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Crystal Clear	By : MystIc19 Category: Final Fantasy VII > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1058 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Twirling the wooden sword in his hand once more the blonde let out a sigh before glancing at the clock. It was almost ten at night now, though it didn�t really matter, curfew wasn�t in effect for him anymore since he had gone into Special Ops. He had been in the gym practicing for the past few hours, he didn�t like to sit around for to long when he could be doing something productive. Not to mention it helped him clear his mind. He couldn�t lie that every time the gym doors swung open he would tense up before looking over quickly to see if it was Jin. It had been a few weeks since that incident and he had only seen him a few times after, mostly on his watch shifts when the other would happen to pass by. And the strange thing was that Jin would still try to talk to him, like things�were fine. And in actuality things were not fine. Cloud honestly didn�t know what the hell was going on in the others head, maybe he was just stressing out over the fact that the board had demoted him. He wasn�t sure, but regardless he wanted to keep his distance from him. Jin was very unpredictable and he had made it clear that he really didn�t give a damn that the recruit was with Zack, he seemed to have the mentality that he wanted the blonde and that�s what he would get.

Running a hand through damp spikes Cloud closed his eyes briefly while setting down the sword. He knew something like this couldn�t be good, with Jin being as stubborn as he was and Zack being so protective of him�it was a train wreck waiting to happen and Cloud was the witness to it all and yet he didn�t know what he could do to stop it.

Letting out a tired sigh he took a seat on the edge of the blue mats while trying to catch his breath. His mind was so jumbled with thoughts that he didn�t even hear the gym door open or the sound of footsteps nearing.

He let out a small gasp when his vision was robbed from him by someone placing their hands over his eyes from behind him.

�Guess who,� came the voice of his boyfriend. Even with his eyes covered the blonde could hear the smile in his voice.

Giving a bit of a smirk Cloud decided to play along. �Uh�Kyo?�

Zack laughed lightly while still keeping his hands covering the recruits eyes. �Nope,� he began while leaning forward a bit more to speak near the others ear, �but let me give you a hint,� he finished before nipping the blonde�s earlobe and placing a few kisses on his neck.

�Zack!� Cloud shrieked while pulling away quickly, �we�re in the gym, someone could come in,� he explained as his eyes darted around the place.

�Oh don�t be so paranoid,� the SOLDIER replied before leaning in and kissing the blonde, only to have him pull away once again.

�Zack stop,� Cloud replied with a laugh while pushing against Zack�s chest.

�But I haven�t seen you all day,� Zack continued while putting on his best sad look. Cloud was used to this expression though. However that didn�t mean he wouldn�t give in from time to time.

�Yeah�it has been a long day huh?� Cloud began while easing up a little and letting his hand drop from Zack�s chest.

�It has,� the SOLDIER said softly while moving beside Cloud and placing his arm around him before pulling him closer.

Finally giving in the recruit closed his eyes and leaned into his boyfriend. He didn�t care if someone came in and saw them and he definitely knew Zack didn�t mind.

�You were already gone this morning when I woke up,� Cloud said softly as he felt the arm around him tighten.

�Yeah, I had a meeting to go to early before my day even really started. I think I fell asleep in it though because�I don�t remember what it was about,� Zack explained with a grin.

Cloud couldn�t help but to laugh, �what else is new?�

�Hey,� Zack shot back while pulling at a strand of blonde hair, still keeping his grin in tact.

Cloud only continued to laugh as he brought his hand up and rested it on Zack�s knee absentmindedly.

�It�s never usually this quiet now,� Zack said with a raised eyebrow while glancing at the clock on the wall.

�Yeah well,� the blonde began while letting his eyes shift to the clock as well, �a lot of people are on assignments. Besides it�s late so that�s probably the best time to come here if you don�t want to be bothered�that or early in the morning,� he added.

�Oh yeah, just like when I was training you huh?� Zack began with a chuckle. He remembered how out of it Cloud was that early in the morning, it took him a while to adjust.

�I still think you did that just to mess with me,� Cloud replied.

�Maybe,� Zack said with a tilt of his head, �but you learned right?�

�Yeah,� Cloud said while pulling away a bit from the other and studying him for a minute. �But not everything?�

�Like?� Zack asked confused.

The blonde smiled before standing up and holding out his hand, �you said maybe one day I�d be expert at it. But how is that going to happen if you don�t teach me?�

Still confused Zack sat there for a moment staring at the extended hand before it finally hit him. Reaching back he grabbed the handle of the buster sword. �Oh yeah that�s right. You sure you want to try it out?�

�Of course I�m sure!� Cloud snapped with a bit of a frown. Ever since he had seen the sword in Zack�s apartment that first time he went there he had wanted to wield it.

�Alright,� Zack replied with a smile. His boyfriends snappy reply was enough to convince him. He pulled the sword out of its sheath with ease and held it out to the blonde.

He watched Cloud stare at it in awe for a second before taking it from him. He grasped it with both hands quickly and staggered forward a bit.

�Careful, it�s heavy,� Zack warned as Cloud gave a nod.

�How do you make this look so easy?� The recruit asked while lifting it better and getting into a simple formation.

�Practice,� Zack replied while scuffing a hand through his hair.

Trying a few swings Cloud lowered the sword allowing it to rest on the mat. He knew it was going to be heavy but Shiva. He heard Zack laugh and he shot him a look before cracking a smile.

�Here,� the SOLDIER started while stepping further onto the mat, �hold it like this,� he explained while positioning the boys hands on the handle, �and widen your stance, it�ll help your balance.�

�Like this?� Cloud asked while moving his feet a bit.

�Yeah,� Zack replied with a nod, �can�t you feel the difference?�

Nodding Cloud took a few practice swings as Zack stepped back. He wasn�t as quick to drop the sword or stagger this time but it was still heavy�and his arms were still scrawny. But he would master this, it was no secret that Zack was stronger than him but he hoped that maybe one day he would be just as strong as him too. And who knows, maybe he would be expert with the buster sword too just like Zack had told him so long ago.

�Don�t let it control you Spike,� Zack continued to coach from the side as he smiled at the other. Cloud was actually doing pretty well with it considering it was the first time he wielded it. Not even some first class SOLDIERS could hold it up for as long as the recruit was.

Swinging it again the blonde tried to steady his balance but he couldn�t help it. He wasn�t trying to let it control him but with every swing it pulled him along with it because of it�s enormous weight. Finally after a bit more he lowered the sword quickly letting it rest against the mat, his arms aching from just a short amount of time.

�That was good,� Zack began while stepping closer and patting Cloud on the back, �you don�t want to over do it at the beginning.� Taking the sword from the other he raised it up with one hand before placing it back in it�s sheath easily.

�You�ll teach me then?� Cloud asked a little breathlessly while looking towards the other.

�Of course!� Zack beamed while wrapping his arm around the boys shoulders, �you have to learn from the best right?�

Laughing lightly the blonde closed his eyes when he felt Zack press a kiss to the side of his temple. �Right,� he replied softly.

They made their way out of the gym engaged in conversation as Zack kept his arm draped around the blonde�s shoulders.

An extra set of footsteps could be heard off in the distance, echoing in the empty hallways of the facility. A white lab coat came into view as a figure emerged from around the corner, their face buried in a folder before looking up and giving a bit of a smile.

�Well good evening you two,� the Professor spoke while approaching the two.

�Sir,� Cloud replied as they came to a halt.

�Zack,� Hojo began while shifting his gaze from Cloud to the other, �Do you know if the General is still in his office?�

�Uh he should be,� the SOLDIER started while glancing at his watch, �I just left from there not to long ago and he was. Knowing him he stays for a while.�

�I figured the same,� the Professor replied with a bit of a smirk before looking back to the blonde. �Oh Cloud I spoke to Sephiroth not long ago about you. I hope I didn�t worry you about any comments I may have made the last time we saw each other. I think you may have misunderstood.�

Comments? Taking in a breath Cloud glanced at the floor shyly before shaking his head. He knew what the Professor was talking about, and in truth he had been worried about what he had said. Which is why he had talked to the General about it. But he figured he was just being paranoid.

�Oh well I�� he started before biting his lip and falling silent.

The professor let out a small chuckle before speaking up, �no please no need to explain. It was my fault, I can understand how you might�ve taken what I said wrongly. But I assure you just like I told Sephiroth, everything�s fine. You have nothing to worry about.�

Frowning slightly Zack looked at Cloud and then to Hojo.

�Thank you sir,� Cloud replied while lifting his gaze. �Sorry for causing any trouble.�

�No trouble at all Cloud, you were right to question,� the Professor continued before adjusting his glasses. �Anyhow, I better be off if I intend to catch the General. You two have a nice night,� he finished before glancing at Zack�s arm around the recruit and giving a smile.

�Yeah, goodnight sir,� Cloud spoke with a slight blush as he caught the knowing expression on the Professor�s face.

�Later professor,� Zack replied casually as the man began to walk away. He turned his focus to Cloud afterwards giving him a questioning look.

�What?� The blonde asked as he started to walk pulling away from Zack�s hold.

�What was that all about?� Zack asked while walking to catch up to the recruit.

�Oh nothing,� Cloud replied with a shake of his head, �I ran into him one day and he said something about my eyes, how they hold the glow of Mako. And I just�well I was a little concerned about it I guess and I asked General Sephiroth if he thought it was something serious. It was nothing though.�

The SOLDIER was silent as he registered what the other had quickly explained to him. He had noticed the change in Cloud�s eyes a while ago but hadn�t mentioned anything to the blonde. He figured if Cloud hadn�t said anything then he shouldn�t bring it up and worry him for no reason. But both he and Sephiroth had figured it was just because Cloud was sensitive to Mako that that had happened. Maybe the Professor had in fact confirmed that.

�Zack?� Cloud asked while giving the other a bit of a confused look.

�Hmm?� the SOLDIER replied before shaking his head to rid his thoughts. �Yeah, sorry.�

�It�s nothing�really,� Cloud continued to explain knowing that Zack was probably worrying about it now that he had spoke up. �General Sephiroth told me if it was that Professor Hojo would�ve put it in my file and told me about it. I just wanted to double check.�

Zack nodded before snaking his arm around his boyfriends waist, �That�s good. I know Seph would check into it anyways if he thought it was a problem.� As soon as he spoke those words however he had to think to himself if the General did in fact look into it. He knew that Seph wasn�t much of a fan of the Professor�s and if he thought something was wrong he definitely wouldn�t sit idly by.

�Yeah,� Cloud spoke softly while leaning into the SOLDIER as Zack tightened his hold on him before placing a kiss on the top of his head. Despite the conversation between the Professor and Cloud Zack couldn�t help but still let his curiosity get the best of him.
************************************************************************

�Strife!�

�Yes sir?�

�I need you to help with the security for the SOLDIERS boarding the planes. I�ll have someone else cover your usual post.�

�Yes sir,� the blonde answered his colonel before making his way to the runways where the planes were stationed.

This morning had been a lot more hectic than usual, there were a few different assignments and SOLDIERS from all different classes were going on the missions. The grounds were covered with Shinra military and Cloud had to keep focused to make sure he didn�t get lost in the crowds. It was times like this where he remembered that he was still the small runt. Passing by all the other SOLDIERS made him feel weak and it was a clear reminder that he wasn�t a SOLDIER, only a recruit in Special ops.

The wind got stronger as he approached the runway area and he heard people shouting to talk over the sounds of the engines and the loud howling wind.

�Sir!� Cloud began once he reached the loading terminal. He figured this was the guy in charge of the area from his uniform and the way he seemed to be monitoring everything. �Colonel Fuji sent me here.�

�Ah right,� the man replied while marking something off on his clipboard, �stay here and make sure everyone who boards the plane is on this list,� he explained while handing the clipboard over to the blonde.

�Yes sir.�

He had only been there about five minutes before a few people started to board the plane and he checked them off on the list.

�I�m only getting on this if I�m riding first class,� a voice spoke up over the wind.

Glancing up from the clipboard Cloud was about to say something sarcastic until he realized he knew the person. �Kyo!�

Laughing the SOLDIER caught the recruit in a tight embrace, �what the hell are you doing here!? I feel like I haven�t seen you in forever!�

�That�s because you haven�t,� Cloud replied as they pulled apart, �you�ve been so busy.�

�I know,� Kyo replied while stepping out of the way as a few more SOLDIERS boarded the plane after Cloud checked them off on the list.

�Where is this mission too anyways?� Cloud asked while turning his focus back to his friend.

�Wutai, it�s pretty far away,� Kyo explained, �but I�ve always wanted to go there.�

�Wutai,� Cloud repeated with a nod.

�We need to figure out when we both are free so we can do something! It�s been too long since we�ve hung out!�

�Yeah we really should,� Cloud replied with a smile, �believe it or not I actually miss you�re obnoxious self.�

�Yeah and I miss your mood swings,� Kyo shot back with a grin.

The blonde laughed with a shake of his head. Aside from Zack Kyo knew him best. After living with someone for so long you got to know them inside and out, and he and Kyo were a good example of that.

�So how about when I get back we go and grab a few drinks huh? It�ll give us a chance to catch up,� Kyo suggested while squinting his eyes a bit from the wind.

�That sounds good,� Cloud replied with a smile.

�Great!� Kyo beamed before ruffling the blonde�s hair. He was the first one who had did that to him when he came to Midgar and at first it annoyed the hell out Cloud, but now it would feel weird if his friend didn�t do that. �Well I better get my ass on board before my officer sees me chatting it up.�

�Alright,� the blonde replied while making sure to check off Kyo�s name on the list, �be careful.�

�Yeah you too,� Kyo began while heading up the ramp to board the plane, �I�ll see you when I get back!�

�Ok, I�ll be looking for you!� Cloud called after the SOLDIER while giving him a wave once he made it to the entrance. Kyo flashed him another smile before turning and walking further into the plane before he was finally out of sight.

The recruit kept his gaze locked on the entryway that his friend had just walked down as smile touched his lips. It was really nice to see Kyo again, he hadn�t seen him since he had made it into third class and with running into him again just now it made him realize even more how much he missed seeing him daily like he used to.

�Excuse me did you check me off?� A voice asked.

�Huh?� Cloud began while turning and looking at a SOLDIER standing in front of him, �Oh sorry,� he replied quickly while looking at the man�s badge before checking him off on the list.

Letting out a sigh he focused on his task instead of letting his thoughts wander. Although he couldn�t shake the feeling that he and Kyo probably wouldn�t get that drink like they had just said. Kyo was way too busy and Cloud had his own agenda. Just like they had said when they moved out of their room that they would still see each other and hang out, it hadn�t happened yet and Cloud was sure it probably wouldn�t. Maybe not ever but for the time being. And he couldn�t deny that he just had a feeling that it wouldn�t happen. They were in two separate classes, and once again class seemed to be everything in Shinra. But he was sure that Kyo would be deployed just as quickly upon his arrival back in Midgar that he wouldn�t have any free time to spend with Cloud. Surely any time he did have he would want to spend with Lana anyways.

Once the area had finally cleared up for the most part and everyone on his list was checked off Cloud became a little nervous. Nervous like he always was when Zack went on an assignment, no matter how big or small it was it was a feeling that would never disappear. And while he knew Kyo had been on a lot of missions now he found himself having that same feeling for his friend like he did for Zack. But out of all the people that he had met in Midgar Zack and Kyo were the only ones who he genuinely cared about, so he supposed it was only natural for him to be concerned.

The plane started up and the propellers began to turn once the blonde had made it back inside, watching the plane from behind the glass windows. It moved down the runway slowly as it began to pick up speed before it finally ascended into the air. Cloud watched it for a while until it was entirely out of sight and the once noisy area had quieted down.

�See ya later Kyo,� he mumbled quietly. It was sort of strange how he saw his friend off on a mission when they always used to assume that they would be going on their missions together, back at the time when they thought they both would make it into SOLDIER.

Glancing down at the clipboard in his hands he figured he should stop staring out into space and drop this off at his Colonel�s office and see what other task he had lined up for him for the day.
************************************************************************

�Are we almost done here, I don�t plan on spending the night in the office,� Zack complained while resting his head on the desk.

Sephiroth kept jade eyes on him for a moment and then glancing to the clock, �It�s only a little past seven in the evening.�

�Still!� Zack began while snapping his head up, �We�ve been in here all day!�

�No, we just got back here about half an hour ago,� the General explained while looking over some papers, not giving Zack�s whines any attention at all.

�That�s it? Really? Damn,� the SOLDIER replied while leaning back in his chair.

�Zackary you need to learn patience,� Sephiroth replied.

�I am patient,� Zack answered with a bit of a frown. He didn�t get a response though so he figured Sephiroth was done with arguing about this little topic.

�There are a lot of new cadets, I think the next SOLDIER examination should be interesting,� Sephiroth spoke while keeping his eyes fixed on the papers before him.

�Yeah well we�ll see how many of them are actually good,� Zack added with a smirk.

�That we will,� the General continued.

�Oh yeah Seph I meant to ask you,� Zack began while leaning forward in his chair, �Did you talk to Professor Hojo about Cloud a while ago?�

�Concerning?� Sephiroth asked while finally lifting his gaze.

�I guess Cloud came to you asking about his Mako infusion. He was a little worried about it after all. I assumed everything was fine and the Professor said it was when we ran into him earlier but�what did he tell you?�

�It�s nothing Zackary, Cloud�s fine. Don�t worry yourself over it,� the General replied while dropping his gaze.

�What does that mean?� Zack continued to ask while narrowing his eyes.

�What�s not to understand in that comment?� Sephiroth asked while giving Zack a stern look.

�You know what Cloud means to me. You would tell me if there was something wrong�right?� Zack continued to press, His eyes softening and searching the General�s.

There was a brief pause before Sephiroth spoke up. �Of course Zackary, you should know that.�

Nodding Zack sat back in his seat slowly, �I know�sorry.�

Shuffling through some papers the General let out a sigh, �I suppose you are free to go, the rest of this we can finish up tomorrow. We�re going to need to reevaluate the Wutai mission.�

�Wutai? What for?� Zack asked while standing up from his seat.

�There�s been a few fatalities, carelessness really on the officers part. I�m looking into it,� Sephiroth explained while handing a folder over to the SOLDIER. �They were sent out without enough security and Wutai already has issues with Shinra. We aren�t welcomed there which is why we needed to take precaution, but not all of the officers understood that.�

Shaking his head Zack opened the folder and began to look over its contents. His breath caught in his throat as he read the information and his eyes widened slightly. �Have these been confirmed for sure?�

�The SOLDIERS that were lost?� The General asked.

�Yeah,� Zack replied anxiously.

�Yes,� Sephiroth began with a nod, �I believe the body count is up to four, which is why I�m pulling them out. They�ll be sent back after I have a proper meeting with their superiors.�

Keeping his eyes fixed on the contents Zack barely heard the rest of what Sephiroth had said. All he heard was yes, the names of the deceased were confirmed. And that information along with the name that he saw in the folder was enough to make the world stop for a minute.

�Is there a problem Zackary?� the General questioned.

�I�I uh, sort of knew one of them,� he replied quietly while closing the folder and placing it back on the desk.

Pausing briefly Sephiroth spoke up, �I�m sorry.� Zack knew he meant it even though the General�s tone hardly ever changed, to somebody who didn�t know him they probably would�ve thought he was being cold about the situation. But fact of the matter was things such as this didn�t phase him, maybe it was what happened after being in the military for so long. Then again, no matter how long Zack had been with Shinra, a death still affected him, not to the point that he let it hinder his job, he learned that he had to separate the two a long time ago. It was all apart of being apart of Shinra Military, and he had accepted that. But Cloud he hadn�t experienced it yet�but he was going to.

�Yeah,� Zack replied while turning and heading towards the door, �I�ll see ya tomorrow.�

He made his way back to the apartment slowly his mind completely confused on how he was going to handle the situation.

It had only been a couple of days ago that Cloud was telling him how he ran into Kyo before he left for his assignment. And even though it was a brief encounter Cloud was practically beaming about it. He remembered how down Cloud had been when Kyo had moved out of the lower class barracks, Kyo was the first person in the whole place that had treated Cloud like a person, like anybody else and not an outsider. He was there before Zack and probably even knew things about Cloud that not even he knew. He was Cloud�s best and probably first friend at all, so how was he�how could Zack tell him that he was gone?

He hadn�t even realized that he was standing in front of the door of his apartment. And yet he couldn�t bring himself to go inside. Because he knew on the other side of that door was the person he loved whose heart he was going to have to break�and he didn�t want to do that. He couldn�t do that.

Leaning his head against the door he took in a deep breath. No, he had to, he had to do this. He couldn�t have Cloud hear it elsewhere, or be searching for Kyo once the SOLDIERS from the Wutai assignment got back, wondering why his friend didn�t step off of the plane that he had saw him off in.

That would hurt even more, and besides knowing something like this and not saying anything and looking into Cloud�s innocent blue eyes would be to much.

Finally he pulled out his key and opened the door, closing it behind him softly before moving down the entrance way and stepping into the living room where Cloud was stretched out on the couch snacking on a bag of chips.

�Hey,� he said with a smile while turning his focus towards the SOLDIER.

�Hey babe,� Zack tried to reply in his usual way while walking over to the other and placing a light kiss on his lips.

�I was waiting for you to get back,� Cloud explained while pulling himself up to a sitting position, �I wanted to order out. What do you want?�

�Uh�whatever you want,� Zack spoke a little more softly than he intended.

�Really? No demands? That�s strange,� Cloud began with a raised eyebrow before leaning in and kissing Zack on the cheek.

�Sorry, it�s just been a long day,� Zack continued trying to force a smile.

�I understand,� the blonde replied while hopping off of the couch to retrieve the phone.

�Actually�Cloud,� Zack began while reaching out and grabbing Cloud�s wrist before he could walk away, �I uh�I need to talk to you.�

�Oh,� Cloud replied while sitting back down on the couch with a questioning look on his face, �about what?�

�Uh,� Zack started before looking at the ground trying to come up with the words to say.

The silence that fell between them made Cloud feel uneasy. Zack was never speechless, he was always able to talk, especially to him.

�What�s wrong?� Cloud asked quietly, a little afraid to hear the answer.

Lifting his gaze Zack looked into the worried wide eyes of his boyfriend. That was just what he needed, that made it even harder. Closing his eyes briefly he let out a sigh. Here he was trying to find the right words to tell Cloud and then it hit him�maybe there were no right words. After all, something like this, no matter how you worded it it still wouldn�t change the fact that his best friend was gone.

�Zack?� Cloud asked his voice a little louder than before as he tried to search the others eyes once they opened, but it was hard to do seeing as how Zack couldn�t hold his gaze for a long period of time. And that in itself was enough to let the blonde know something was really wrong. �Please�you�re scaring me,� he continued as his voice quieted again.

�I�m sorry,� Zack finally spoke while reaching out and taking Cloud�s hands in his, �I just�this is kind of hard.�

�Is�is it about us?� Cloud asked as he felt his eyes begin to sting with tears that threatened to fall.

�What?� Zack began while looking into scared blue eyes, �Babe no, of course not,� he replied while reaching out to touch the side of the blonde�s face.

�Then what?� Cloud continued to ask while squeezing Zack�s hand.

�I�Seph was talking about needing to reevaluate an assignment�the Wutai assignment. They�ve been called back because,� he paused while dropping his gaze briefly and then looking back into Cloud�s eyes, �it didn�t go to well.�

�It didn�t go to well?� Cloud questioned.

�Yeah there were a few fatalities, I�m not sure on all the details but the mission wasn�t executed properly and��

�Wutai?� Cloud asked as his eyes narrowed a bit in thought and Zack could tell that he was maybe starting to put together the pieces in his mind. His eyes widened and he sat frozen for a minute while holding Zack�s gaze. Maybe waiting for him to continue or tell him to not get the wrong idea, but Zack just remained silent before looking back to the ground.

�W, what are you trying to say?� Cloud began as a few tears rolled down his face. �Kyo? Is he alright!? Is it him!?� He shouted while turning Zack�s face so that he would look at him.

�I�m so sorry Cloud,� Zack spoke softly while looking into the shocked face of his boyfriend and feeling his own heart break at the tears that were now beginning to run down the blonde�s face.

�No,� Cloud began while leaning back and pulling his hand away from Zack�s. �He can�t be�maybe it was a mistake. They can�t know for sure, maybe-�

�Babe,� Zack cut in while shaking his head, �it�s�no.�

�He�s,� Cloud started in disbelief while trailing off. His eyes were still fixed on Zack but his gaze seemed to be looking through him rather than at him. Almost as if he were entirely somewhere else.

�Cloud,� Zack began while reaching out for him only to have the blonde move back. A silence fell over the two of them before Cloud dropped his gaze to the floor briefly before standing up and walking away.

�Cloud,� Zack called after him as he watched the blonde move slowly towards the hallway.

�I don�t feel so good,� the recruit replied, �I think I just need to lie down and I�ll be�� stopping at the middle of the hallway before he hit the bedroom he leaned against the wall before his legs seemed to give out from underneath him and he crumpled to the floor.

Zack was up in an instant and had rushed into the hall kneeling next to the other.

�This isn�t happening,� the blonde cried while leaning against the wall before hitting it hard with his fist. Zack quickly grabbed his hand as he made another move to hit the wall, he didn�t want Cloud hurting himself and he knew it was a possibility given the state he was in. He tried to pull away from Zack and was thrashing around telling him to leave him alone, but Zack just pulled him away from the wall and wrapped his arms around him, holding him close to him. And finally Cloud realized that he needed Zack and that pushing him away right now was the worst thing he could do. Because he didn�t know how to handle this, and he couldn�t handle it by himself. He wrapped his arms around the SOLDIER and continued to cry as Zack leaned back against the wall holding Cloud tight in his arms trying to soothe and comfort him as best he could.

�It�s not fair,� Cloud spoke between sobs while clenching Zack�s shirt in his fist as he buried his face in his chest while his body shook with each cry that escaped from him.

�I know,� Zack whispered as he tried hard not to let a tear escape from his eye. Whether it was from the fact of Kyo�s death or from seeing his boyfriend in tears he wasn�t sure. But he hated to see Cloud cry, it was the thing that hurt him worst of all. But had never seen the blonde cry like this. Usually they were tears of frustration or sadness. But this? This was deeper than that and every cry that erupted from the boys throat stabbed a little deeper into Zack�s heart. And it hurt him, it hurt him a lot. But just as always he had to be strong for Cloud, because right now it probably seemed like his world had just gotten a little bit darker.

Cloud wondered if his tears would ever stop, everything felt so surreal to him. He had just saw Kyo. It had been like old times, they said they would hang out as soon as he got back. But now�that could never happen. He remembered feeling nervous when the plane took off but he didn�t pay it any real mind, but maybe he should�ve. He had a feeling that they wouldn�t get that drink but�why? Why did he feel that way? He told himself it was because Kyo was so busy that they wouldn�t meet up but�was it really a gut feeling that he knew something bad was going to happen? Maybe if he had just voiced it, spoke up, maybe Kyo would still be alive. Maybe he wouldn�t have gone on that assignment. He couldn�t help but cry harder at that thought. Kyo was his best friend and had protected him as best he could since coming to Midgar and in the end Cloud didn�t do a thing to protect him.

He remembered when they first got into their room and Kyo tried to make small talk with him, but Cloud being as untrusting of people as he was simply brushed him off or said something sarcastic back always being on defense mode. It was then that Kyo had said he had an attitude problem and they got into an argument before Kyo left out saying he was going to get a drink. And even though Cloud was upset at him for him saying he had a bad attitude he couldn�t understand why Kyo hadn�t tried to actually fight him like every other person he ran into tried to do. But once Kyo had gotten back he tried talking to Cloud again as if they hadn�t even argued earlier. It was strange to Cloud, because he had never had someone talk to him without some sort of ulterior motive, just someone actually trying to be nice. For whatever reason though Kyo was nice to him and Cloud eventually started to warm up to him and over the course of his stay in Midgar they had become close�and now just like that, it was gone. He was gone. They would never joke around like they used to, or fight over stupid things, or train together or go out for drinks�it was just all gone.

He wasn�t sure how long he stayed there in Zack�s arms crying and thinking about Kyo in his mind, but it felt like forever. A painful eternity that still seemed to be so unreal. But he eventually cried himself to sleep, lying still in Zack�s arms.

The SOLDIER remained where they were for a while as he gently ran his hands through blonde spikes. His boyfriends cries had finally ceased and he felt the steady breathing of the other letting him know he was asleep.

Moving very carefully he positioned the blonde in his arms before standing to his feet and moving to the bedroom. He kicked the door closed with his foot as he stepped inside the room before crossing over to the bed where he laid the blonde down gently. He was careful not to move to suddenly, he didn�t want to wake him up. At least in his sleep he could have some kind of peace rather than being awake and having to deal with the harsh reality.

Sighing Zack ran a hand through his hair. Cloud was right, �this wasn�t fair.� But�life wasn�t always fair. And no matter how much Zack wished he could�ve prevented this, there was nothing he could do and the feeling of helplessness was horrible. But he would be there for Cloud, he would get him through this no matter how hard it was. Cloud had been through so much in his life already, he had to grow up fast and Zack didn�t know why but the fact still remained the same that he did. But instead of having all of the bad things in his life tear him down, Zack would show him how it could make him stronger. It was the only thing you could do when things out of your control happened.

Walking away from the bed he started to change out of his SOLDIER attire wanting nothing more to crawl into bed and wake up and see that this had all been a nightmare. However he knew that wasn�t going to happen.

Shifting a bit blue eyes cracked open to see that the spot on the bed beside him was empty. The spot that Zack usually occupied. �Zack?� Cloud asked into the dark while sitting up slightly. With his mind being so jumbled and the fact the he had just awoken threw him off a bit and he found himself being a little paranoid.

�Cloud,� Zack spoke as he crossed back over to the bed to see Cloud sitting upright, �Babe I�m right here, it�s okay,� he explained quietly while leaning on the bed and grabbing Cloud�s hand to reassure him and calm him down.

Tired blue eyes rested on him briefly before Zack eased him back onto the bed as he settled beside him.

�It�s alright,� the SOLDIER began while pulling Cloud closer towards him. Now that the blonde had woken up Zack didn�t know if he would fall back to sleep anytime soon. There was probably too much on his mind for him to really be able to relax right now anyways. He reached down and pulled the blankets up over the two of them as he felt Cloud wrap his arms tightly around him, pulling him even more closer then they already were.

�Zack,� Cloud spoke so quietly that Zack wasn�t even sure that he had really heard right.

�Yeah?� He answered a little unsure.

Cloud fell silent for a while and Zack would�ve thought he had fallen back to sleep if it weren�t for his quiet sobs and the wetness of his tears that he felt seep through his shirt.

�Remember you promised me something,� he finally spoke up again with a sniffle, �don�t forget that.�

Zack knew right away what he was talking about and he nodded before kissing him on top of his head, �Never, I�m not going anywhere babe,� he replied softly while caressing the recruits arm. �Don�t worry.�
************************************************************************

A/N: Omg and there's chap 21! Sorry for the delay, I figured I would post this since it was a bit overdue and just extend chap 22, but no worries because I'm working on it already! About four chapters to go, Cloud's first experience with death I thought was sort of crucial and so I decided to use his best friend...I know cruel, but I liked Kyo to so killing him off was hard but I did it for sake of the story! And I'm sure everyone is caught on to the foreshadowing. Oh and the conversation with Zack and Seph about Hojo, Seph sort of lied to him, did you guys get that? Don't worry it'll be explained in the next chap. And o yeah, if you really look into it back into chap 2 I think it was, with the mention of the buster sword and Zack saying Cloud might be expert at it, well that tied in to the begining here and of course we all know later Cloud is going to be expert at it. I thought that was a cool way to twist it in there...uh...I think I touched on all the bases. Anyway, this author's note is getting long, will post chap 22 up soon! Thanks for the reviews everyone and for sticking with the story, you guys are seriously awesome!
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