Adult-FanFiction.org : Final Fantasy

Crystal Clear	By : MystIc19 Category: Final Fantasy VII > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1058 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
- 17
Disclaimer: Seriously? I think you know the deal here >_<

The next few days seemed to pass by in a blur for the recruit. It didn�t seem like there was enough time in the day for him to get everything accomplished. He attended all of his classes as usual and then afterwards tried to make enough time to practice his sword skills as well as trying to fit in time to study and do his homework. It didn�t seem possible actually, especially when you figured Zack into the equation. Even though his SOLDIER exam was at the end of the week and he should�ve focused all of his attention to practice and studying he couldn�t help but get sidetracked down the line. However Zack was helping him�or at least that�s how it started out anyways, they would always seem to get distracted somehow though and move on to studying other things. They really didn�t seem to be able to keep their hands off of each other lately. But this was the night before the examinations, and the blonde was determined to make use of what little time he did have. There was no room for mistakes or do overs and he had to keep sight of that.

He was stretched out on Zack�s living room floor seeing as how the SOLDIER was sprawled on the couch. Cloud was up there for a little bit too but once Zack had fallen asleep he decided to move to the floor before he was kicked down onto it. Yeah, his boyfriend moved around a lot when he slept.

Frowning the blonde cast a look over his shoulder at the other. Zack was supposed to actually be helping him study, and while that was true Cloud didn�t really want to wake him. When Zack was asleep he looked like an innocent little kid and it made you not want to disturb him�and also Cloud was thankful for the silence. True Zack helped him study, but he talked a lot throughout the whole process which made it difficult to really focus on things. Maybe that was why they always got sidetracked, after all it was either that or the way Zack would start to kiss on the recruits neck�maybe it was the latter.

Shaking his head Cloud ran a hand over his face. He wasn�t focused, and more so he was beginning to doze off himself.

�Spike?� Zack�s sleepy voice asked as he lifted himself up a bit to glance down at the blonde on the floor. �What time is it?�

�I don�t know,� Cloud replied with a sigh, �almost ten I guess.�

Reaching over the SOLDIER picked up his watch that was set on the table and glanced at it before his eyes widened a bit. �Cloud it�s almost midnight!�

�What?� The blonde replied while sitting up and taking the watch away from the other to take a look for himself. It looked like time really had gotten away from him.

�You need to sleep,� Zack began while climbing off of the couch and closing and picking up the books that were on the ground, �it�s not going to do you any good if you know everything for the exams and don�t get up in time to take them.�

Nodding Cloud glanced at the ground as Zack picked up the last remaining book. He was right though, it wouldn�t be good if he went to the examinations dead tired, he needed to be sharp. Though he highly doubted that he would be even the least bit tired, even if he had only one hour of sleep, he was just way to nervous.

He felt himself being dragged to the bedroom as he listened to Zack chatter away about how he was just as nervous about his exams but that there was really nothing to it in the end.

He knew that the SOLDIER was only trying to calm him and make him feel better but it didn�t. Of course there was nothing to it for Zack, everyone expected someone like Zack to make SOLDIER�but him?

�It�ll be over before you know it. That�ll be a relief right?� Zack asked as he wrapped his arms around the blonde as they settled into bed.

�Yeah,� Cloud began with a short nod before looking up at the other, �after tomorrow everything will go back to normal�or at least calm down.�

Grinning Zack placed a small kiss on the boys lips, �so try to relax, and get some sleep okay?�

Cloud only smiled a bit in response before resting against Zack as his eyes began to fall close.

Running his fingers through blonde spikes Zack let out a small sigh while looking away from Cloud�s slowly closing glowing eyes. Everything will go back to normal? I hope.

************************************************************************

�Time to celebrate!� Kyo exclaimed while throwing his arms up in the air and grinning like an idiot.

Cloud shot him a strange look as they walked back to the barracks. The day was finally over. It was a very long day, starting from early morning and going until late afternoon. Most of it being because so much time was given for the written examination, partly of which Cloud was confused. He had finished the written with plenty of time to spare and had honestly thought that they had been given too much time for it. But he couldn�t do anything but wait until the time had passed and marked the end of the exam. The physical portion wasn�t as long once you were actually there, but it took time seeing as how you were put into groups of four and evaluated from there�and there were hundreds of recruits. It was definitely challenging, but it wasn�t anything that the blonde hadn�t expected. And the Sergeants and Colonels who were in charge of everything we�re nice. Luckily Sergeant Okuda wasn�t one of them, he just knew he would make it the worst situation ever. For the past week in class he seemed to still be trying to tear away any shred of hope that Cloud had of making it into SOLDIER. He really didn�t understand why that guy hated him so much. But it didn�t matter and if all worked out in his favor he wouldn�t have to see Okuda ever again�except maybe in passing. But that all depended on how things turned out.

�Celebrate? Why, we didn�t get results yet,� Cloud began while rubbing at his arm that was now slightly sore from all of the sword wielding from earlier.

�Doesn�t matter,� Kyo replied, �we made it this far Cloud! And if anything we should celebrate for all the hard work we did! Fuck the results, I�m happy with knowing I tried my best! And that�s what we�ll celebrate.�

Glancing at Kyo with a questioning look his friend shook his head.

�Alright well maybe not fuck the results, but still we should celebrate. We accomplished a lot!�

That was definitely true, a lot had been accomplished. Besides, it was a nice feeling to know that the exams were over�of course the waiting for the results were nerve racking, but still none the less it was a weight lifted off of his shoulders.

�Yeah you�re right,� Cloud replied wit a bit of a nod as a small smile graced his face. He shouldn�t lock himself up in his room for the night, that would only allow his mind to roam and he would worry about the results. At least if he were out he would have something to keep him busy. He really wouldn�t mind staying in if he were with Zack but he knew the SOLDIER was tied up with work for pretty much the whole evening and sitting alone in his apartment didn�t sound too appealing.

Glad that he got his friend to agree Kyo grinned while explaining that they should go and get smashed. Cloud really wasn�t expecting anything else, and though he was sure he would never get drunk again like he had that night when he was out with Zack a while back he wasn�t opposed to the idea of at least having a few drinks.

It didn�t take them long to head out, they made it back to their room to change out of their training gear and take quick showers and then they were gone. Maybe a part of it was just trying to get away from the facility since they had been practically on lock down for the past few weeks with all of the studying and anticipation for the exams.

Kyo hadn�t mentioned about inviting any of his other friends and Cloud was glad about that since he really couldn�t stand them. They decided to stay on the top plate this time and ended up back at the same bar that Cloud had went to with Zack. He guessed it really was the spot for Shinra employees up there on the top plate. And it looked like he and Kyo weren�t the only ones who wanted to go out and celebrate that night. The place was crowded and the blonde recognized almost every person in there from his classes and saw mostly all of them earlier at examinations.

�Think we�ll be able to get any service around here,� Kyo began with a laugh while taking a seat at a small table that was off to the side of the room.

�If we�re lucky,� Cloud replied while glancing around at the bustling bar before taking a seat at the table.

�Hey boys what�ll you have!?� A cheery voice broke in over all of the loud chatter in the place.

Turning a bit Cloud was now face to face with the girl that he deemed a clown the first time he saw her.

�Hey you! I haven�t seen you for a while!� The girl exclaimed once she noticed the blonde.

�Hey Tanya, I haven�t been here since the last time,� Cloud explained.

�Oh that�s too bad, you shouldn�t be a stranger,� Tanya continued while stepping aside to make room for some people who were passing by before winking at a few guys that had just entered the place, �where�s Zack?� She quickly added as her eyes seemed to sparkle upon mentioning the SOLDIER.

�Oh I didn�t come with him this time,� Cloud replied while nodding at his friend, �I came with Kyo.�

�Nice to meet ya cutie,� Tanya began with a giant smile while turning her focus to the other recruit. �I�ll bring out some beers for you two, on the house!� She exclaimed with a flip of her hair while walking back to the counter but not before engaging in a few small conversations on the way and laughing flirtatiously.

�She sure is lively,� Kyo began while watching the waitress.

�Yeah,� Cloud replied with a shake of his head as he looked away from the girl.

Stretching a bit Kyo leaned back in his chair as he looked around the bustling bar, �I think this is actually the worst part of the whole exam.�

�What do you mean?� Cloud asked while focusing his attention on the other.

�The wait, even though it only takes a day that�s twenty-four hours too long,� Kyo explained while moving back to lean on the table.

�I know,� the blonde mumbled while dropping his gaze.

�You don�t have anything to be worried about, the General practically gave you the okay way before examinations,� Kyo said with a laugh, �you�re as good as in.�

Frowning a bit Cloud shook his head, �He just gave me a compliment, it wasn�t like he accepted me then and there.�

�Still I think I would feel a lot more reassured if he had said something like that to me,� Kyo continued just as Tanya came back with the drinks.

�Here you go boys! You need anything else you just call for me okay!� She explained while setting down the drinks and smiling brightly, �Tell Zack I said hi won�t ya?�

�Sure,� Cloud replied with a nod offering a small smile. It was kind of amusing how she had no idea that she was talking to the person that was dating her crush�or one of her many crushes anyways. Turning on her heels she walked away disappearing into the large crowd.

�Speaking of the General,� Kyo began while popping the cap of his beer and taking a sip, �I didn�t see him at all today. I thought he would be around.�

�I didn�t seem him either,� Cloud responded before taking a drink as well.

�Probably better that we didn�t,� Kyo said with a grin, �he�d probably freak us out and make everyone nervous if he was there.�

Cloud couldn�t help but laugh, Kyo was right. There was just something about Sephiroth that intimidated you, no matter how many times you might�ve saw the man. He just seemed to carry that sort of god like quality and yet he could strike fear into you by just a single glance. Even now that Cloud had been in his presence more than a few times he still became nervous and thought that he probably always would. He didn�t know how Zack did it, how he could just be so casual and joke around with him like he would anybody else. But then again they worked together all the time and he knew Zack knew Sephiroth better than anybody else did, so maybe that�s what allowed that comfortable environment. But Cloud was just a recruit, and even if he did make it to SOLDIER he would still always see General Sephiroth as someone intimidating. He wondered if he could ever someday really be on his same level�that was a long shot though.

The night continued on and the blonde had stopped with the drinks when he had started to become just a little tipsy, even though Kyo had tried to get him to continue drinking. Some of Kyo�s friends had ended up coming to the bar and they instantly attached themselves to the table, pulling up chairs and inviting themselves over. Though they didn�t really say anything to the blonde, which he was glad for. He would rather have them not to talk him at all then have them talk to him and say something stupid. But even so just their loud voices and obnoxious laughter started to get to him after awhile. They were the kind of guys who were big and muscular but seriously lacked in brains and honestly the stuff they talked about just didn�t interest him. It was strange, Kyo was great to hang out with and he could talk to him easily and for that reason he didn�t understand how his friend could associate with these guys. But he guessed there was something there that he just wasn�t seeing. He moved away from the table letting Kyo know he would be back so that his friend wouldn�t look for him later. After being in the bar for so long he was starting to get a little crowded and desperately needed to get some air. Stepping out of the loud place he took in a breath before exhaling. It was nice to breathe in air that wasn�t mixed with cigarette smoke. Moving away from the entrance he leaned up against the wall while glancing at his watch. He was sure Zack was probably back by now, and if he wasn�t he could always stop by the office if he really wanted. He didn�t do it much but Zack had assured him it wasn�t a problem and that he could come by whenever. But he guessed after getting caught in there that one time by Sephiroth it just always felt wrong to go unless he was actually with Zack.

Looking up he focused on a street lamp that was on the edge of the sidewalk illuminating the dark street. He probably should tell Kyo that he was just going to leave, after all he hadn�t seen Zack since way early in the morning and he was sure that the other wanted to know how his exams had went. But then again he probably shouldn�t leave without Kyo, he knew his friend was pretty drunk and he didn�t trust him to make it back by himself and he honestly didn�t really count on Kyo�s friends.

�What are you doing out here?�

Tearing his gaze away from the street lamp Cloud let his eyes fall onto the boy who was just standing a few feet away from him.

�The party�s inside isn�t it?� The recruit continued while taking a step closer to the blonde.

�It is,� Cloud began while keeping his eyes on Jin, �so why aren�t you in there?�

�I was getting a headache,� Jin replied with a wave of his hand, �too loud I guess.�

Keeping his gaze on him a moment longer Cloud looked away while focusing on the street and some cars passing by.

�Can�t wait for results huh?� Jin asked while falling back onto the wall a little roughly.

�Who isn�t a little anxious,� Cloud replied simply while still keeping his gaze averted.

Jin chuckled a bit while running a hand through his hair that was already slightly disheveled, �true I guess,� he replied before becoming silent for a moment, �but you�re top in the class right? What do you have to be anxious about?�

Glancing at the other from the corner of his eye Cloud frowned. Was that supposed to be sarcastic? He really couldn�t tell and turned around fully to look at the other, ready to say something smart before he caught the sincere look on the others face. He was completely thrown by that, the expression he was used to seeing on the boys face was a cocky smirk.

�I�I�m not top in the class,� Cloud replied quietly while glancing away for a moment.

�Don�t be modest,� Jin began with a laugh and rolling his eyes slightly. �You know it�s true. Why would you say otherwise? Because of Okuda?� He asked with a bit of a laugh, �he�s an asshole, I wouldn�t listen to anything he said.�

What!? Now the blonde was completely confused. Jin was bad mouthing Sergeant Okuda? He thought those two were like best friends the way that it seemed like they always plotted against him, so what the hell was up with the three sixty? Then again�

�Oh,� the blonde began with a bit of a smirk, �I get it, now that you�re practically out of his class you don�t have to kiss his ass anymore. So now he�s a bad guy and you�ll stick up for me? Yeah thanks Jin.� He couldn�t help but say something smart to him, after all it was how they interacted with each other. And besides Cloud really didn�t want Jin to try to get on his good side now, knowing him he was probably just doing it for status reasons. Since he heard General Sephiroth compliment him maybe he thought it was a good idea to be associated with him now, who knew, he honestly didn�t know how the kid worked but he just knew he really couldn�t be trusted.

Jin was silent as he kept his eyes on the ground for a second before looking up to meet blue eyes. �I deserve that,� he started, �but I do still mean what I said.�

�Yeah, I didn�t need you to tell me that. I already knew,� Cloud replied coldly. Mean? No way, sure Jin was sometimes unpredictable and yeah he had covered for him when they were at the General�s office after their fight, but it was the least he could do! He was the one who had started the whole thing. He was the one who started all of their confrontations and the blonde wasn�t about to let one nice act mix him all up. Because all of the times before that this kid in front of him had made being in Midgar worse than it already was. He had made him feel like he was worthless and wouldn�t amount to anything in Shinra, and now because what he was acknowledged by General Sephiroth he was trying to change his tune? No, it didn�t work that way.

Turning around the blonde was just about to enter into the bar again to go retrieve his friend when Jin spoke up again.

�For what it�s worth Cloud,� he began while moving away from the wall, �I never doubted your potential. I know I didn�t show it in the least, but I never doubted it�not once.�

Pausing for a moment at the entrance Cloud kept his back to the recruit. Jin�s words had sounded sincere but�that didn�t mean anything. Pulling open the door he stepped inside leaving the other out front. He didn�t know what the hell Jin was up to, but he really didn�t care to find out.

************************************************************************

�Are they serious!? Do they like to torture us?� Kyo continued to rant while tapping the table, �who the hell can eat right now!?�

Sighing Cloud looked over at his friend with an understanding look on his face before glancing back down to his dinner that remained untouched. And glancing around the cafeteria he could clearly see that he wasn�t the only one who wasn�t eating. It was impossible to try to consume any type of food when your stomach was in knots. They had announced that the results for the SOLDIER exams would be released after the dinner hour�which was just the worst thing to do. And to make matters worse the supposed hour was passing by way too slowly, maybe because everyone was focused on the clock or something.

�And what is this crap anyways?� Kyo continued while now stabbing some of the items on his plate with a fork.

Grabbing his glass of water Cloud drank it steadily, that was the only thing he could put in his mouth right now seeing as how it was constantly becoming dry. He could hear the sound of his drinking it was so quiet in the place, and it was never quiet in the cafeteria�looks like the anticipation was making people unable to talk also.

Finally however after what seemed like hours the cafeteria was officially closed for the evening and every recruit in the room made a mad dash for the door where they ran down the halls until they came to the bulletin board. Cloud wasn�t about to be the last one seeing as how if he was he wouldn�t be able to read the board over all of the recruits heads, so he made sure he was one of the first ones with Kyo right on his heels.

The list was really long but short and to the point, it had the names of the recruits followed by a simple pass or fail, no more no less.

The hall was already becoming loud as what were once recruits found their names on the list and saw that they were now SOLDIERS. Cheering and laughter began to fill the place as others crowded around the board.

�Yes!!� The blonde heard his friend shout from behind him, �I passed!�

While Cloud wanted to congratulate his friend he was still trying to find his name in the long list�and then when he did he was wishing that he hadn�t. There it was in black and white, Cloud Strife, Fail. He took a step away from the wall in surprise, but not before he caught glimpse of another name. Jin Barton, Pass. Was it really so shocking? Stepping out of the crowd that had now formed around him he walked further down the hall in a state of shock before letting his eyes drift to Kyo who was laughing and cheering with his other friends who he was sure had passed as well. And instead of feeling happy for Kyo at that moment, he was pretty much despising him. What the hell had he done different than him!? For the most part Cloud had been helping Kyo with his studies both bookwork and in field training! So if he passed then why not him!?

The cheering in the place was starting to become to much for him and he quickly made his way down the hall before exiting the building. He didn�t have a place there, everyone was rejoicing and that was something that he could take part in. He felt like he was in a dream, actually a nightmare, a hazy fog. It didn�t seem real�no, it didn�t seem fair. He didn�t understand why he didn�t pass and there wasn�t a person who could tell him that he didn�t work his ass off for this. He felt more confused than ever, he gave everything that he had in that exam and still�it wasn�t enough. Then what the hell was enough!?

Running his hands through his hair in frustration he tried to blink back the tears that he could feel already stinging his eyes.

�Cloud?� a voice came, soft and a little unsure.

Turning around Cloud sucked in a breath unaware that someone had been following him. He really really didn�t want to be bothered right now. Especially with him.

�I don�t want to hear it Jin, just go away,� he began surprisingly calm as he wiped away at the tears that had begun to roll down his face.

�Cloud I�m so sorry,� Jin began while walking over to the other, �I don�t understand it�really you should�ve passed. Maybe there was a mistake or something.�

�Stop!� The blonde shouted. Really, he didn�t need Jin to rub salt in the wound. Trying to make excuses and staying in denial wasn�t going to help. It was what it was�he didn�t pass. And while he thought for sure he would it just didn�t prove to be true. Looks like Okuda and everyone else was right after all. And wasn�t Jin in that category? He didn�t even know why he was there, why couldn�t he just go away? Even now at his lowest moment he was still bothering him. �Just�don�t,� he continued a bit more softly, �please,� he finished while walking over to one of the benches out front and taking a seat before covering his face with his hands.

Sighing Jin remained still for a moment. It wasn�t fair, why didn�t Cloud make it? He felt bad for him, if anything Cloud earned a place in SOLDIER unlike him. Even if he had hadn�t scored well enough knowing his dad he would probably change the results somehow, anything to make sure his son wasn�t a failure. He couldn�t help but wonder for a moment if his dad had something to do with Cloud�s results, but that couldn�t be it�or at least he sure as hell hoped it wasn�t.

Walking over to the other he took a seat beside him on the bench, he really wanted to say something to make him feel better, but he knew there wasn�t much he could say. And even so, it probably wouldn�t mean much to the blonde coming from him. It hurt Jin a little to know that but hell it was his own damn fault anyways. He had made the bad relationship between he and Cloud, not really of his own free will, it was what his dad wanted. He somehow had the strange mentality that if he could crush Cloud�s spirits that it would make his progression harder. Yeah, his dad was definitely a paranoid one, and very competitive. Since the beginning he had made it a goal for Jin to be better than the blonde, even though Jin didn�t really care, but his dad had told him that in Shinra that was how things worked. Rank was everything, and so you had to make sure you surpassed everyone if you wanted to move up. And apparently to Okuda that was what was most important, to hell with who you hurt on the way there. And it looks like that was what Jin had been doing all along, even though he didn�t really want to. But his dad was a Sergeant, he had to listen to him�or at least that was how it was. But lately he didn�t seem to really care and he felt stupid for even listening to his father in the slightest bit. Maybe it was because he actually really admired Cloud and couldn�t stand being a jerk towards him anymore, it hardly seemed right at all. And admiration was even a bit of a loose term for how he felt towards the recruit�

�You win right?� Cloud asked while pulling his hands away from his face, �is that why you�re out here? Just to gloat?�

Blinking Jin turned and looked at the blonde. He looked completely defeated, an expression that he had never seen on the boy�s face, not once, even after all the crap he knew he had gone through since enrolling in the program.

�No,� Jin replied with a quick shake of his head, �I don�t care about any of that I�just wanted to make sure you were okay.�

�Why?� Cloud asked skeptically. Was this the part where Jin was going to say just kidding! And laugh his ass off at him?

�Because,� Jin began with a bit of a laugh, �as contradicting as I know this sounds, in the end I didn�t want to see you hurt like this.� I was hoping you would prove my father wrong.

Pulling back a bit the blonde stared hard at the other. Did he hear him right? Since when did Jin give a damn about him anyways? He didn�t seem too caring when he had given him a black eye before. He met the others gaze and surprisingly it looked like there was sincerity in his eyes�which was odd. But Jin had managed to confuse him many times before, the kid was just�strange, and he probably never would understand him like the other had stated before.

�Jin!!�

The two recruits broke their gaze before looking over at the two of Jin�s friends that he seemed to always be accompanied by. �Come on let�s go! Everyone�s going to the bar for drinks!� One of them explained while the other seemed to be giving Jin a strange look for being with the blonde.

Glancing back to Cloud Jin was about to speak before the other cut in.

�That�s where you should be,� Cloud began, �with your friends,� he finished while making sure to focus on the word friends before meeting the others gaze again.

�Right,� Jin replied with a short nod. It seemed Cloud didn�t want his company and he made it clear that they weren�t friends, it was too little too late perhaps. He wanted to say more but thought better of it while letting his gaze linger for just a bit longer on the recruit.

Cloud noticed the look that Jin was giving him, it was kind of like the one he had encountered before when they were sparring, the one that would always make him look away or feel uncomfortable and this time was no different.

After the blonde looked away Jin finally tore his gaze away and got up and walked across to his friends.

Looking back over to where Jin and his friends were now walking down the street Cloud ran a hand over his face, he thought the whole thing with Jin was weird but he was honestly still too upset to even really give it any thought.

He watched as a few more recruits�or rather newly SOLDIERS made their way out of the building still cheering and chattering obviously going out to celebrate as well. He didn�t even want to be anywhere near the damn Shinra building anymore, not when everything and everyone was about SOLDIER right now. Getting up from off of the bench he started to walk, passing by a whole bunch of people who didn�t even notice him. He started to realize that that was how it was going to be. All of his fellow classmates that had moved up in rank were now going to just blow past him as if he were a nobody. Not that they ever really paid much attention to him before.

Before he realized it he was standing in front of Zack�s apartment and reaching in his pocket for the key that Zack had insisted on giving him. He pushed open the door and frowned when he realized it was dark in the place, Zack must�ve not been back yet. He walked in a bit further and flipped on the light before slipping off his shoes.

�Zack,� he called weakly while walking back to the bedroom. He knew Zack wasn�t there, he would�ve found the blonde already to figure out how he did on the exam. Collapsing onto the bed Cloud closed his eyes. He wondered what Zack would think when he found out that he didn�t pass. The SOLDIER had helped him so much and it was basically for nothing.

Fresh tears began to form in the boys eyes and he buried his face in the pillow. He hated the trainee program, it didn�t help him to reach his goal at all. He left his crappy little town to make something of himself and he couldn�t even do that. He might as well just go back to Nibelheim.

He heard the sound of keys dropping on the table which meant that Zack was back, but he didn�t move from his spot.

The SOLDIER knew that Cloud was there seeing as how the lights were on and his pair of shoes were by the door. Usually at this time though on a weekend he would come back to find the boy curled up on the couch and watching TV. Never was it this quiet, which didn�t paint a pretty picture. He walked down the hall and pushed open the slightly open door to his room where he found Cloud lying down on the bed with his face buried in a pillow.

�Spike?� Zack asked softly while walking into the room. He wasn�t sure if he was asleep or not and if it weren�t for the quiet sniffling he heard he probably would�ve thought otherwise. That however just confirmed what the other had been already thinking, the results hadn�t been so good.

�Cloud,� Zack began while sitting down on the bed and leaning over the blonde a little while rubbing his back soothingly, �babe, it�s okay.�

That only seemed to make Cloud more upset and he let out another sob, his body shaking as he tried to suppress the cries.

This was what Zack didn�t want, this was what he feared the most. He knew that not passing the examinations would break Cloud�s heart, he knew that he wanted this more than anything and he didn�t want to see him break like this. It hurt him more than anything to see him this way.

�Cloud,� he tried again trying to get a response from the other, �come here babe,� he spoke softly while practically prying Cloud away from the pillow that he had been clutching onto. Once he had pulled him up though Cloud instantly clung to him squeezing him tighter than he had ever done before as he buried his face in his chest and continued to cry.

�I really thought I had a chance,� the blonde explained between cries before shaking his head, �I don�t know why�I don�t get it.�

Zack sighed as he continued to hold Cloud tight against him. He wished he could answer him, but truth was he didn�t know why either. Cloud was the best in his class, he had witnessed that first hand and so did Sephiroth so why�

Pulling back a bit Zack placed his finger under the blondes chin and tipped up his head where he met sad glowing blue eyes and a tear streaked face. It hadn�t changed, Cloud�s eyes were still very similar to his�could that be the reason for his results? What was going on that Professor Hojo hadn�t told boy?

�I really don�t either,� Zack began while wiping away a few of his boyfriends tears, �but Cloud no matter what some exam may say you still have the skills.�

�Apparently not,� Cloud replied while pulling his head back and dropping his gaze.

�Hey come on don�t say that,� Zack started with a shake of his head, �there�s always next year.� Even he knew that didn�t sound too comforting after it had already escaped from his lips.

�Next year!?� Cloud began angrily while pulling away from Zack altogether, �and what in the meantime be stuck in Okuda�s class for another year!? I won�t do that, I put myself through all of this once but I won�t do it again!�

�It�s not fair I know,� Zack started before Cloud quickly cut in.

�No you don�t know!� Cloud ranted �You made it into SOLDIER easily and even moved up to first class without any problems! You didn�t go through half the stuff I went through! You didn�t have to try to prove yourself to everyone every damn day!�

Cloud was really upset, Zack knew that so he didn�t really think to much about the blonde yelling at him. He understood him, he knew he was frustrated and hurting and was just taking out his aggression.

�I�m not arguing that with you babe, I know you�ve had it hard here. And I wanted nothing more than for you to pass because I know you deserved too,� Zack explained calmly while keeping his voice soft.

�I hate it here,� Cloud mumbled while running a hand through his hair, �there�s really nothing here for me, it�s all just the same.�

Zack was silent not really knowing how to respond to that. He knew that Cloud always wasn�t really fond of Midgar for reasons that were obvious, and he knew that with the recent turn of events it was only going to make the place seem worse.

Turning his gaze back to Zack once he realized exactly what he had said he moved back over to the other before wrapping his arms around him tightly. �I didn�t mean that,� he said apologetically. He was angry, but not at Zack and he couldn�t take out his frustration on him, it wasn�t right. And if anything Zack was the sole reason for why he decided to stick around the place at all, if you took him away though then the blonde was sure he would leave right about now.

�I know babe,� Zack replied while wrapping his arms around the blonde tightly before placing a kiss on top of his head.

�What do you think I did wrong?� Cloud asked quietly.

�I don�t know,� Zack responded with a sigh, �I honestly can�t think of a reason myself.�

It became quiet in the room after that as they remained in each others arms, Zack lightly stroking the blondes hair. They stayed that way for a while, not paying attention to the time and Zack really didn�t know how long. He thought that the other had fallen asleep but he spoke up shortly after that.

�So then�why didn�t they want me?� Cloud asked innocently, his voice tired and still a bit sad. Though he seemed to be talking more in his sleep than anything.

Glancing down Zack pulled back a little to see that Cloud�s eyes were shut. He was probably on the very edge of falling into full sleep, which Zack was glad for because he couldn�t answer that question, and the way he asked it made his heart ache.

He gently pulled away from the recruit momentarily as he eased him back onto the bed. He didn�t want to disturb him, the day was long and he needed to rest. Cloud shifted a bit as his eyes opened briefly and then they were closed again as Zack laid back next to him and took him in his arms.

He wanted to make everything better, but the only thing he could really do at the moment was just be there. Just hold and comfort him and let him know that he was still worth something, that he wasn�t worthless. Zack wasn�t going to let him go back to that, to allow his self esteem to drop again. And he definitely was going to find out the reason for the outcome of the results, that he was sure of.

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A/N: Well there's chapter 16, I think this is the longest that I've taken to update with this story, so i apologize for the lateness. It's been a mixture of being busy and getting distracted. Anyway, this was either going to be one really long chapter or broken up into two, so I decided to break it up which means 17 is already being written! And I put a lot of Jin stuff in here, hopefully the puzzle is coming together for you guys! And I know everyone has their theory about Hojo and why Cloud's eyes already hold the mako glow but ill answer that soon too . And also just want to thank everyone who reviewed chap 15. I was sort of nervous writing that one but you guys made me feel better with your reviews, as always! So thanks so much! Will update soon!
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