to get away with wearing a suit that was less than clean in public unless there was a major point to be made...or unless Rufus ordered him to.
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The Tangled Trilogy